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  1. #41
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    Last edited by Liquid Gusto; 01-10-2014 at 07:27 PM.

  2. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by noodletoy View Post
    am frequently surprised how "soft" people are when they are decades younger than i am. too much x-box, i guess?
    My Mom would agree with this. She's said a few times how she thinks guys of my generation seem much more feminine compared to when she was my age (in the 70s). I always thought maybe men just weren't as comfortable showing their emotions back then, but maybe this is an incorrect theory?
    Last edited by Liquid Gusto; 12-13-2013 at 05:37 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by eKatherine View Post
    But of course you know, as a doctor, that people who do crazy amounts of activity during the prime of their lives, which includes women who exercise hard several hours a day in order to maintain the appearance of fitness, often end up with overuse injuries and disabilities that permanently knock them off the hamsterwheel. Then what will you do if she can no longer meet your standards?
    So let me see if I understand.....I would hypothetically have a confident, smart, humble, empathetic, opinionated, rugged woman, and the worst thing I would possibly have in my life is that her knees and back hurt?

    I have more overuse injuries than anyone I know. I ran full tris, played 8 years of violent football in HS and college, and today do Strongman comps for fun.....so I know all about what those are like. And yes for Quikky's comment; I would gander to say that people of my ilk look a little better than lazy people. My mother worked harder than any woman should ever have to, and despite double knee replacements still gets looked at by guys my age (At 52. It's creepy.)

    It is about a mentality, not the looks alone....and for NOW, I have it in my current SO. An MD with a chick pack (not a true 6 pack. That would be gross) that grew up poor in Ontario, humble, read even more than I have, an all around amazing and beautiful woman.

    I think that women get grouchy about the idea of other women showing them up....just what it looks like sometimes. Any discussion of what a guy is really looking for, and EVERY woman tells you how you won't find it....until you do

    @Liquid Gusto

    Yes. A lot of guys my age (I am 29) are pretty much indistinguishable from 1950's era women, outside of (sometimes) the places they shop.....unassertive, meek, sensitive, skinny jeans, play on their phones all the time, can't fix anything, have no skills.

    Which means if you actually DO act like a man, you have zero competition.
    = win

    Like this exchange I had with my SO in the beginning:
    Her: "So will you maybe text me sometime this weekend? I'd love to hear from you."
    Me: "No. I don't text. I will call you at 6 on Friday, and I will be picking you up at 7:30 Saturday to take you to dinner. If I say I will be calling and I don't, I am in the hospital, just so we are clear. Wear something you can get into a good restaurant with, but bring comfortable shoes. See you Saturday."

    See, totally throws them off
    Last edited by TheyCallMeLazarus; 12-13-2013 at 08:29 PM.
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  4. #44
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    There are two deal breakers:

    1. if their eating habits wree blowing our budget and making it impossible for us to be financially stable;
    2. if they pressured me or otherwise inhibited me from making my own dietary decisions.

    Otherwise, folks can eat what they want.

  5. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheyCallMeLazarus View Post
    So let me see if I understand.....I would hypothetically have a confident, smart, humble, empathetic, opinionated, rugged woman, and the worst thing I would possibly have in my life is that her knees and back hurt?
    No. You have a confident, smart, humble, empathetic, opinionated, rugged woman who manages to control her weight through excessive exercise. And when she is no longer able to exercise, she starts to put on weight. She can end up putting on a lot of weight.

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    Importance of Significant Other's Eating Habits?

    Laz's comment makes sense. She sounds awesome... MD + "girl pack" (first time I have heard that term).

    People who are fit (and not just skinny fat) tend to stay that way as long as they keep it up later in life. I am not talking about people who ruin their knees with chronic cardio. I am talking about girls who do a bit of HIIT and some strength training.

    Ekath I take offense to your underlying assumption that girls care only about appearances because of guys. Please. I care because I want to look good. For me. Every time I have ever tried to get leaner the guy I am with is like..."you don't need to; you look good now" or whatever but I want to get leaner for me, myself, and I. I put on lipstick and a dress every day, even during law school finals, for me. The guys' attention is nice but not the motivating factor. I spend a lot of hours of my life trying to make sure I "look good" and I am most certainly not trying to catch a man for marriage. Additionally, I actually like the weight room and the elliptical. It helps me destress and I love the people at my gym.
    Last edited by turquoisepassion; 12-14-2013 at 01:18 AM.
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    Turquoise, I'm another one who does what I do primarily for myself. If others like it, well and good, if not - tough.

  8. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by Annieh View Post
    Turquoise, I'm another one who does what I do primarily for myself. If others like it, well and good, if not - tough.
    Haha yeah. I rarely run into a girl who worries about her looks solely because of guys. It is always for herself or for other women...
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  9. #49
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    I'm a lone wolf. I've occasionally thought that pairing up with someone would be nice, but it's never been a goal or necessary for my happiness. Marriage? I can't even imagine it. I won't live with someone who makes my life more difficult, who expects me to make lots of compromises and cater to their preferences. I will not be dominated, controlled, or manipulated into compliance. I can't do it with housemates, and I'm not going to do it with a lover. And I expect any gent I get involved with to feel the same. So while I've had relationships, including some that lasted for several years, and am still friends with most of those guys, I've never married and only lived with a man once (for four miserable months, back when I was 21, and I chose homelessness rather than stay--it was that intolerable).

    Now, that said, the one man I loved most, shared the deepest bond with, and could have married died of a massive heart attack at 57. He was a good man, but he had terrible habits, including a 2-pack-a-day smoking habit and a diet that was absolute crap.

    I couldn't get him to stop smoking, and I couldn't get him to fix his diet. I felt terrible about that at the time, but damn it, it wasn't my job to. I may be a woman, but that does not automatically make me cook, housekeeper, dietician, nursemaid, and social secretary in a relationship, and I will not step into those roles to save a man from his own indifference. I want a functioning adult who can take care of himself, rather than shove responsibility for it off on his wife or girlfriend. If someone's way of living is so broken and unhealthy, and they aren't already making the effort to save themselves, I can't help them. And I'm not going to martyr myself and become a nag in trying.

    When it comes to things like health, diet, fitness, and bodily aesthetics, I don't demand or expect perfection. I just want someone who cares enough to take care of himself. And there's a bunch of attractive (to me) personality traits that go along with that. Independent thinking, and a willingness to buck authority (rather than simply accept CW). Seeing oneself as master of your own fate (rather than passively accepting obesity and preventable disease as "normal"). The intellectual curiosity that leads one to do their own homework, to google stuff, read books, to conduct endless n=1 experiments. The self-assurance that lets one go against the grain to act in their own best interests, while shrugging off ignorant comments. Optimism about the future, and a positive attitude toward aging, and even death.

    Is it necessary that they follow the same diet I do? No. Chances are good they won't. Their n=1 experiments may have led them to very different conclusions about their body's needs, and I love comparing results and discussing what's worked (or not) and why. What I do expect, however, is that they will respect my results and my methods, and not try to convert me. I expect they will not use their results and methods as the yardstick by which anyone else should be measured.

    That said, I've dated ovo-lacto vegetarians and pescetarians with no trouble. Ditto, some guys who eat more conventional diets. Where things fall apart is with vegans. I'm one of those people who could live on steak and eggs. I thrive on a heavy animal-based diet, with lots of fat. I don't care if someone wants to eat only plant matter--hey, go for it. I support anyone who wants to try it, having gone there myself. But inevitably, I end up getting painted as the environmentally-irresponsible one, the supporter of factory farming, the one who is carrying pounds of rotting meat in her colon, the one who will die of cancer or heart disease, the hypocrite who volunteers for animal welfare groups while also eating animals. It always ends up spiralling down into the same cesspit of crappy vegan propaganda and self-righteousness, so I don't even bother. You're vegan? Awesome. But your dick ain't getting anywhere near me, end of story.

  10. #50
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    Lol. Artemis. XD that last few lines were awesome.
    ------
    HCLF: lean red meat, eggs, low-fat dairy, bone broth/gelatin, fruits, seafood, liver, small amount of starch (oatmeal, white rice, potatoes, carrots), small amount of saturated fat (butter/ghee/coconut/dark chocolate/cheese).

    My Journal: gelatin experiments, vanity pictures, law school rants, recipe links


    Food blog: GELATIN and BONE BROTH recipes

    " The best things in life are free and the 2nd best are expensive!" - Coco Chanel

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