Mirror, Mirror on the Wall
Yesterday I shared the desire to “look good naked” among my reasons for living Primally. A few readers seconded the logic. Though the point was in good fun, it wasn’t in jest. At 56 and counting, I happily take pride in my appearance. Although there’s a lot more to my life and self-confidence than appearance, I enjoy looking as dynamic as I feel. Although some might see the sentiment as vain, I’ll wholeheartedly stand by it. Although some might cry vanity at any focus on appearance (like my top ten admission), the wordsmiths say it’s more accurately “excessive pride” in one’s looks. But then, is one person’s perception of “excessive” the same as another’s? Is it a matter of kind, degree, or aim? We might balk at someone’s attention to perfect clothes or hair, but what about the same dedication to a great body?
Here in our MDA corner, we tend to focus on the strength, vitality and health parts of the PB. The Primal Blueprint book is similarly directed. I’d venture to say, however, that in the midst of these higher aims, all of us still want to LGN (look good naked). Are we all vain? Are we, in fact, hiding behind the façade of health and wellness when all we really want is to admire our incredible reflections in the full-length mirror while we dance around in our skivvies?
I think many of us would simply put that pleasure in context: health first, appearance – well, a welcome but secondary motivation. But what about others in our community who would put looks squarely if not solely on top? They might be as committed, meticulous, and enthusiastic as a PBer working his/her way off insulin. Would any of us begrudge these folks their choice to view the PB chiefly as a means to an aesthetic end? And for our collective self-inquiry, are we entirely honest about our own regard for the aesthetic benefits?
The truth is, some of us might cringe at any “ripped” or “shredded” talk, putting it in the same jokey category as “buns of steel.” For some with a more traditional, modest style, the language can feel embarrassing or even unseemly. In fact, many people have felt at home with the PB because we talk about this aspect (and these images) relatively infrequently. But for many of us, particularly those who spent time in the bodybuilding or other hardcore fitness realm (and maybe still keep one foot in that arena), the language rings true and feels richly motivating. We might relish each subtle uptick in leg muscle tone. We might be gratified by the graceful lines of a lean, taut torso. We might take significant pride in the developing curves of our shoulders and arms. We love what the PB does for our body composition, allowing us to hone and maintain the attractive, “cut” physique we’ve always aimed for.
A great body reflects great health, you might say. The end result of the PB, of course, encompasses both benefits – whether we intend it/appreciate it or not. Six-pack abs can comfortably accompany a good glucose reading. A tight caboose can be the perfect complement to healthy blood pressure or resting heart rate. The fact that the PB offers serious aesthetic advantages doesn’t diminish its credibility as a health paradigm. Just as we all settle into our own Primal practice, maybe we all carve out our own vantage point in the Primal Blueprint rationale itself. There’s room in the tent for all of us – wherever we’ve chosen to place ourselves.
So, is looking good reason enough to do the PB? Absolutely, I’d say. More power to anyone so intentioned. Nonetheless, don’t expect to see the health news and commentary dry up here any time soon. The pursuit of wellness and vitality will always be the heart of the Blueprint and MDA, however it dovetails (or doesn’t) with more “outward” achievements. Funny thing, that old beer ad comes to mind now – the one with two sides shouting at each other in a competition between “tastes great” and “less filling.” A tongue-in-cheek but apt comparison, I think. In the Primal Blueprint realm, isn’t it great you don’t have to choose?
What’s your take on the aesthetic pursuit of the PB? Where would you say you are on the appearance-health spectrum in your Primal commitment?
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Posted By: Mark Sisson
I don’t want to say I judge people who are heavy or obese. (Like someone said above, we either consciously or subconsciously size each other up.) However, in the back of my mind I say to the overweight person…”you don’t have to look like that…you can look like me…and it’s very easy”. Again, I don’t judge and I wish I could personally help everyone get fit, but it’s up to each individual to make the choice. I enjoy looking as good as I eat and feel, it’s a biproduct for the work and dedication to the lifestyle I chose.
“So, is looking good reason enough to do the PB? Absolutely, I’d say”
I can’t agree at all.
Surely how one feels sans a mirror (mirrors…water and ice aside are a new thing in evol.)is of primary importance.
I’ve met many folks who look fantabulous with a , from their estimation,a far less reduced quality of mind than their level of appearance.
I’m guessing Grok didn’t wax or shave. Isn’t body hair part of being primal?
Totally agree kevinl, it drives me mad when people expect me to shave or wax all the time.
Also agree. That male model above does not have a hair on him!
The most important thing about becoming healthier is the fact you are making a necessary change in order to improve the possibility of a longer life. Even if people workout just to look good it still is getting back to basics of being healthy and energetic. Looking good influences how you feel about yourself, your perception of what others think about you, and the way you carry yourself. Looks are a byproduct of the work we put into ourselves. The dedication required in regulating what you eat, how often do you work out, how you work out are all integral to the common goal of being healthier and creating a better inage of ourselves to ourselves. We do this for various reasons but it all comes back to living longer and maximizing our potential.
Besides it is human nature to size each other up. It’s a primal thought process to look and judge other people. We do this for breeding, relationships, in case of a situation occurs where we have to use our fight or flight mechanism. It’s natural and has been this way for millions of years. Previously size mattered. The bigger someone was the more likelty they were to survive. In the early 70s through the 90s people wanted mass but now our perceptions have changed to where the lean, agile hunter/gatherer is what people strive for b/c we can adapt to various situations. We aren’t as limited due to lack of flexibility or speed.
Ladies: My mom told me you only strive for a perfect body to be better than the other girls. I say, “Awesome! Whatever it takes.” PS…While you’re working to “out do” Karen, the hottie from your Yoga class that’s stealing your attention from the steamy Personal Trainer dudes, don’t forget dead-lifts. They’re GREAT for your legs and bunz. Trust me, Karen will notice and she WILL be jealous.
Guys: Please continue thinking your beer belly is cool…it totally is. And remember, you shouldn’t care what other people think of you…so feel free to let yourself go. You only live once so their is no time to worry about eating healthily. Also, keep telling yourself that women aren’t physical creatures, that they’re only attracted to smart, funny and rich guys that make them feel good and secure. Looks don’t matter.
Besides, those gym rats and health nuts are just a bunch of sissy boys anyways.
Now…I’ll be up in the gym workin’ on my fitness and, if only the ladies and gents can follow my aforementioned guidelines, I’ll have less competition and more fish to choose from.
But I digress…It’s not vanity and it sure a hell isn’t excessive pride or insecurity….it’s human nature. And anyone denying this simple fact is insecure or is named Oprah, struggling with weight-loss and “looking good nakedness”.
Sorry, I’ll be pining away in front of the mirror Narcissus style thinking, “Damn, you are one lucky mirror”……and you can be a regular at home depot, replacing broken mirrors every week.
John S – I think it is pretty clear we humans have become a domesticated version of the originally wild human being. Today’s humans are like a cat that is stuck in the house all day with nothing to do but eat for entertainment. By making everything in our lives so incredibly convenient, we have forgotten what it is to MOVE FOR LIFE. Unfortunately, my cats have not forgotten the need to move for life and sacraficed my furniture as punishment.
Absolutely, and the consumption of grains, high quantity refined sugars and other nasties only makes the process that much worse (I know that my dogs don’t want to eat crunchy compressed bits of corn gluten and wheat middlings). I think most people miss the fact that muscle tissue is itself a plastic form of nutrition storage for both amino acids and caloric value. During famine, muscle tissue is metabolized at the same rate or greater than fat tissue. There is no need to carry around a bloated belly to survive relatively short and occasional lean periods. Humans don’t hibernate, so in the long run that kind of famine endurance would be maladaptive.
Indeed. Look at the pictures in Weston Price’s Nutrition and Physical Degeneration. The people are almost always handsome. When their food is replaced with sugars and grains, they become ugly.
“Being sexy is a full-time job, and there ain’t NO vacation or overtime pay.”
More attractive people, all else equal, are favored in many aspects of life. Reference this CNN article http://money.cnn.com/2005/04/08/news/funny/beautiful_money/ which states that good-looking/slim people earn 5% more than their counterparts.
But who needs studies in this department… few would choose a bulky/sickly look compared to a toned/tan/muscular look given the choice. Sure, maybe an NFL offensive lineman, but it helps their job (to a point) to be as bulky as possible! Most people have trouble with the consistent effort required to get the end result, but the PB makes it easy. The details of a motivation are irrelevant… but striving to look good naked is certainly a fair choice!
To me, it’s all about addiction. Some people are addicted to foods, behaviors, thoughts and emotions that make them look “good” (totally subjective term, anyone who’s traveled knows that fat men in poor countries are the most highly sought after) and others are addicted to foods, behaviors, thoughts and emotions that make them look “bad”. My goal is to be free of these addictions period. A lot of buff, skinny people are certainly trying to relive the glory days and hang on to their 16 year old bodies while on the inside they are empty and repress unpleasant feelings through exercise, diet and looking in the mirror. They may be highly developed in terms of diet and exercise but rather retarded when it comes to emotional health. In “unhealthy” people, perhaps their interior issues are more transparent or maybe they’re actually secure enough in themselves that they don’t need to be tan and buff.
Beauty is culturally relative (duh). My goal is to be as healthy as I can be…in all ways…and to see the beauty in all things…including the ugly, the fat and infirm.
“What’s your take on the aesthetic pursuit of the PB? Where would you say you are on the appearance-health spectrum in your Primal commitment?”
On a scale of 1 to 10, a 7 in favor of health. Your wife is my role model and inspiration. I felt depressed upon turning 40 and put on ten pounds that I’ve finally shed thanks to going low-carb. When I see your wife in a bikini, I realize it’s possible for women to look hot even into their 50s if they stay fit and lean. Aging cannot be avoided completely but it can be slowed by decades through primal living. You and Carrie are visible proof of that!
Hmmmm. This was an interesting topic. I think for most of us it is seeing a picture of ourselves where we are just plain fat or the doctor keeps upping our blood pressure meds. Eventually you’ve gotta get back in balance.
I used to think that the women on the cover of triathlete magazine looked great. Then I started to notice how thin they really were, gaunt in some cases but with good definition in the arms. They became a lot less of a role model for how I’d want to look. I want to look like a surfer girl, not a marathoner.
The truth is that the first thing you lose when you drop bodyfat to the level of elite fitness models is your BOOBS. So, in terms of weighing in, I’d rather keep some boobs and not be a size zero in jeans with no ass either. I find it hard to believe that Grok would be in favor of a too lean woman. As Bloodhound Gang says “Hooray for Boobies!”
You don’t want the booty to be too juicy… but just juicy enough.
TrailGrrl
Too Right! Carrie is an amazing inspiration (as is Mark). I too am 40 (and none too happy about it) and have put on substantial weight. I’m old enough to know that the health is what is truly important but I’d be lying if I said that it was my main motivation.
I want to look great again!!!!!!!!! I want my wonderful (and fit) husband to look at me and go “Grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!” and to glow with pride when we are out together. (He loves me and does tell me I’m beautiful but I’d like to actually believe him).
I would no longer do something I know is truly unhealthy to achieve this but I do want to achieve it. I want to look in the mirror and be proud of what I see. I don’t think there is anything wrong or unusual or unnatural about this. I also think that if we were truly honest with ourselves most of us would realise this is a big part of our motivation.
I honestly think that the reason I don’t look my best now is that I wasn’t valuing myself much. I think that is the reason why most people are overweight (medical conditions aside) and unhealthy. If you value something you treat it well do you not? If looking good is a by product of valuing ourselves, how can that possibly be bad?????
PS. Primal eating hasn’t helped me lose any weight yet so I’m frustrated but still having faith, and tweaking amounts, exercise, adherence, etc. to find my best balance. Fingers crossed. I know I could lose weight with CW (I have before) but I know it will come back and I think this is a healthier way to reach my aesthetic goals!
I believe it’s all about balance. There are only so many hours. Time spent on improving your looks needs to be balanced against time spent with your family, time spent improving your knowledge, time spent exercising your ability to empathise, time spent to unwind & have fun, etc etc
Ironically the best way to live is what most people nowadays don’t have the patience for or get bored with, always wanting fastest, biggest, smallest, most expensive, highest status, etc
When I was younger, it was about looks (possibly to attract a mate). Now that I’m 42, it’s about health. I want to (and expect to) live to 110, in good health.
But, being healthy PB style means looking good. A great secondary benefit!
It’s a fundamental point Mark makes and nothing wrong with it – a well honed humand body is a sight for anyone to be proud of!
Andrea – At only 23, I think I could also agree that the balance shifts as you get older. But this is probably a relationship thing not an age thing. I remember that prior to meeting my long term girlfriend, my health and fitness efforts were definitely more looks focussed. Makes sense based on the human desire to find a mate I suppose..
When I saw Mark and Carrie I was amazed. Absolutely floored.
I did not find this sight or the principles of PB until I had been being treated by my ND for various GI issues without complete success. I decided to skip all grains and just see how I felt.
It was instantaneous!! One of the most incredible fixes of my life. So, I started cruising the Internet to learn what I had “stumbled upon” by skipping grains, and if do so was healthy long term.
So, I’m reading and learning and all, and feeling wayyyy better than I had in over a year, and then I saw Carrie. *I almost laughed out loud at how beautiful she is, it was that incredible.*
What an inspiration to we older women. There’s plenty of inspiration out there for the younger crowd, but far less for us reaching upper 40′s and beyond. We start to believe that feeling and looking awful is the norm, the way it has to be.
Carrie’s example gives mid-life women so much more to hope for. I’d love to hear from her exactly how she applies PB.
Sandra
I agree. I am also 40+ and I have had 3 children. I would love to hear from Carrie how she manages to look so beautiful. I have had major problems with my stomach wanting to stay swollen all the time. It is also the only place where fat keeps depositing if I am not constantly working out and exhausting myself. I have been on the primal diet for two weeks now and was doing well, and then all of a sudden my stomach is swollen again in the last two days (not hormonal). This never happened before I had children. I am at a complete loss as to why I am lean and muscular everywhere except when my stomach wants have have its moments that can last for weeks.
I liked how I looked in the mirror *before* I started losing weight; I looked like one of those Rubenesque nudes in a Renaissance painting. I recently lost 20lbs and gained some muscle after finding a sport I love and counting calories, CW style. I still like how I look naked – different, but still good – but what’s new and what I LOVE is feeling strong, feeling those hard toned muscles under my remaining fat, and using those muscles to their capacity.
I just found PB and I’m excited about trying it – for health, for hunger management, for strength, and for losing maybe a bit more fat – though I never want to look like the chick in that pic above.
Checkout Rich Roll for a world class physique.
I need some help!!! Could some one tell me why Im not looseing the weight as fast as I was…Im 5’3″ and I was 191Lb now Im 173 its been 3 weeks since I went primal,Iam muscler but I still have to much body fat,130Lbs is perfect for my body type. I dont know what to do,Im only taking in abot 20 to 30carbs per day and Im working out”sprints and weights and crunches.Is this normal to stop looseing after 3 weeks?? and should I agust my diet and how??? Please some one I need help!!!
Williams Carlos Williams on dancing naked in front of a mirror, lumps and all:
http://poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15539
As a 25 year old, who was never thin except in his childhood, looking good now and having the feeling (and ability) to do anything, just by choosing to do so, is the main reason I have started this path. Still not like the guy in the pic (i hope to be by the end of the year though), and have quite a few belly fat to lose, but still, being more attractive and healthy is my main reason. Any other person my age who says different, I would be pretty inclined to say they’re fooling themselves.