Marks Daily Apple
Serving up health and fitness insights (daily, of course) with a side of irreverence.
29 Dec

Grok Throws a Party

Some weeks ago after the Power of Ritual post, I had to laugh when SophieE and desert tomte shared their idea for creating our own Primal holiday. Needless to say, the musing has got the better of me. (I’ve been dipping into the egg nog one too many times, you’re wondering.) Sure, the MDA community is scattered around the globe, and our holiday schedules are likely filled. No matter. Today, I’m letting all reason and purpose fly by the wayside. Sisson’s gone nuts, you might say. Maybe so. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve heard that. I respond to the charge with those immortal, wise words, “Why ask why?” So, I’m taking SophieE and desert tomte at their word today and devoting today’s post to a virtual Primal bash – with everything befitting a Primal fete as well as a New Year’s celebration. The staff and I are in. Are you?

Step right onto the beach. (Seriously, did you expect it to be anywhere else??) It’s sunset, and the party’s just starting. Grok will be our gracious host of course. (Did I mention he’s a party guy?) He’ll also be manning the spit where you’ll find a variety of roasted delectables. If anyone cares to share their expertise or additions to the meat offerings, do speak up. Being that I wouldn’t exactly trust Grok’s Paleolithic bartending skills, however, we’ll call it BYOB. Now this is getting interesting….

In fact, let’s go with a full out Primal potluck – a chance to show off the best of your best Primal dishes. (This definitely won’t be your grandmother’s church potluck.) Contributions, folks? Do tell – and describe. Can you envision such a grand and succulent lineup? Me? I’m bringing my big a– salad of course. But I imagine everything from soup to nuts: juicy lamb kabobs, grilled shrimp with orange mango dipping sauce, buffalo chicken. And don’t forget the stunning array of Primal desserts. Heck, this event could probably be it’s own cookbook! Hmmmm….

There’s no end to what could be included in the context of good, clean, Primal fun. Bonfire’s a given. Music – heavy on the percussion. Dancing. A game of Ultimate Frisbee. (Duh.) Jerky pinata. Beach sprints. (Hey, this is starting to sound a lot like PrimalCon.) As many Festivus fans as we have out there, how about a brief but passionate airing of grievances against the offenses of conventional wisdom this year? And who will be exhibiting their feats of Primal strength? (Grokkers tend to excel in this category.) Can a Festivus pole be rigged as a javelin? Maybe that’s sacrilege. Other ideas?

I’m thinking now about what such an event might really look like. With over a million readers a month, I suppose a special permit would be required. Noise ordinances? I’m guessing we’d get several citations. It’s all good. We Primal types tend to be an earnest but raucous bunch.

Being New Year’s and all, why not take a moment of the festivities to declare what we’re each celebrating this year. What has 2011 been for you on your road to health and vitality? On MDA, it’s been the year of ongoing success stories. It’s been the year of the 21 Day Total Body Transformation. It’s been the year of favorite posts covering everything from the Grokfeast Challenge to old school summers, intentional power outages to a Primal revolution of gym classes everywhere. Doesn’t it just make you want to bust out with a round of Auld Lang Syne? (I might need another Grok grog before that.)

Toward midnight (because how could any Primal party peter out before then?), there would be the ecstatic countdown and run into the waves. Give a final exultant farewell to all that 2011 has brought you – the good and the bad. Release it into the infinite sea surrounding you. Take in the wild power of the ocean to fortify your journey in 2012. Imagine beginning the New Year surrounded by a fully pumped, wild Primal horde whooping it up at midnight.

Who knows how long the party would last after that. In a virtual vision, anything’s possible. Time Square’s got nothin’ on this. There’s (non lip synched) music, an open sky, and plenty of good Primal food and – of course – excellent Primal company. Why not stay, sing, swim, and see the sun come up on 2012?

With that, my friends, I turn over our virtual Primal fete to you. Don’t be shy. What  are you bringing? Volleyball net? Ukulele? Stupid human tricks? Best achievements and stories of the year? Most importantly, what are you bringing to the buffet? (Ha!) Enjoy, everyone! Thanks for yet another incredible year at MDA, and Happy New Year!

You want comments? We got comments:

Imagine you’re George Clooney. Take a moment to admire your grooming and wit. Okay, now imagine someone walks up to you and asks, “What’s your name?” You say, “I’m George Clooney.” Or maybe you say, “I’m the Clooninator!” You don’t say “I’m George of George Clooney Sells Movies Blog” and you certainly don’t say, “I’m Clooney Weight Loss Plan”. So while spam is technically meat, it ain’t anywhere near Primal. Please nickname yourself something your friends would call you.

  1. Oh, I forgot… A whole pig sounds divine. I will definitely have the tail and ears once they are roasted…

    Adriana wrote on December 29th, 2011
  2. I’m in! I’ll be bringing gratitude–lots and lots of it: for this wonderful website, the fabulous primal community, and the life-altering changes they have helped me make in the past 10 months. As for food–what’s a party without chocolate? I’ll put a big pile of organic dark bars on the table. Now start the music–let’s dance!

    Marianne wrote on December 29th, 2011
  3. Feliz Ano Tribal Groks/Grokettes…What a wonderful way to end the old, and bring in the New Year. Bacon wrapped potato bites and rib eye steaks will be accompanying me…Rock Out with your Grok Out!

    Dennis wrote on December 29th, 2011
  4. Since I am known as Magic Fingers, I will bring myself and offer as many massages as I could fit in!

    Donna wrote on December 29th, 2011
  5. Gee, does sound like PrimalCon which I will be attending in April :). I will bring my homemade jerky for a great snack! Looking forward to the midnight ocean dip at this party!!!

    Nini wrote on December 29th, 2011
  6. I would like to RSVP YES for 4 primal Pizzos. We will bring a bowl of bacon and the MDA Spicy Buffalo Wings recipe. See you then!!!


    2012 IS GONNA (g)ROCK!!!

    Tonja Pizzo wrote on December 29th, 2011
  7. i too am picturing a free event in a deep, dark forest…maybe we can picture the gathering slipping away from the coast and into the woods. sling shots/target practice. slack lining in the last light. howling at the moon (canine companions at our sides). a serious bonfire.

    DThalman wrote on December 29th, 2011
  8. Groktoberfest 😀

    I’m up for it!

    akprimal wrote on December 29th, 2011
  9. haahahhaa Mark, you are drunk and maybe a little high…but I like it!!! cause I am drunk myself!!! love this idea, I wish so badly that I was running straight into the ocean waves at night right now! bring on A Very Primal New Year!!!

    thetomcat wrote on December 29th, 2011
    • Haha, I also think Mark has started the party early! But its great nonetheless! Sounds like alot of fun.

      Aloka wrote on December 29th, 2011
  10. instead of a new year eve party, this Lady Grok will start the new year by a morning nature hike (fasted) then big breakfast (eggs & bacon) w/ friends.


    PHK wrote on December 29th, 2011
  11. “Can a Festivus pole be rigged as a javelin? Maybe that’s sacrilege. Other ideas?”

    Hmm yup, more sacrileges sounds good. One fine tradition that got passed from our ancestors onto neolithic civilizations by being adapted through to their pantheons everytime they made up a new set of gods, and survives to this day as April’s fools day, was the saturnalian pranking and setting aside of social conventions and mocking of all the seriousness that went on over the previous year. I am sure this would fit prfectly into a primal party 😉

    Jesrad wrote on December 30th, 2011
  12. We can bring all our “before” pictures to ensure the bonfire keeps going.

    Michelle (SA) wrote on December 30th, 2011
  13. I’ll bring both my drum kits and anything else from my studio that fits in the truck to GrokStok 2012 (aka Grokapalooza, BaconBash, Carnivore Carnival)

    Ham-bone wrote on December 30th, 2011
  14. Happy New Year! Grok will be experiencing some hangover issues… 😀

    Paul Alexander wrote on December 30th, 2011
  15. Since I’m probably the only one coming from Japan, I’ll bring the sake. Or even better, some Awa mori from Okinawa. The stuff is 50% alcohol but tastes surprisingly good with a big rock of ice splashed in it. Oh, and I’ll be sure to bring some fresh green tea for those who don’t want to indulge. Let’s Paaaaaaarrty! Whoo! (^o^)/

    TokyoJarrett wrote on December 30th, 2011
  16. Lets make Grockstock a travelling weekend campout!! A BYO food, fun weekend at local campgrounds all across North America! It’s as primal as you want it to be, and just a fun social meet-and-greet. How many people have ever camped in the Muskoka’s? Huntsville? Very primal–knee-high ferns under the forest canopy as far as the eye can see….

    MyPrimalAdventures wrote on December 30th, 2011
  17. Soo… grokstock…I think South Padre Island in South Texas would satisfy all the location requirements! But then again I live in Texas….Grokstock needs a beach…but there is no such thing as a centrally located beach hmmmmm. And should it happen in the very start of summer? Should I make a thread about this in the forum? I’ll totally try and organize this if there is enough interest. Us poor folk can’t afford primalcon :( But I wanna meet you guys hardcore! Any ideas?

    Maureen wrote on December 30th, 2011
  18. Yup I’m guilty….I started a grokstock 2012 thread in the Primal Blueprint Odds and Ends…

    Maureen wrote on December 30th, 2011
  19. Bringing in the new year in the ocean sounds so great….If I tried to do that in the coastal waters off Maine I might just freeze solid.
    for the virtual party, dark chocolate/walnut bark. Sounds like everything else is covered. Roasted Pig YUM

    bbuddha wrote on December 30th, 2011
  20. Shrimp covered in Old Bay, because apparently you unfortunate west coasters are not familiar with the most amazing spice on the planet that us mid Atlantic peeps cover almost everything in.

    Dani wrote on December 30th, 2011
  21. This year Primal living saved my life by providing a non-pharmaceutical cure for my anxiety and depression.

    To celebrate, I’ll bring some Chilean wine! I’ll be in Valparaìso for New Year’s, which is supposedly one of the biggest celebrations in the world. But I’ll be imagining that I’m surrounded by primal friends and dreaming of the day we do this for real. Until then, Felices Fiestas desde Valparaìso, Chile.

    Elisa wrote on December 30th, 2011
  22. OHHHH I am so in, how about the EAST coast Mark… come on, you know you miss the cold water :)

    I think some plain old fresh fruit, veggies to throw on the pit.

    Lisa wrote on December 30th, 2011
  23. It will be a party of 4 with out little ones and we may not make it to midnight in our timezone but there is a pile of meat waiting for some flame. We’re with you and Grok in spirit!

    Chris French wrote on December 31st, 2011
  24. Can somebody tell me how you stuff a date without mutilating it? My husband would go crazy for a bacon wrapped, cheese stuff date.

    Jennifer wrote on December 31st, 2011
  25. Hi all
    Happy New Year to everybody
    It is 1:10 am of the new year, I started it the right way: with a swim in Miami Beach doing butterfly strokes and after that watching from the water the fireworks. Live Long and Prosper Everybody!

    WildGrok wrote on December 31st, 2011
    • Comes across this on the 4th of Jan and thinks it is awesomeness.

      Upon the closure of the aqua center due to cold weather (I still scaled the steps to see) then lifted and stretched for heavy things inside my dwelling.

      Funny how many times since I started reading this blog that I’ve looked at my family and thought oh my, they are so channeling their inner grok/grokette. 😀

      Happy New Cycle!

      A Grokette wrote on January 4th, 2012

Leave a Reply

If you'd like to add an avatar to all of your comments click here!

© 2016 Mark's Daily Apple

Subscribe to the Newsletter and Get a Free Copy
of Mark Sisson's Fitness eBook and more!