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Let me introduce myself. My name is Mark Sisson. I’m 63 years young. I live and work in Malibu, California. In a past life I was a professional marathoner and triathlete. Now my life goal is to help 100 million people get healthy. I started this blog in 2006 to empower people to take full responsibility for their own health and enjoyment of life by investigating, discussing, and critically rethinking everything we’ve assumed to be true about health and wellness...

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December 19, 2006

The Fuming Fuji Says No to Macaroni and Cheese

By Worker Bee
0 Comments

The Fuji Rages

The Fuming Fuji is outraged at the marketing of toxic food, especially when it’s aimed at the small fry. This week, the Fuming Fuji has decided to have a serious problem with macaroni and cheese.

But, Fuming Fuji, you ask, isn’t mac ‘n cheese at least rich in complex carbohydrates, calcium and protein?

The Fuming Fuji says no!

The claim: Fuming Fuji notices a certain brand of mac ‘n cheese promotes itself as having calcium.

The catch: Classroom chalk also has calcium, and it is much less fattening. Children like chalk. Yet they do not sell chalk. Mac ‘n cheese is one of the emptiest foods known to humanity. Cats and dogs agree.

The comeback: Come on. It can’t be that bad, especially if you throw in some diced up hot dogs for protein?

The conclusion: The Fuming Fuji cannot believe what was just said. HOT DOGS? For protein? The Fuji only has time for one outrage per week. This week, it is macaroni and cheese, which is bleached processed flour mixed with chemically-altered powdered cheese product and fat. Enough with the calcium obsession! Calcium does not make up for garbage food.

The catchphrase: Heart Attack ‘n Cheese.

[tags] macaroni and cheese nutrition information, Kraft [/tags]

TAGS:  humor

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