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Never Fails to Inspire

Posted By Mark Sisson On April 12, 2007 @ 12:14 pm In Diet,Health,Humor,Nutrition,Prevention | 2 Comments

Have you gotten to know this little nutrition buddy brought to you by the FDA [7]? If not, I think you ought to reconsider:

- Like many of the processed foods we enjoy in this great country, the exact nature of Labelman’s, er, origin, is difficult to ascertain. Is he a popsicle? A hot dog, perhaps? Maybe a tofu pup? I can’t stand it! I have to know!

- Fans need to know: Does Labelman work out? (If only we could all get muscles like that.) What is Labelman’s favorite shampoo? And is it true that Labelman is courting Zipperedtopgirl?

- Labelman decimates the burgeoning belief that the American government has become cynical and corrupt when it comes to health and nutrition. It doesn’t take a genius to see the level of creative sweat and tears that were clearly poured into this original, inspiring, visually dazzling creation! Like, duh! Even the unique and catchy name – Labelman – belies a sincerity and intensity of concern only our federal government is capable of.

I ask you, dear readers, if the Fuming Fuji [8] met this vision of nutritional inspiration and personality (such brio!), what would happen? The world may soon find out…

Oh, who am I kidding? I’m totally disappointed by this half-hearted offering of nutritional guidance [9]. I’m pretty sure even my pets could come up with something better. I mean, seriously – this is the best they can do with our tax dollars?


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[7] brought to you by the FDA: http://www.cfsan.fda.gov/~ear/hwm/labelman.html

[8] Fuming Fuji: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/category/the-fuming-fuji/

[9] half-hearted offering of nutritional guidance: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/index.php?s=Labelman

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