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13 Sep

Have a Picnic. Win a Cow. The 2011 Grokfeast Challenge.

It’s cow time. US Wellness has long been a favorite meat spot for MDA readers. A couple years ago they donated pemmican and the popular 5 gallon bucket of fat. Last year they went whole hog. And by hog, I mean cow. And they’re doing it again this year. US Wellness has generously offered up a cow to the winners of today’s contest, the Grokfeast Challenge.

For those of you with raised eyebrow, they won’t actually be delivering a mooing, cud chewing, udder dangling live cow to your doorstep. But you will receive the delicious meat that once was that cow. And I’m not just talking about a bucket of chuck. The winners will receive sirloin, brisket, short ribs, back ribs, rib-eye steaks, T-bone steaks, NY strip steaks, Delmonico steaks, filets, bottom round roasts, center cut roasts, chuck, tongue, liver, heart, kidney, beef tallow, marrow bones, beef stock, and an oxtail. Hundreds of pounds of bovine, all grass fed, grass finished, totaling somewhere in the region of $1600 in retail value. Check out this Grass Fed Goodness video where you can watch your prize/meal grazing around in sweet Missouri pastures. And if you haven’t already hit up the US Wellness blog and newsletter, do it now to be the first to learn of sales, discounts and promotional offers. Speaking of promotional offers, use promo code: uswmeats at U.S. Wellness to get a 15% discount on any order under 40 lbs (excludes sale items, volume discounts and bulk boxes). The code is active until October 31.

But winning won’t be easy. It’ll take work. And friends…

To Win the Cow, Host a Grokfeast

What’s a Grokfeast? It’s a picnic! A Primal Picnic. It involves three things:

  • People: At least eight.
  • A Feast: Food for those people. Primal food.
  • A Primal Activity: Fun for those people. Primal fun.

What exactly constitutes “Primal fun?” Any group form of Primal Play could work, like Ultimate Frisbee, a group hike, or Grok Tag. But less traditional options are welcomed as well. Maybe your group wants to shop a farmers’ market before the feast, or build the picnic table you eat the feast on, or host the feast on top of Half Dome. The idea is to capture the Primal spirit. Because going Primal doesn’t have to be a solo operation. Health isn’t a man alone on a treadmill; it’s a group of people enjoying each other’s company, eating healthy food, and maybe breaking a little sweat.

Check out last year’s winning Grokfeast, and all the rest for ideas:

How to Enter the Contest…

Other than having a great time, you’ll need to email me a few of your Grokfeast highlights. For a valid entry, the following are required…

  1. A list of participants. There’s no upper limit, but the minimum is eight.
  2. A list of dishes made for the feast and one recipe of one of those dishes (preferably the tastiest).
  3. Photos of the Grokfeast, including at least one group shot, one shot of the feast, one shot of the recipe dish, and one shot of your Primal activity. Of course, you aren’t limited to four photos. The more pics you send us, the better!
  4. A summary of the day. Tell us how it all went down, did something taste great? Taste awful? What was your Primal activity? Was it enjoyable? A complete failure? Did hilarity ensue? Must be at least two paragraphs. Can easily be more. But use brevity to your advantage. Writing a 15,000 word summary won’t give you a better chance at winning than someone who writes a single, well written, entertaining page.
  5. OPTIONAL: Video of the Grokfeast. It’s not required, but certainly couldn’t hurt.

Finally, be creative! Other than keeping it Primal, there are no limitations on how to have your picnic. Did you convince your entire group to go barefoot? Did you make up your own Primal hunting/gathering game? Is your main dish a Grok-shaped meat cake? Did you have one final water balloon fight before the cold set in? Did you realize the cold had already set in and shivered miserably while building a campfire (to cook your meat on)? Did someone trap, skin, and cure a wild boar hide to use as a picnic blanket? Okay, that might be a little extreme.

But there really aren’t too many restrictions on how to do this. Whether during the day or night, by the ocean or on the roof of a parking garage, at a park, or even in Milwaukee, the possibilities are endless. And it’s not a numbers game. With coworkers, gym buddies, your college dorm cluster, eight people or eighty, the winner isn’t the group with the most people, but the group that throws the coolest Grokfeast. If your friends are all busy, remember there’s a forum filled with other Primal folks who might be in your area.

Once you’ve had your fun and gathered up the evidence, email it to me.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Include “Grokfeast Submission” in the subject line of your email. I receive hundreds of emails a day. If the subject line isn’t correct, there’s a chance I may miss your submission entirely. You can attach pictures or Word docs to the email. If you made a video, please include a link to the YouTube or Vimeo page.

Deadline for Submission:

October 3, midnight, Pacific Standard Time. That’s right, less than three weeks away. I said it wasn’t easy, so hustle!

How a Winner is Chosen:

While I’m not sure how many entries I’ll end up receiving, I’m going to try to publish as many as I can, if not all of them. Entries will be posted during the Reader-Created Content Week, the week of Oct. 3. Semi-finalists will be chosen by me and the Worker Bees later that week. Readers will then have a chance to vote on their favorite. The winner will be announced by the end of the Challenge, Oct. 11.

Fine Print:

  1. The beef will be shipped to one address. It is up to the participants to divide the beef up however they choose (and for those of you thinking about hoarding the beef and not telling your other participants, keep in mind your Grokfeast will be published live on a blog that gets millions of page views a month. They might find out.).
  2. Cow prize not available to residents outside the U.S.. In the event of a non-US team winning, a prize of equal value will be sent as substitute.
  3. Cow prize is not a living, breathing cow. It is a large quantity (over 200 lbs) of various meats that represent most of the edible parts of a cow.
  4. MDA reserves the right to publish any or all material submitted. MDA also reserves the right to make edits to any videos submitted.
  5. Only one entry per group. Only one person needs to submit the entry. That person will be used as the sole contact for establishing shipping/delivery details of the winning prize.
  6. I will be encouraging the winning team to hold a second meet-up for the cow delivery. I want to see all that meat being doled out and enjoyed!
  7. Depending on the number of entries, I reserve the right to adjust how and when the entries will be published and/or voted on. All rules subject to change.

To track all the contests visit the 2011 Primal Blueprint 30-Day Challenge Contest Page for daily updates.

You want comments? We got comments:

Imagine you’re George Clooney. Take a moment to admire your grooming and wit. Okay, now imagine someone walks up to you and asks, “What’s your name?” You say, “I’m George Clooney.” Or maybe you say, “I’m the Clooninator!” You don’t say “I’m George of George Clooney Sells Movies Blog” and you certainly don’t say, “I’m Clooney Weight Loss Plan”. So while spam is technically meat, it ain’t anywhere near Primal. Please nickname yourself something your friends would call you.

  1. did this last year with some random colo primals who never met before. We had such an awesome time! and the food was glorious.
    would gladly do that again!

    peggy wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Hey Peggy. I’m going to try to get some primals here in Denver together from the Denver Paleo meetup. Join the group or shoot me an email if you want to come down and join us. I’m thinking October 1st.

      Peggy The Primal Parent wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • thanks for invite! I’m sadly out of town that wknd (not too sad – as on a cruise). all my wknds are “booked” b4 deadline… might have to do my own local week-night thang, or pass on this one.

        peggy wrote on September 13th, 2011
  2. Sweet, I can’t wait!

    I order my lard from Wellness Meats, the entire content of the bucket smells like grass :-)

    Arty wrote on September 13th, 2011
  3. V cool. Gonna be hell trying to organize this with my friends haha

    Zach wrote on September 13th, 2011
  4. Damn! I have no primal friends.

    Anyone in the Phoenix area want to host a Grokfest for me to attend?

    Kelly wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Yes! But we’ll need to figure out where…

      I’m kind of new in town (moved from Tucson ~2mos ago for a job) so I need suggestions! At least the weather’s making a turn for the better so far this month.

      I don’t have many friends in town either, mostly just my fiancee.

      Uncephalized wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • I am also new to Phoenix, and would love to join in a Grokfest!

        Melissa wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • I have no idea where for anything really – I just started primal so recently that I haven’t really begun to explore options. I know there are lots of local parks and stuff – but that’s about the sum of my knowledge!

        Kelly wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Yes, Phoenix here as well. Ready and willing.

      Artur wrote on September 13th, 2011
  5. Sounds like fun! Hopefully the weather will hold out!

    Hal wrote on September 13th, 2011
  6. While I am not eligible to win “your” cow, as I live in Canada, I just wanted to share that I just bought half of my own cow, as well as half a lamb and half a pig….all from a local farm down the road from me, all grown and raised naturally and without drugs. I now have a freezer full of beef, chicken and lamb, just waiting to be eaten all year! It’s awesome…

    I actually saw my cow at our local fair as it was being auctioned off (it was a steer raised to be sold for meat), so took a picture of my cow so I could honour it at the first feast. I will do a Grokfeast with my friends using my wonderful local animals to be in the spirit of the event, and wish everyone else good luck with the contest!!

    Janine wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • I am also in Canada, whereabouts are you? Where did you find your meat? I have been looking for a practical way to get large quantities of grassfed beef, chicken etc in the Southern Ontario/Toronto area

      tgreen wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Where in Canada are you? I’m in Vancouver. Bought a cow share recently in order to get raw milk…it’s great! But now I own part of a live cow! Would be happy to share if you’re in the area.

      Suzanne wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • Hi there Tgreen and Suzanne. I am in the Victoria area, and my co-worker lives near a farmer in Saanich who raises the sheep and chickens, the pig is from a farm in Sooke and a kid from Saanich raised the cow! Sorry…a bit fair from Tgreen for sure, and being on the island also makes it difficult for Suzanne. Good luck in finding a local farmer to buy from!

        Janine wrote on September 14th, 2011
        • Also on the Island Janine. We had a Grokfeast with my family on a campout- literally roasted steaks over an open fire on a stick! It was SO much fun..the pictures didn’t turn out so great as it was nearly dark. Anyhow, I am trying to find Island sources of meat, beef, pork,lamb and chickens so if you have any time could you let me know your contacts? I would appreciate it!

          Heidi wrote on September 21st, 2011
      • I don’t know if I posted this in the right spot but I was trying to reply to Suzanne. I am in Snohomish and would love to help with your cow. (sounds weird, huh?) Anyway, I have a friend I see almost weekly that lives in Surrey. Maybe we can make something work out.

        Frank wrote on September 14th, 2011
  7. Wow… I don’t have many friends that are primal, but maybe this would be a good intro to primal for them! I do have friends that love to eat cow 😉

    Salad Maggie wrote on September 13th, 2011
  8. That is such a good prize! Too bad I don’t live in the US…:-)

    Anna wrote on September 13th, 2011
  9. Hey.. anyone in the NJ, NY area want to work together on this?

    Lauren W. wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • I’m in NYC and would love to meet some primal folks in the area!

      Kelsey wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • me, me!

        markodarko wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • My wife and I are in! We live in Nyack.

      Jeff wrote on September 16th, 2011
      • Hey guys, I’m gonna start a thread in the forum under the Meet and Greet section for NYCers that want to do a picnic :) hope to see you there!

        KS wrote on September 17th, 2011
  10. Such a good idea!

    Francesca wrote on September 13th, 2011
  11. I so want to do this! But I don’t have primal peeps in the area. Would love to work with anyone in CT or the New England area! :)

    WinkBlu wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Where in CT? I am in Ridgefield, Fairfield county, by New York border…

      Sean wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • Southeastern CT, right near the RI border.

        WinkBlu wrote on September 13th, 2011
        • Stratford, CT, here. And I’ve got another Primal buddy in Norwalk…

          RagingZen wrote on September 13th, 2011
        • All the CT primals, here is my email address sdsims1972 @ gmail . com Give me a shout and let’s see if we can get something going!

          Sean wrote on September 13th, 2011
        • What’s your email address? I’ll add you to our planning list. Just email me –

          (This goes out to anyone in or close to CT)

          AngryBadger wrote on September 14th, 2011
      • I’m in Norwalk, CT – but am friends with RagingZen, who’s in Stratford. We’ll pretty much travel anywhere semi-close. Let’s make this happen!

        I’ll make primal chilli :)

        AngryBadger wrote on September 14th, 2011
  12. Woot! I’m doing a paleo challenge with the kettlebell girls from my Crossfit gym and I think this would be a fun addition to the challenge!

    Christine M. wrote on September 13th, 2011
  13. I’d love to help organize a Grokfeast in Albuquerque/Santa Fe. We can grok with the best of them. Who’s with me?

    DesertTomte wrote on September 13th, 2011
  14. What a fabulous idea!

    I’m in the UK so can’t participate but happy feasting everyone else :-)

    Tara Stevens wrote on September 13th, 2011
  15. I’m going to have to find / make some primal-minded friends near Salt Lake City…

    PrimalJack wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • My husband and I are in Salt Lake City!!!!!!!!!! :) And we don’t have other Primal friends. And we want to feast!

      Jen wrote on September 14th, 2011
  16. NYC Groks, ACTIVATE!! let’s knock our skulls together and get this done RIGHT!!!
    -marko in brooklyn (markvsqz @ gmail . com)

    markodarko wrote on September 13th, 2011
  17. I’m in Cleveland, Ohio looking for people to participate. I posted on the nutrition forum under the name “June”. Check it out!

    June wrote on September 13th, 2011
  18. Sure you can’t send a cow to Guatemala? We’re making plans to make this possible…

    Abigaillyn wrote on September 13th, 2011
  19. This is so awesome! One question, can Groklings (kids, babies, toddlers) count as some of the 8 people?

    Jessica S. wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Sure!

      Mark Sisson wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • Cool! We know at least one other family in for 30 days, I know how we’ll be picnicing now!

        APRYL wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Groklings! I luv it!

      Michele wrote on September 13th, 2011
  20. Last years entries looked like so much fun I regretted not doing it myself. This year I am in! My creative juices are starting to flow.

    Vanessa wrote on September 13th, 2011
  21. HEY! Wadda ya mean by “even in Milwaukee”?!?! (I just moved to Wisconsin from SoCal so I’m might be feeling a little newbie pride :) )
    So, anybody in southern WI want to get together and win a cow?

    Larry wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Hey Larry!

      Let’s show ’em how it’s done in WI!! I’m in Milwaukee (West Allis in particular). Drop me a note if you want to get something set up.

      Karina wrote on September 13th, 2011
  22. It is my birthday tomorrow and we will be celebrating it Sunday afternoon along with my daughter’s and grandson’s birthdays. Primal birthday party here we come!!

    Magic Fingers wrote on September 13th, 2011
  23. It would be cool to organize a Grokfeast in the Houston area. Any takers?

    Grace wrote on September 13th, 2011
  24. It’s time like this I regret that most of my social life is online. Can I get bonus points for getting my usual D&D crew outside? XD

    LXV wrote on September 13th, 2011
  25. This sounds incredibly fun. I’m not sure I could fin 8 friends who wouldn’t think I was a bit crazed making them run around barefoot in the city, but I’ll see what I can rally up!

    katie wrote on September 13th, 2011
  26. Anyone in ALABAMA!?! I have one Primal friend…and few others, lol

    Chrissy wrote on September 13th, 2011
  27. Where was the Kentucky group from and are they doing it again? I only have one paleo friend! I’m in Lexington.

    Mary Ashley wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Just below your comment is another for the Evansville area. Maybe we could pull from both southern/central Indiana and Kentucky to do a picnic in Louisville. I think IU/Wildcat ‘spears’ could be put away for a day of primal picnicing. :-)

      Melie wrote on September 13th, 2011
  28. Sweet. Anyone in greater Philly wanna tackle this challenge with me?

    Kim C. wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • I live in the suburbs just outside of Philly. Most of my friends are not Primal, so I’d be interested in joining up with you for a Philly Grokfeast.

      Susan M. wrote on September 13th, 2011
  29. Man, this is awesome. I typically forage in the wild for our meat (venison, Duck and Goose) but would love some grass fed beef.

    Anyone in the Evansville Indiana (Southern IN) interested in a primal picnic?

    Patrick Fairchild wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • I’m originally from Henderson, but now live in the Indianapolis area. Perhaps we could pull together enough people to do a picnic in an in-between spot like Terre Haute or Nashville, IN. Any other Hoosiers out there?

      Melie wrote on September 13th, 2011
  30. Do you live in or near Chicago, IL? The Primal Chicagoans meetup group GROKS my world. If you live near Chicago then you MUST join the meetup group! We will be partaking in this awesome contest and will have an absolute blast no matter what the results are. I am willing to go above and beyond and do something incredibly insane and fun.

    Flash mob at the Green City farmers market? Sure! Lake Michigan plunge? WHY THE HELL NOT?! Large feast with a few dozen people? For sure. Beach volleyball? You bet.

    We are going to plan an entire day of primal fun. It’s going to totally kick ass and grok the world.

    If you live near Chicago and don’t participate then I guarantee you will be disappointed.

    So, let me know if you want to join the party!

    Primal Toad wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • so I live out in Wheaton IL (not too far from Chicago) so if no one is doing something in the west suburbs I’m in for Chicago.

      kiran trivedi wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • i live in Wicker Park, this sounds great. i have a bit of travel this month, but if available would love to make it.

      if you have a date set, let me know and i will see if it fits. great ideas!

      forrest wrote on September 14th, 2011
  31. Anyone in Massachusetts? I’m namelessw0nder on the forum, send me a message!

    namelesswonder wrote on September 13th, 2011
  32. I wanna be on this. Any SE / SW Michigan groks who would let me join in?

    Pam wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • We’re in SE Michigan too! Anyone else interested?!

      Marjorie wrote on September 13th, 2011
      • my email address is This sounds like more fun than anything else besides getting to meet other groks!

        Pam wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • I’m north of Grand Rapids – where are you?

      Kelly wrote on September 13th, 2011
  33. SE / SW Michigan picnics I could join?
    perenniallyyours is my account name.

    Pam wrote on September 13th, 2011
  34. Hi! I’m SE Michigan too!

    Tristan wrote on September 13th, 2011
  35. Sorry but Evansville is at the opposite end of the state and 6 hours from Chi-Town. Your events sound fantastic and I hope you have a great time.

    Patrick Fairchild wrote on September 13th, 2011
  36. For those without “Primal” friends/relatives why not host the event anyway and invite them to see what living Primal is all about.

    There are so many delicious dishes that can be made that many people wouldn’t even notice.

    If I am able to get my fours boys and their girlfriends together (2 of them live in different states)before the 3rd, then the Grokfeast is on!

    Robin wrote on September 13th, 2011
    • Great Idea!

      Tristan wrote on September 13th, 2011
  37. Am I the ONLY primal-oriented person in Nebraska? :/

    Joe wrote on September 13th, 2011
  38. Great idea!

    Anyone else in Western Montana?

    Jenny wrote on September 13th, 2011
  39. Some bits of the cow are missing. They are a delicacy you can taste here and probably eat there (as sausage).

    Alvaro Coronel wrote on September 13th, 2011
  40. If anyone in Melbourne is going to hold a grokfeast, please invite me!

    Nikyta wrote on September 13th, 2011

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