Marks Daily Apple
Serving up health and fitness insights (daily, of course) with a side of irreverence.

Mark's Daily Apple

9 Feb

So You Want to Take Alli?

The oily spotting continues. Healthbolt has the money quote on new diet drug Alli:

“You can also bet your bottom dollar that GSK will be running ads of fabulous looking people living skinny-happy lives on alli in a field of wheat somewhere. They sure as hell won’t be running ads about 16 year old girls, malnourished as-is because of eating disorders (and this is who’s buying over the counter diet pills) passing out in gym class because they have no vitamins in their body…”

There will also no doubt be a floppy-eared puppy somewhere in that field of wheat – though I’m betting on a field of buttercups and violets myself.

For further consideration: at best, this new wonder drug will yield you a 5-10 pound weight loss…after 6 months! And that’s if you diet. And if you exercise. And that number may not be right, anyway, because the study was so shoddy.

I could lose 5 pounds on a bet in a week and it would still be healthier and safer than the Alli method.

If you work out for just 30 minutes a day and simultaneously cut just 200 calories from your daily intake (we’re talking a soda or a latte or just one standard serving of carbs, Apples), you’ll lose 5-10 pounds in one month. Yes. ONE MONTH. And that’s without a drug.

It should never take six months to lose 5 pounds. It should take about two weeks, and you certainly don’t need a drug to do that.

Among things that will take off 5 pounds in far less time than Alli:

(bear in mind this study isn’t totally proven, but then neither is Alli’s)

Yawning

Stretching in your chair

Rolling over one extra time in bed

Smiling at the mailman for once

Thinking about losing weight

Wondering if your friends are thinking about losing weight

Not thinking about losing weight

Remembering you need to put the clothes in the dryer

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8 Feb

The Roundup

Worker Bees’ Daily Bites:

All the health news you love, none of the oily spotting.

1) The Modern Disease

Autism is more rampant than experts previously thought. The debate rages over the causes of autism: mercury poisoning, genetics, natal development – and myths abound. We’ll be bringing you updates, news and unique perspectives from medical experts soon, so stay tuned.

cars

2) Why a Second Opinion Matters

Doctors are humans, and humans aren’t perfect. They make judgment calls just like the rest of us, so consider this news.

steth

3) Men: You Now Have a Reason to Mow the Lawn

A new study proves that men secrete a powerful chemical that attracts women.

lawn

8 Feb

And This Is What I Call a Deal-Breaker

I’m sure you’ve heard the headlines about Orlistat, the obesity drug, being approved for OTC use. What you may not have heard about are the side effects of this fat-blocking drug. Orlistat, which will still be distributed by Rx as Xenical for morbidly obese patients, will now be sold as Alli in drugstores nationwide.

A magic pill it ain’t, Apples. I have a big (pardon the pun) problem with this drug, for several reasons.

1. How It Works

I have no doubt that Alli is going to fly off the shelves faster than bananas in a monkey farm. People want to lose weight without making changes, and that’s the unfortunate truth. Some of us are lazy; some are depressed; some don’t have the information; and like children believing in Santa, many simply want to believe in a magic cure. These folks are the ones GlaxoSmithKline is banking on. Drug companies love a sucker.

Alli “works” (and even this is highly debatable) by blocking fat absorption. This is problematic, to put it lightly.

First of all, fat does not make you fat. The human body was meant to operate in a fat-burning metabolic state. Whether you believe in God or cite Darwin or both, there’s absolutely no disputing this fact.

The advent of grain agriculture is a new thing for humans, relatively speaking, and the transition from a flesh-and-vegetable diet to a grain-and-sugar diet has humans suffering in a glucose-burning state.

The side effects of this high-sugar diet are horrendous: inflammation, heart disease, depression, insomnia, diabetes, mental degeneration, aging, obesity and cancer. Do you still really want to block fat? People I coach are shocked when I put them on a higher-fat diet because mainstream wisdom still worships at the altar of low-fat. Know what happens? Infections clear, cholesterol drops, energy increases, anxiety dissipates, skin glows, and the pounds melt away.

Second, reducing fat deprives your body of vital nutrients, vitamins and antioxidants, which all need fat to metabolize. Blocking fat means you can’t properly absorb critical nutrients, which is why Alli has to be taken with a multivitamin to offset some of the damage.

2. The Law of Unintended Consequences: Oily Stools?

Alli is available under conditional approval. This is the same FDA approval stamp that got us into the HRT and Cox-2 disasters. How many thousands of women suffered from breast cancer and how many people had heart attacks as a result of these reckless approvals? Conditional approval.

As I mentioned the other day in an update on the FDA’s drug woes, conditional approval is a process by which the FDA essentially allows the burden of safety to rest with drug companies. (Yes: more often than you want to know, the FDA lets pharmaceutical companies begin marketing and selling a drug before lengthy testing has been conducted.)

This tacit trust is just super-duper for drug companies eager to sop up years of product development costs with fast cash, but I’m stumped as to how this is beneficial for actual human beings. Can you imagine if farmers, restaurants or vitamin manufacturers like yours truly just up and sold products that knowingly caused serious health issues and thousands of deaths? We’re not talking one or two or even a dozen. We’re talking hundreds of thousands of serious – often fatal – drug reactions every single year. Some estimates go into the millions.

Just who is the FDA supposed to be looking out for?

Alli, among other issues, causes incontinence and oily stools.

And this is the deal-breaker, folks. Anal leakage? Oily spotting? I don’t think so! Alli can also lead to kidney stones, gall stones, breast cancer, and hepatitis. Every time a new drug scandal hits, I think, surely, surely the FDA will make changes. It never happens. This is the definition of insanity: doing the same thing you’ve always done and expecting different results.

There’s a better way to lose weight, but it does take some work – though not nearly as much as you’d think. You can eat fat and drop pounds simultaneously. You can enjoy flavor. You don’t have to be a slave to the treadmill. Stay tuned for tips every day on how to lose weight and feel better – sensibly, enjoyably, without any suffering at all. No spotting, either. We have a strict no-spotting rule around here.

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8 Feb

The Sisson Spoof

Diabetes goes portable!
crispycones

Introducing Crispy Cones, the new portable obesity device hitting food courts everywhere.

I have to admit I’m baffled by the Crispy Cone website. Usually new food products don’t try to make a claim of health if they are obviously junk (processed meat, cheese and empty carbs? Come on!!!). I can cut “borderline” healthy foods like veggie wraps and Cesar salads a break. At least Tacone wraps are better than burgers. But this product is just ridiculous. Crispy cones are basically pizza and tacos in new packaging. And what packaging – processed, hydrogenated bleached flour!

The makers rave about the convenience, and boy do they brag about the no-drip capability of their patented (ooooh) cone. They even point out that hand-held food is – yes – environmentally-friendly. Okay…

When did food stop being a meal and start being something we do while we’re doing other stuff? I’m constantly amazed at how people eat while on the phone, driving, even in meetings. A generation ago, it was considered a pretty horrifying display of bad manners to eat this way, but I guess it’s what we do now. It sure hasn’t made us healthier or slimmer.

The fact that Crispy Cones actually insist on the health of their product is what gets me most. The laugh you will get from the “Go Healthy” tab of the website is worth the click. If this is healthy, God help us!

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