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  1. #1
    Hannakb's Avatar
    Hannakb is offline Senior Member
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    Christmas

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    Ok I know a bit early for some (I'm in Australia, no Thanksgiving & not to many do Halloween).
    Part of a conversation with another mother:
    This was on Facebook for Christmas ideas: something they want
    Something they need
    Something to wear
    Something to read.
    Me: that's heaps
    OM (slightly shocked): it's only 4 presents! I'm not happy unless there's at least 10 each.

    Umm, am I the only one out there that thinks Christmas isn't all about presents?
    How many is too many?
    I'm not anti presents or anything like that, I just think that most children these days are given way to much.

  2. #2
    vh67's Avatar
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    This year, in my immediate family, we are doing handmade or repurposed gifts. Nothing new and nothing expensive. I am going to learn to make soy candles and have been finding containers for them all year.

    I am not really religious so Christmas is about togetherness and family. The commercials here have already started and I am already sick of them. Presents should have meaning. Sadly, I have a niece who would get upset if she didn't get more gifts then everyone else so my sister used to always make sure she had the most. She didn't care how nice her gifts were, just the number. I stopped buying gifts for her a couple years go because of her attitude. I also don't understand going into debt for Christmas.

  3. #3
    Gay Panda's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vh67 View Post
    Sadly, I have a niece who would get upset if she didn't get more gifts then everyone else so my sister used to always make sure she had the most. She didn't care how nice her gifts were, just the number.


    I don't even know what to say to that.

  4. #4
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    We have a money limit for our kids. If the gift costs that much they get one gift! Helps that they are 29 and 22 now though but we have used this throughout their childhood. I guess it depends on the way we are brought up what our expectations are at Xmas or any other time that gifts are traditional.

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    Whenever I get stressed about Christmas gift giving I remember this story:

    The Gift of the Magi

    My definition of a gift is something someone wants but would never buy for themselves. Doesn't apply to children but should be something enstilled in them.

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    I don't have a very large extended family, and frankly, none of us needs any more stuff. So there's zero pressure to give Christmas gifts among the adults (and the kids are still too little to have figured out Christmas).

    If I see something that is absolutely perfect for a specific someone, and I know they'll love it, I'll buy it for them. But I don't expect a gift in return. And I'll be honest--I would prefer not to receive them. I look at presents with dread, and opening them (especially in front of the giver) is an ordeal. I got so many disappointing gifts as a kid, and each time I knew I had to pretend to love it so as not to hurt the giver's feelings, which of course meant similar disappointing gifts in the future. The Christmas emotional cocktail of being simultaneously bummed out at not getting what I really wanted, resentful that I had to pretend I was happy, and ashamed because I knew I was being an ungrateful little shitweasel? Yeah, I'm still nursing that hangover, even though I haven't received a bad gift in ages.

    But that whole experience means that I only give gifts I'm sure the recipient will absolutely love, because damn it, I do not want to be the giver of disappointing gifts. Not even to the same people who gave me bummer presents when I was a kid.

  7. #7
    Jenry Hennings's Avatar
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    I personally never ask for presents. The best gifts are those you give. I cherish values and decency over material goods any day. Working for things you want is far more satisfying.
    And I'm not really religious. I don't celebrate Ramadan or Hanukkah so why should i pay any more attention to christmas?

  8. #8
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    These days I actually enjoy finding the perfect gift for someone more than getting one.

    But when I was a kid, we were fairly poor. Maybe it sounds superficial, but getting gifts on Christmas was really an amazing experience then. We didn't really get to buy toys or gifts any other time of the year, so getting this morning of fun and indulgence was very special. We did get quite a few gifts - although in retrospect I realize a lot them were things like socks, underwear, shampoo, etc. Things we needed. I don't think we were superficial or shallow. But we did love Christmas morning!!

    Some things are just meant to be fun and light. And gift giving should be one of them.
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    Coming from a largish family, with never quite enough of a budget, we've always concentrated on giving what's needed for Christmas, and something wanted for birthdays.

  10. #10
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    I have explained to my daughter about the story of Santa Claus and Jesus' birth and I think she understands that gifts she receives at Christmas are representative of the gifts given to baby Jesus, and are not from Santa Claus. I've also tried to explain to her that other children may have been told their gifts are from Santa Claus, so we should not tell them otherwise as that is their parents' decision. I don't know if she "gets" all of this, but I do try to give her as much information as I can. I like for there to be enough presents under the tree to cover most of the tree skirt, so I try to hold back on purchases I've made for things she needs at the end of the year so that I can wrap them and put them under the tree too - like socks, undergarments, cute drinking cups -- basic stuff wrapped in pretty Christmas paper. Last year she got 3 cardigans and I wrapped each of them individually. She laughed when she got to the third box of yet another cardigan.
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