How to Find Your Personal Tipping Point
Almost all of our Friday success stories have one thing in common (besides the whole Primal thing): they finally “decide to do something about” their health. Something changes. Their health, their stamina, the health of those around them change for the worse, or maybe a diagnosis is made. Whatever it is, life reaches a tipping point, after which change is a hurtling inevitability, moving almost of its own accord. And as you can see from their stories, success comes rather quickly. It’s a few months, sometimes up to a year, but when you consider the immensity of an entire life of ill health, those months or that year are mere blinks of the eye. After that, there’s really no going back.
Okay, but what does a tipping point look like? What does it feel like?
The thing about reaching a personal tipping point – one that effects true, lasting, meaningful change, rather than some fleeting thing – is that it requires engagement of all your faculties. Ever been hit in the solar plexus, that spot right below your sternum? Back when I was a kid, the solar plexus was the holy grail of targets in an impromptu boxing match with friends. For one, you couldn’t aim for the temple, because everyone knows that a direct hit to the temple will kill you in a single blow, and you couldn’t uppercut the nose, because that would surely drive your nasal bone up into your brain. Hitting the solar plexus, meanwhile, left your opponent stunned and breathless. The impact was so jarring that it became your whole world. That test on Friday, the cute girl who sits next to you in math, the fight itself – all that no longer meant anything at all. You could think of nothing else but the sensation radiating from your sternum through the rest of your body, eventually moving beyond the purely physical and on into the emotional. It was wholly consuming on every level.
That’s exactly what your personal tipping point will have to do: affect you on a physical, intellectual, and emotional level. Otherwise, you’ll just talk about it, read about it, hear about other people who are doing it, without ever really making the change yourself.
The question, then, is can artificially reach the tipping point? Can we speed up the process? Can we bypass all the years of suffering, the failures, the setbacks, the proclamations of dire health from medical professionals? Can we somehow ensure a chance run-in with a former classmate who looks better than they did twenty years ago? I think we can speed up the process, if not completely engineer it. For most of us, simply “deciding” to do something out of the blue isn’t enough. I mean, everyone knows that being healthier, leaner, fitter, stronger, and free of pharmaceutical dependence is better, but is that enough to make change happen? No. Look around. People aren’t changing, by and large, regardless of knowledge. Intellectual acknowledgment of the problem isn’t the problem, so to speak.
If you’re reading this blog, and others like it, and you’re hemming and hesitating while looking for your tipping point, you’re way ahead of the curve. You may not think it, but you are. For one, you’re knowledgeable about health. Once you make the decision to embark on the journey toward health and happiness, you know what to do. You know which plan will get you there quickest and which plan will be the most sustainable (hint: it rhymes with “thymal rooprint”). You can pull up the relevant blog posts, you know which book to purchase (or maybe you already have), you know which foods to avoid and which to favor.
Second, you’ve got an open mind. In this day and age, anyone who entertains the possibility that jogging is a waste of time, saturated fat won’t kill you, and whole grains aren’t the godsend they’re made out to be is willing to entertain some alternative ideas about health and fitness. If you’re reading this blog, and doing so on a regular basis, that’s you – unless you get a perverse thrill out of reading about crazy health and nutrition ideas. And having an open mind means you’re open to change, if something comes along to force it.
Third, you know it’s possible. You’ve read the stories, seen the successes, internalized the information, and (perhaps subconsciously) gathered all the anecdotes to arrive at the conclusion that yes, rapid, lasting change is possible. Unless you think all my comments come from bots and/or paid commenters and that I’m just doctoring all these success stories, of course. If that’s so, I’m not sure what I could do to persuade you otherwise. But for the bulk of you, you know that this stuff works.
You’ve got the resources, the know-how, the open mind, and the anecdotes. It’s a big start, a necessary one, but it’s not everything (obviously). It’s not enough for everyone. Otherwise, you’d already be doing it!
So here are some suggestions on how to mastermind a tipping point:
Go to the doctor for a check-up.
I’m not usually one to tell folks to rely on the doctor to tell them how unhealthy they are, but this can be a real eye opener. Go in. Get some tests. Get things felt, measured, and weighed. Be the willing subject of stern, disapproving glances directed your way from behind a clipboard. It almost certainly will be unpleasant, and you might find out some bad news (pre-diabetic, bad lipids, high blood pressure?), but that’s the entire point. As you drive home from the doctor with the sinking realization that your health is unequivocally, objectively on the downward swing, you might arrive home a changed person.
Compare old pictures to current ones.
Remember when you were younger, svelter, and fitter? Revisit old photos and obtain visual confirmation. Weight gain occurs rather gradually. You don’t wake up with a spare tire. Rather, it slowly inflates over the months and years. Without pictures, literal snapshots in time, we might never notice how much we’ve changed or how much weight we’ve gained. Place the best picture you can find next to your worst current one. If they’re digital, print them out in the largest size you can handle. Gaze at them. Take them in. Allow yourself to be shocked, way down deep. Of course, the way you look isn’t everything, and aging, along with it’s inevitable decline, is natural, but this can nevertheless be an eye-opening exercise.
Thrust yourself into situations that you instinctively shirk from.
In order to experience sensations or witness events that might spur change, we have to put ourselves in situations that potentially contain those sensations or events. One reason why some people who get overweight or depressed or stuck in a health rut stay there and never get better is because they live an isolated existence. They don’t leave the house, they go straight home from work, they refuse invitations to go out. It’s not about lack of physical activity; it’s about maintaining a staid life that removes any potential for confounders. And when you’re looking for an event to precipitate massive change in your life, confounding variables are precisely what you need most. If you never leave the house, you’ll never catch that random glance of your own reflection in the store window from a terrible angle. You’ll never run into the former classmate-turned-fitness model who makes you reevaluate your lifestyle. So go out with friends. Go on a long grueling hike and note how far you’ve fallen. Try on clothes. Hit the outdoor gymnasium where all the fit people work out. Put yourself in uncomfortable situations that have the potential to turn your life around.
The reality is that it may be next to impossible to plan and engineer your tipping point. What you can do, though, is put yourself in a position to provoke an emotional response, and be ready for it when it comes (by marshaling resources, accruing knowledge, and keeping an open mind).
What’s reassuring about all this is that the hard part is reaching the tipping point. It’s going to be an unpleasant, visceral, jarring sensation (by definition, it has to be), but that will soon be over. And then change begins. The wild ride ensues, and you just get to guide it and let it happen.
So, readers, what was your personal tipping point? What was the straw that broke the camel’s back, leading the poor beast to dump his saddlebags full of grains and refined sugar and begin taking vitamin D supplements (cause, you know, broken back indicates poor bone mineral density indicates poor vitamin D status)? Also, what led up to that tipping point – is there anything you specifically did to make it happen, or was it just all chance?
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Posted By: Mark Sisson
Thanks for this article! I think that the doctor’s office could be a tipping point for some people, but many doctors are reluctant to say much to patients until they think it’s time to prescribe medications. Especially for women, that might not happen until after menopause.
For me, the tipping point that brought me to primal was desperation. I was miserable and willing to try anything. I was even willing to consider the radical proposition that fats were my friend and grains were not! I’m so glad I did.
Mine was 12 days ago, Thursday, November 3rd. I literally could not stop eating Halloween candy. I compulsively ate almost 2 bags of Fun Size in 3 days before I was so disgusted with myself I knew I needed help.
I’ve known for a long time that I have a love-hate relationship with carbs. Carbs controlled me and I wanted off the sugar high/sugar crash rollercoaster while I still had my “health.” I’ve done yo-yo diets, multilevel marketing cleanse programs, P90X, you name it. I couldn’t stick to anything because I couldn’t control my carb portions. Plus I hate conventional exercise.
I dropped 12 pounds on an 11-day cleanse to fit into my wedding dress in September 2010, proceeded to become very depressed, and gained 25 pounds in fits and spurts since then. I was down to 3 pairs of pants that I could wear to work (I had to do laundry twice a week) and I hated myself and lack of control over what I put in my mouth.
So back to that fateful Thursday. After dumping what was left of the Halloween candy off at a co-worker’s desk, I started researching quitting sugar addiction online, which led me to Potatoes not Prozac, which led me to Paleo, which reminded me of the Primal Blueprint, which I had heard about from two different friends but I thought they were crazy. This time, I was desperate. I downloaded the book immediately and knew as I started to read it that it all MADE SENSE.
I’ve lost 8 pounds since Saturday the 12th (the day I officially gave up grains and legumes) and I’ve never eaten so healthy, had so much energy or felt so good! My pants are starting to fit again, I’m gently working out regularly (only if it’s fun!) and have energy to spare. And the best part: I kicked depression’s @ss without meds! Yeah!! I can’t wait to see where this takes me. My goal is to wear a bikini in public for the first time in my life!
I’ve had two tipping points:
One was pre-pregnancy, when a friend of mine very kindly said, “You’re not allowed to complain about being fat if you’re not going to genuinely try to lose some weight. I know you can do it.” For the first time ever I lost weight, a full 50 lb which I kept off until getting pregnant.
Post-pregnancy, it was deep meditation on what it would mean to live “this way” forever. Never wearing the clothes I wanted to wear, never being part of certain activities, never enjoying another photograph of myself, ever again. A bunch of “nevers” scared the crap out of me.
My tipping point was May 2010. I had come down with atypical walking pneumonia, as well as a sinus infection. I was tired of being sick, tired of getting 3-4 serious sinus infections a year.
I’d put my cat on a grain-free diet earlier that year and it had made a *tremendous* difference to both her coat and her energy levels.
While I was sick I was surfing the Internet and I ran across the site, “Know the Cause” which led me to MDA. Since my cat had done so well going grain-free, I figured, why not try it?
Within two weeks all my seasonal allergies went away. I lost inches — at least half a ring size, 4″ off my waist, etc.
This last year, instead of being sick about once every 6 weeks, I’ve only been sick 3 times. I can’t begin to describe how amazing that is.
Thank you Mark for helping me find such amazing health.
Here’s a tipping point for you: conceive a child.
That was mine. Unfortunately, though my flesh was willing, my mind was ignorant. I stumbled through all sorts of nonsense before I found this blog. And then everything made sense almost overnight.
When you discover the primal lifestyle, I strongly suggest you go whole hog from the get-go. Not 80/20; not cheating on the weekends; but as close to 100% primal as you know how to get. Rip the band-aid of your old lifestyle right off.
That will minimize the discomfort of breaking old habits, and maximize your health results. After a week, I felt better than I had in years. After a month, better than ever before in life. With such results, I have never been tempted to return to old ways. And the rewards just keep on building.
It can work for you just as it did for me!
If you want a word of encouragement from somebody who’s been there, helpful folks are all around on these forums. I too would be happy to lend you an ear. Feel free to contact me at the email address on my blog.
The tipping point for me was watching Lustig’s “Sugar: The Bitter Truth” youtube video. It was nearly instantaneous, over that single hour. Of course I was sort-of looking at a change, before that, or I wouldn’t have taken that much time to watch it. But that video – it all made sense. I stopped eating sugar – weaned myself over about a month and a half, while reading and researching further. And then I landed here, where that change made sense across the entire food spectrum. The weight I lost came off with amazingly little effort (other than the obvious, of course) – but no calorie counting or food weighing or logging, while still eating at restaurants and friends’ houses (just being selective in what I ate there). No change in exercise (I was already working out regularly – at the gym for an hour three times a week, and chasing a child the rest of the time: skating, bowling, bike riding, playing – that hasn’t changed all that much.) My energy is through the roof, I feel great, I have curves now where I had lumpiness before, and I am more alert. I don’t have food cravings or headaches when I miss a meal. I could go on and on…
I want to add that weaning myself from sugar felt like kicking an addiction. Many times I bargained with myself. I would tell myself that I could live without it (candy bar, soda, whatever) for one more minute, and then another. Then an hour. Sometimes I caved and ate what I craved, but after I managed to go a few weeks of being mostly clean, it got much easier. Now, a year later, I still see desserts as if they have a special radioactive glow – they draw my attention. But I can pass them by – it’s just not worth the effort to eat a piece (again, kind of like going on a drunk – it’s just not worth feeling like crap afterwards, and going through dt’s all over again.)
I’m new to Primal, but in the past have lapsed out of motivation because my health and weight have been *good* my whole life; and because a lot of sugary foods are delicious.
I’m looking for improvement with Primal, and thinking of the future, but I’m 6’1″ and have never weighed more than 78kg (172 pounds). I haven’t had any chronic health issues except short sightedness.
I’ve enjoyed what I’ve learned and applied so far, but there seems to be less info on what improvements one can expect when starting from a relatively healthy point. I don’t have 50 pounds to lose, or high blood pressure, or lack energy for sport, or an irritable bowel. My “before” is not a big motivator so far.
When I was 25 I put on a huge amount of weight. For the next 20 years I tried all versions of CW, because we all know that ‘fad’ diets are bad! A few years ago I went on a all inclusive trip to China. After 2 weeks of eating large amounts of fantastic food every day I lost 14lbs. That’s a physical impossibility according to CW. It was enough to start me questioning. I found initial success with low carb and now tend to be primal most of the time. Definitely no wheat either.
My tipping point? Coming up on 53 and my doc said I needed 2 types of medication: blood pressure and cholesterol. I said, “Nope,” and decided to act on what I had been reading. No grains, no sugar. After 4 months I have no need for medication. Yes, I’ve lost about 35 lbs but my motivation is health and that isn’t a number or a date; it’s a life time endeavor.
Thanks, Mark and those of you who contribute to MDA.
My tipping point wasn’t arriving at a bad/dire place but at a very positive one: Realizing that I am worth IT.
(pls define the ‘it’ as you see fit)
I had already lost over 100 lbs following CW and SAD but the insidious side effects of both had started slowly swallowing me again. I had a clear moment of, “This isn’t working anymore and I owe it to myself to find out why. I am worth the time/effort.” That time/effort lead me to the PB and no, there is no going back.
I was breastfeeding my second baby and started loosing more weight than I had gained during the pregnancy. Wanting to keep the momentum going and loose that 50 extra pounds I had gained in the past 15 years, I found a slow-movement strength training facility and personal trainer who introduced me and my husband to Primal Living. So far we are down 20 pounds each and gaining muscle, just by cleaning out the pantry and changing the food we bring into the house (and one 20 minute workout per week.) Now we just need to work harder on fun physical activities, and make eating out more rare.
Tipping point for me must’ve been when my television broke
So i compensated by surfing on the internet all day long while reading information about health and bodybuilding(that’s what i was always into, but never got “time” to educate myself). Seriously, if my tv never broke, I’d still be watching late night conan o’ brien instead of having my evening workouts done. Having adequate diet pushed me forward of course.
For me it was definitely a visit to the doctor for a complete health check up. I went just for a regular check up, I was 28 then, and found out things about myself like I had borderline tryglycerides, I was far more overweight than I told myself I was, I had PCOS.. and all this while I thought I was just merrily chubby, but healthy nonetheless. A health check up is definitely a must do for those who need that extra push in the right direction.
My tipping point was when a person said to me…your child is very healthy (i.e. FAT), same as you.
Wanted to punch his lights out, but I thank him now!!
In my case, the tipping point was slow but sure in coming…When I noticed I had severe bloating, digestive issues after grain and refined carb ingestion, a friend suggested I be tested for Celiac Disease…I was positive I had this..so when the diagnosis was that I was NOT Celiac…I was shocked, frustrated and depressed, as I had noted that avoiding grains kept me feeling good and not having to think about weight…I felt good in my skin…When I listened to the doctor’s advice about going back to whole-grains and gluten “since I had no clinical PROBLEM” with them I immediately began to bloat, have joint pain and put on weight..Finally, I found MDA and the Primal Blueprint…and everything makes sense again..I realize now that I do not need to be celiac to be affected by grains..and that it is important to listen/pay attention to your body and the messages it sends to you..Optimum health?..with the Primal Blueprint and Mark’s fantastic blog…for me it feels like the present..
I didn’t really have a tipping point, as such. It was more like a repurposing of my efforts!
I have always been pretty fit and healthy (luckily), but when a friend told me she was starting a primal diet in August this year, I got really interested. I then lost days to MDA, bought the blueprint, and haven’t looked back. Most of the 10 laws, I was doing already – it was the diet itself that was the revelation.
I didn’t have to reach the bottom to start my way to the top – discovering primal was more like a lightbulb being switched on…
I was in High School and my belly started to grow. My energy levels were down and I decided to do something about my health.
I played a lot of basketball in Junior High and the first two years of High School, but since I’ve turned lazy, the quality of my life decreased. I got back on basketball and added resistance trainings to my regime.
It has been 3 1/2 years and I’ve realized that fitness is a life long commitment.
I hope you guys get that too.
Simpler yet: If you are old enough to be able to tell the difference between what’s good for you and what’s not, you know what to do. Get on with it.
For me, I knew I had a slight weight problem for a few years, (30-40 pounds over weight). I had been “trying to lose weight through exercising but nothing was working until my father commented on my big weight gain when I was approximately 26 or so (30 now), I was soo unbelieveably angry with him and myself. He put it bluntly but that triggered a powerful emotional response. I got very angry, I went and joined the gym and got extremely eggressive with barbells/cross trainers/went balls out at whatever exercise I was doing and lost like 20 pounds in the space of 3 weeks. For me I still channel that anger now through my workouts it helps me lift heavier, run faster, do better than previously. When i’m annoyed about something and/or stressed about work, I know i’m gonna have a pretty intense workout that I will just own that barbell! Anger is the way to go to keep me focused when I need to make gains whether that be people doubting my ability, just need a kickstart sometimes!!
Mine was the old “sick and tired of being sick and tired” way back in my late twenties. I lost a hundred pounds. After raising a family, years later, I was back in that place, dxd with diabetes, scared to death of turning out like my relatives and my DOCTOR suggested low carb. The light bulb turned back on. I’m doing it with whole foods and resistance exercise this time. MDA is a wonderful guide.
the long and winding road started for me the year after my youngest kid was born…I weighed more 1 year after her birth than I did the day after! Same scale, same midwife’s office, more weight! UGH. started exercising regularly, but weight did not drop until I went low carb (Atkins, at my parents suggestion). I kept it off for 2 years, then started graduate school, then my father got sick and passed away…the weight came back! I knew low carb was the only way for me, but it took much longer the second time to lose…now I’ve found Primal, but mostly lost the weight over the previous few years- but I can KEEP IT OFF! feels effortless, and less gym time! woo hoo – more time for hobbies.
I should mention I am 48 years old, so all of the above happened from age 38 until now. I feel better now than I have in all those years. dont let ANY excuse(age, children, obligations) get in your way. I’d also like to mention my joints are no longer enlarged, I wake up without pain, my cycle is regular, I walk faster than my teenage son, and people COMMENT that I look young and have I lost weight..LOL! Thanks Mark, Carrie (we know a good woman is behind every good man!) & MDA people!
LONG ago (1980s) I read an article (in Cosmo? Shape?) entitled “Romancing the Jolt.” It riffed off of the Jolted Sober/Jolted Lean stuff. The idea is the same as Mark’s — you CAN prime yourself for that jolt, the “click” where it all falls into place, the energy to make a radical change. I’ve returned to it over the years when I knew I had to do something about my excess fat/lack of muscle.
What I know now is that the jolt MUST be subsequently supported by a sustainable lifestyle. Primal works. But anyone can use the Mark’s tips to give that extra rocket-blast that makes the trip so much fun.
For myself, there really wasn’t an AHA! moment so much. A friend had lost lots of weight and had many health problems remedy themselves eating Primal. At the time, my DH was having precipitous drops in energy at 10 am and everything I had been doing to try to lose my steadily increasing weight the CW way wasn’t working. I thought that there was no reason not to try it. If the only thing it did was give my husband more energy than it was worth it.
Not only has it done that but at the age of 65 he has dropped almost thirty pounds in four months.
My tipping point came when I hit 212lbs and had the energy levels of a middle aged man (I’m only 25). I was finding it hard to motivate myself into doing anything physical, even the most basic of tasks. I was also getting sick a lot with frequent colds.
So one day I watched this documentary “fat head”, which was about how a low carb, high fat diet is better than how we currently eat. The film made me remember that my brother had been on the Paleo diet, which is a similar concept.
So I bought a few books and started cold turkey. I had one final “hurrah” day where I ate junk food all day and started fresh on a Tuesday. I’m about 2 1/2 months in and have already lost 20lbs!
My tipping point was actually a very vain one. I was asked to be in my friend’s wedding party and I didn’t want to be the ‘fat’ bridesmaid. I also turned 25 this year and was tired of hating what I saw in the mirror.
I’ve been attempting my best to be primal since April of this year, and what started as a vapid attempt to lose weight turned into a lifestyle change for the better!
360˚ mirror.
Enough said.
I hiked the Pacific Crest Trail. During the hike, I developed “hiker hunger” like anybody else who hikes long distance. Bottomless, unceasing hunger due to a daily calorie deficit. I gained back all the weight I lost afterward (the trail is 2663 miles.) I was trying to lose the weight through diet and exercise but the hiker hunger had returned. It brought me to tears. I sat there over one last dry salad thinking I can’t go on with this unsatiable hunger. I saw a video where a nice Swedish doctor said if I ate lots of butter and cream I could calm my hunger. I tried it and the hunger went away instantly.
Mark! You have moved into my head lately…how to eat more veggies, tipping point, healthfulness in nature. How’d you do that?!
A couple years ago I started to pull-the-plug on my sedentary bulls***. Seeing a photo of myself on a hike STUNNED me out of denial. Holding a friends hand while his 24 y.o. daughter died from a horse accident. Watching my mom crutch around when a she used to be vision of strength. Having to bury my 63 y.o. dad, after he battled 4 years of the effects of diabetes, cancer.
So I finally took that surfing class I’d been dreaming of for 20 yrs. I took that trapeze class too. And when I noticed that protein, meat protein, seemed to help my migraines, yet I INSISTED on being vegetarian….denial couldn’t live here anymore.
And when I went looking for further confirmation of my suspicions, guess what came up every time I did an internet search.
MDA
I feel like there is a blues song in this somewhere. Or a country song! haha
Thanks Mark and MDA’ers — you folks lay down an awesome path of support every day. Love it.
My tipping point was coming for several years but I continually headed it off at the pass. Ten years ago I was at a good weight, for me, I am very petite, and possibly an OK body fat %. My approach to low carb was the Zone which is too low in fat. In my early 30s after several years of doing the Zone I one day stopped sleeping, this was after having adult acne for several years also a sign of an endocrine/hormonal imbalance but back then I couldn’t put the pieces together. I went on the birth control pill which caused me to become estrogen dominant while continuing my version of low carb primal…A few years later I joined a gym and gained a few pounds, started eating red meat but then a year and a half later managed to lose the 5 lbs and another 5 leaving me in an underweight condition. I once again stopped sleeping well and turned to weekly wine and pizza to cope. I continued to eat red meat and walked but my calories were too low and protein intake not high enough etc. Last fall one day when putting on my skinny jeans I caught a glimpse and realized wow, maybe I’m gaining body fat. This past summer the tipping point finally arrived when I learned I’d become skinny fat, with a super low weight and super high body fat %. Am still reeling from the shock to some extent.