The Hypothetical Game

When I was a kid my best friend and I loved playing the hypothetical game. In case you are unfamiliar with this pastime it basically involves inquiring as to the minimum limits of compensation it would take to get the other person to experience something downright horrible. For example, “How much money would it take for you to run up to ugly Julie right now and kiss her on the mouth?” (We were juvenile, I know.) Or maybe, “How many Snickers would it take to get you to eat an entire earthworm?”

The consequences of such actions are fairly clear. My friend would probably be slapped by Julie and made a social pariah in the first case, and would likely vomit in the latter. Oh, but the sweet reward. We all have our price, and this is the beauty of the hypothetical game. (I think at age 10 it was somewhere around $100 and 2 1/2, respectively.)

The health version of the hypothetical game goes something like this: What sort of compensation would it take to get you to experience an intense blood sugar spike, increased urinary excretion of essential minerals, followed by an extended period of irritability and lethargy? Would a single can of soda do the trick? Most people would say no in all honesty, but do just the opposite in action. Strange, huh?

What happens if…

you drink a can of Coke right now?

One can of coke contains about 10 teaspoons of sugar

you stay awake for 11 days straight?

Keep those eyes open!!!

you keep puffing away? (Warning: Graphic Image and Large File >7 mb)

In some cases two isn't better than one

you party a little too hardy?

Hangover Central

you play golf during a thunderstorm?

You lose all of your skin?

you stop smoking right now?


you are a child that watches too much television?

4 hours a day keeps the skinny away

you imbibe alcohol during pregnancy?

and last but not least…

you play too close to the event horizon?

It will suck the life out of ya ;)

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