Why We’re Missing Out on Real Life (plus a Primal Health Challenge)
Over the past couple weeks, I’ve identified two deficits in our modern lives – the lack of sprinting and the lack of walking – and proposed a series of corresponding challenges to address (and hopefully fill) those deficits. Judging from the responses, I think these articles were successful. Today, I’m trying my hand at highlighting another problem, this time one that has nothing to do with physical fitness. In fact, it deals with perhaps the most physically inactive activity you’ll ever do: staring at a smartphone as the world gets on around you. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not anti-technology (duh), or even anti-smartphone (got one myself). I have the accumulated knowledge of the world in my pocket, and that’s pretty darn useful. I can find out where to get the best Greek food within five miles. I can bank, I can order flights to far off lands, I can check traffic, I can check shopping lists, read email, text, tweet, friend, defriend, like, oh, and make phone calls – all from the comfort of my 3.5 inch touch screen. That’s incredible. It also makes it really, really easy to get too comfortable and avoid actually experiencing the real, physical world.
I mean, when you stop and step outside of yourself for a second, and you think about the level of technology we can access, it starts feeling like we’re in the future. Of course, the future will never actually feel like “The Future” because we’ll have caught up to it and gotten used to it, but if a Connecticut Yankee appeared in our midst from the 19th (or even late 20th) century, he’d be blown away. It’s awesome and empowering and all those great things, but is there a dark side to it, too?
Our relationship with technology is not quite as dire as a Philip K. Dick novel, with programmable moods and emotions replacing real ones and electric pets replacing organic ones. It’s also not quite like the Jetsons, where flying cars, robot maids, moving sidewalks, auto-cooking kitchens, and other advanced tech enhanced human engagement with the world and its inhabitants. Ours lies somewhere in between. We’re getting along, it’s not a dystopia, but I think there are some very real problems that need to be acknowledged. Namely, smartphones, social media, and the Internet in general has changed the way we experience the world. For many, it has replaced engagement with the real physical world almost entirely. And that’s bad. We’re really missing out.
Okay, how about some stats? Let’s see what we’re dealing with.
In Britain, 81% of smartphone users have it on all day, every day. Almost half of smartphone users, upon being woken up by a phone call or text or misplaced alarm at night, end up using the phone instead of shutting it off and going back to sleep. Over half of adults and two-thirds of teens regularly use their phones while socializing with others in person (there’s nothing like a tableful of people staring at their phones in unison, is there?). About a quarter of adults use their phone during dinner. A third of teens can say the same. 47% of teens use their phones on the toilet, while just over a fifth of adults do the same (don’t they know the bathroom is for thumbing through the wife’s Cosmo?).
In the US, 59% of teens admit that they go online too much, 58% say they use smartphones way too much, and 48% use Facebook (and other social media sites). Of course, they admit it, but they don’t do anything about it. But hey, at least they’re watching less TV!
Internet Addiction Disorder is now a real thing, gaining acceptance as a legitimate clinical disorder and characterized by the classic trappings of a substance addiction. A series of studies out of China have found large structural differences between the brains of Internet addicts and controls, including impairments in white matter fibers involved in emotional generation and processing, executive attention, decision making, and cognitive control (PDF). I’m not saying we’re all full-blown Internet addicts, but there’s a spectrum, and I think a lot of people are hurtling along it.
Near as I can tell, this is a real problem. A recent study even found that people who stopped checking their email for a week were more productive and experienced less stress (as indicated by the heart rate monitors attached to them for the duration of the experiment) than the folks who maintained their email habits. Those who checked emails switched windows an average of 37 times per hour, while the email abstainers switched windows just 18 times per hour. More than objective effects on productivity and stress, though, I just find it really sad to see people miss out on life because they “had” to check their phone. It’s sad seeing strollers full of wide-eyed babies who are absolutely amazed at everything they’re seeing – that bushy squirrel tail flashing across the powerline overhead, the cat sunning itself on the sidewalk, a garbage can left out from garbage day, a bush, a cloud, a man on a recumbent bike, a leaf fluttering down from treetops - pushed by moms and dads with their eyes glued to their 3.5 inch screens, totally oblivious to the sensory explosions going on in their offspring but completely up-to-date on whether or not someone “liked” their most recent status update. “Ooh, red notification!” At least take a photo of the kid or something, sheesh.
Okay, time to fess up.
In the past week, what’s the longest you’ve gone without checking your smartphone, surfing the web, or checking Facebook, Twitter, or your email? Just give a ballpark figure. You don’t need to be exact. Sleep doesn’t count (nice try). Waking hours only.
In other words…
Loading ...How’d you do? I didn’t do that great, actually – I’m in the four to six range.
So here’s your challenge for the week: don’t use your phone or check your email after 7 PM for the next seven days. Extenuating circumstances? Sure, fine. Don’t lose your job over this or anything like that, but do your best to avoid those frivolous mindless thoughtless check-ins “just because.”
This may sound easy. 7 PM? Psh. Assuming you go to bed around 10, 10:30, 11 PM, that’s just a few hours of downtime. You can do that. Right? I was originally going to make it a bit more hardcore, but I think this is easy enough that everyone can hit it if they try, and dramatic enough that you’ll see and feel a real difference.
We’ll see. If it was so easy, if real life was so preferable to a smartphone, you’d already be doing it on your own. Don’t disappoint me!
One more thing: don’t just turn off the phone and close the laptop and turn on the TV. No, do something. Go out dancing. Light some candles and have a game night. Go for a walk. Go for a night hike. Take a short vacation (and leave the phone altogether). Engage with the physical world and its inhabitants, face to face. And let this engagement with the world carry over to the rest of your time, your “connected” time. Smartphone usage and being present are not mutually exclusive, believe it or not.
Please, whatever you do, keep that phone off, in your pocket, or back at home when you go on a walk with your kid. Don’t shuffle along, oblivious to the world around you, eyes and attention trained on that screen.
Okay, I’ve said my piece. Now it’s your turn. Get out there and stop missing out on real life!
Oh, and tell me how that sprint challenge from last week went. Did you get it done? Leave a comment!
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Posted By: Mark Sisson
I’m proud to say I don’t (yet?) own a smartphone
I sprinted up a hill X 6 with rest in between. I also completed the previous slow movement challenge, and kept it up for the next week too.
Does the computer count in this challenge? I tend to have it on in the evening and am constantly keeping tabs open that tell me if I have a new message in multiple websites. I think I should take this challenge on, and maybe I can finish my sewing project that I have on the go.
Keep the challenges coming.
Best challenge yet!! I need this so badly. Not sure it will happen tonight due to some deadlines, but definitely the rest of the week!!
I almost clicked on 2-4, thinking that you meant minutes…when I saw that you meant hours, I realized I had a problem.
My initial reaction was to retweet this. I think I also have a problem.
Got a few hour walks in last week but the computer/ phone thing is something I admittedly need to work hard at. I just got an iphone so the allure of it has not quite settled. And being a blogger and photographer, well a lot of time is inevitably spent on the computer. I’m going to give this challenge a go though!
Someone told me, “You’re hard to get a hold of.”
I wanted to say, “Then, please quit trying to get a hold of me.”
I am only too grateful to lose my Smartphone for the weekend and in the evenings.
I still remember the good old days, when if someone couldn’t get ahold of you, they left a message.
And at the risk of dating myself, the good even older days when they couldn’t leave a message and had to call you back, if it was that important….
+1!
And most of the time they didn’t call back as it wasn’t that important.
I am so happy to read today’s post. I have a 2.5 year old and I cannot believe the number of parents who are reading/typing away on their phones while their kids are playing on the equipment.
I have actually had two different moms (at different times) comment to me how nice it is that I play with my daughter. I find it incredible that more people don’t–it helps me to connect with her, and I find it relaxing and enjoyable!
I also don’t pick up my cell phone after I get home from work–from 6pm until about 8am the next morning (so yes, including sleep time), I am unreachable via email/Facebook/other internet. If my friends want to reach me, they know I have a home phone and they can call me there.
I feel rather old-fashioned for being like this, but at the same time, I need time to be AWAY from the computer and the internet (given that I’m a worker bee form 9am to 5pm). And, Real Life is just more interesting and fun!
When my son was younger, we used to play “Monster” at the playground–I would chase him all over the equipment trying to catch him. Often other kids would join in and I would chase them all–while the other parents sat on the sidelines. I’ve never understood this. Everyone should play.
If it wasn’t for our addiction to technology Mark, you wouldn’t make as much money.
I don’t really think that is a fair thing to say. He admitted that he is using technology but I think he is honest in his suggestions to help us improve our lives.
I definitely think that the iPhone/iPad app needs to be expanded upon, updated, and improved. A lot can be done with it, it can even be made to be practical tool. You could make a free version and a version that costs a few bucks that offers the special features — I’d pay it.
It would also be good to see greater commission incentive and structure for affiliates of Primal Nutrition.
The one that makes me positively (I mean it) sick are parents glued to their smartphone screens at church events while their little ones cling to their sides watching without parental involvement.
Here in the Bay Area everyone plays Phone Stack – when you go out with friends you all stack your phones in the center of the table and try to ignore them. The person who reaches for their phone or takes a call has to pay for all the drinks!
Usually I take part of the weekend off away from social media and the internets. I understand that some people feel the need to be rude with cell phones. But if I’m at the table eating with family the phone doesn’t get answered. I feel if it’s important, they can leave a message. I will admit all of the information at my finger tips is addicting, but it can be overwhelming too. My bf and I usually do board game night or something similar on the weekends. There really does have to be a balance.
set out to do 10 short uphill sprints this morning, but bailed out on #5 w a slight muscle pull in left calf
OK OK, going to begin this, tonight!
Here’s a guy who has attached his i-Pod to his arm via magnetic studs implanted in his arm. Would that be (h)arm-less???
http://www.stuff.co.nz/technology/gadgets/6924608/Man-inserts-studs-in-arm-to-attach-iPod
Yep, I’m right there at the 4-6 range, too…the ‘net is my coffee break, ’cause I work at home. On, siiiigh, the computer, a lot. I teach online. I run lists. I market. I sell on eBay. And then for fun I check my email or browse. Sorry state of affairs, sometimes!
But I DID build a little shed/studio 2 years ago, with no phone, no computer, no TV, just art supplies and books and music and nature all around–and friends, on occasion.
I’d been trying to get away from the machine by 8 pm, so I’ll take your challenge and gladly!
I wish I could… but as a freelance designer who is self employed, the tradeoff for being able to schedule my own time is to be always reachable no matter where I am. Dinner, errands, no matter what. Lots of last second work and quick turnarounds all the time. I was actually grateful for the smartphone so I could leave my home office during business hours and not worry about missing important emails. Compared to my previous life of 14 hour days as an in house full time designer, I’ll take the technology addiction in order to have time to get out, see the sun, exercise, make spontaneous plans, ride a bike, sleep in, etc. if I want a real vacation, I’ll go somewhere with no phone service… like the ocean.
Great take on this. I feel the same:
http://existanew.com/2012/03/22/disconnection-anxiety/
one of many great things about observing Jewish Sabbath is: 25 HOURS of NO TV, NO PHONE, NO COMPUTER!!
we play board games, legos, we SING, TALK face to face with friends!! every single week….and lately, I have not been turning on my computer Saturday night,since I dont want the “blue light” to mess with my sleep. next weekend is a 2-day Holiday following Sabbath – 3 full days free of technology. awesome! but I’m going to try to turn-it-off at 7 during the week,
and see how I do!
Ha. I got Internet-addicted *because* I was missing out on real life. Joining the Army at 18, marrying at 21, and having a kid at 22 kind of sheltered me from the fact that my family was crazy and that people I’d thought were my friends didn’t really deserve the title. (I was kind of a mess in high school.) Having my marriage end suddenly when I was on the brink of 25 left me alone and unanchored. At least on the Internet I could find like-minded people who wanted to have conversations with me.
I’m going in the other direction now, realizing that it’s kind of tough to form personal connections if I’m on the Internet all day long (well, except when I’m taking care of personal commitments with family and around the house). Then again, I’m afraid that if I go looking for friends, all I’ll find are “clubs and activities” for people who share one interest among themselves. That is SO BORING, and seems to be replicating what I’m finding online. No one seems to want to be an actual friend anymore, they’re so used to living in echo chambers.
So I see the merit in cultivating a more offline life. In theory. But I’m afraid the theory won’t match up with the reality.
Now that my comment is at the verrry end I’m not sure if anyone is going to read this but…
After the baby was born, in an effort to save money we got rid of the smart phones and got phones that just dialed. No texts, no internet. We also got rid of cable since both of us work full-time and went to bed at 7:30 because we were so exhausted. Besides, we didn’t have time to watch tv so why spend the extra $80/month?
Getting rid of the phones and cable was so liberating! We ate dinner at the table every night, actually TALKED and had great intellectual conversations. (Second) best thing that has ever happened to us and our relationship.
We’ve now since diverted to our old ways and it sucks.
Whether it’s a tiny computer screen or a large one, my job (when I am working) involves long hours with a computer. Over the last 20 years the accumulated stress/micro-trauma has taken a toll on my eyeballs, neck, and right wrist.
My escape is travelling to Thailand for extended training camps. That is why I work as a temp, as soon as the work is over, I get as far away from work as possible. My goal is to reverse the active/sedentary ratio of my previous life, before I embraced fitness as a lifestyle. Eventually, the ultimate goal is to reduce my daily computer hours to a bare minimum say 1 or 2 hours per day. I want to now become a fitness trainer.
i love this “no technology after 7″ rule. i try to do this from time to time on my own, when i feel like i am too desk-bound…too addicted to fb. i need to be mindful enough to make it more of a permanent rule….
I have a cabin up north that is pretty remote: propane lights/fridge/stove, pump water from a natural spring, no electricity, and no cell service. It’s great to get up there a few times a year and trully unplug!!
Most my time not-connected is on weekends when I have other things to be doing. Sometimes I’ll go almost the entire weekend without checking in. But during the week I don’t disconnect for maybe but an hour to watch TV/workout/ go for a walk/drive.
Guilty of waking up and having a cheeky surf of the web before falling back asleep. Not good!
Was just contemplating this with a friend the other day; the idea that we’re all living somewhere in the electronic ether as opposed to grounded, in our bodies. Mindfulness and engagement with the here and now has never been more crucial!
I just finished reading this article, it’s 6:55pm, and I’ve decided to sign-off for the evening.
because of my job – this is basically never going to happen for me. I’m on call 24/7 in a various level of tiers all the time and I can’t turn my phone off. I DO limit it as much as I can – at the minimum go outside every hour.
I dont know you guys, but it was a wonderful experience when i tried the sprint challenge.
At first, I wanted the Tabata way rightaway, until I pantz, weez as if im about to die… in the first 20 seconds.
And so I followed Marks advise only in one terms: 8 sets, but I give myself a rest as much as i need. 5, 4, 2 minutes rest in between 20sec dash, I realized and deeply understood something in a week:
- That smoke clouds my breathing lungs,
- that running need not a running shoe (i run in a basketball court to have no excuses)
- that I dont need an expensive clothing just to run. after all, I’ll sweat. and as sprint is a short exercise, why “dress to kill?” torn sleeve shirt and shorts barefoot, im on.
- I dont need energy drinks. Im not in the NBA. I want to run . Hydrate with water. finish my 20sec. thats it
- crazy but I feel, somewhat calm. I gotta sense of, somewhat inner pride for physical.
-wanting more: i did this, what can I do next? push up? pull up one hand?
- THE FIRST RUN IS THE HARDEST. but what helped me is the methapor of a Rocketship: at first it was fighting gravity, then smooth fly. I got smoke, junk in my system, I visualize that Im bit by bit shrugging it off.
- I look cooler than the joggers in our vicinity. fast, explosive and brief kept them wondering “was that enough?” lookin at them was entertaining.
- i found it VERY IDEAL for my hectic schedule. short, sweet, simple. but simple doesnt always count as easy.
I think im hooked. thanks for this challenge
I work full time in IT. But my teams knows you need me after hours call the land line. If I am at home my cell is on a shelf in the basement with my wallet and keys.