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    diene's Avatar
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    A Thread About Sex...

    Primal Fuel
    Ladies...Was there a time in your life during which you had trouble achieving orgasm with a partner? Did that change at some point? Did you meet a man who was able to help you overcome your difficulties? How did you/they do it? Care to share your experiences?

    Guys...feel free to chime in as well. I really would like to limit this to constructive input, if possible.

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    naiadknight's Avatar
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    For me, it was something internal. I could enjoy sex, and get a physical orgasm, but there wasn't much of an emotional tie. I'm slowly healing from parts of my past the made me emotionally dead in certain aspects, and with that comes the emotional tie that allows me to emotionally enjoy orgasm.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
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    Oral

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    I really hope this thread doesnt get shut down as I'd love the input of other people.

    I can offer nothing here as I'm part of the NO-O club. It's been a problem as men take it as a personal slight that they cant make it happen. Luckily my current partner doesnt put pressure on me and I feel v. comfortable with him, so I have faith...
    "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

    In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

    - Ray Peat

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    I have never achieved orgasm from intercourse. For me oral does it every time. Luckily my husband loves to do it. I can imagine it must be hard if you have a partner who doesn't like it. One other factor for me is fantasy. Because oral can be very "embarassing" (for lack of a better word), I tend to take my mind elsewhere. Kind of like watching sexy movies in my head.
    I've always wondered if others do this or if I'm just kinky.

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    Leida's Avatar
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    I am a NO-O too. I tried to follow some books, but just gave up, as it requires far too much efforts. All and all, sex is just not something that has an appeal to me. Used to bother me, now I don't care.
    Last edited by Leida; 10-27-2013 at 05:48 AM.
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    Kris T's Avatar
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    I am fortunate that I can have multiple O's during sex. I have a very open partner who is up for anything, and I love and trust him and that I think makes all the difference.

    I have my biggest and most mind blowing O's when I am on top. I have actually had them in every position. He makes it easy for me to relax and enjoy the moment.

    I have often wondered why it is so easy for me to have an O. I know others who stress over it because they struggle to get there. I have never had that issue.

    Wish I knew the answer to why it is so easy for me....every woman should enjoy this part of sex.

    Good luck ladies!!
    Last edited by Kris T; 10-27-2013 at 09:49 AM.
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    From what I have read and experienced personally, the more comfortable you are having an orgasim by yourself, the easier it makes it to have one with someone else. It is not s subject most people like to talk about or even admit doing but it is natural, until you go blind or your hand falls off.. There are articles that walk you through it if you have never done it or are uncomfortable with it.

    Being comfortable with yourself and your body enhances sexual activities of all kinds. Plus I think the more orgasims you have, the easier it becomes to have one.

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    Quote Originally Posted by vh67 View Post
    From what I have read and experienced personally, the more comfortable you are having an orgasim by yourself, the easier it makes it to have one with someone else. It is not s subject most people like to talk about or even admit doing but it is natural, until you go blind or your hand falls off.. There are articles that walk you through it if you have never done it or are uncomfortable with it.

    Being comfortable with yourself and your body enhances sexual activities of all kinds. Plus I think the more orgasims you have, the easier it becomes to have one.
    I second that

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    I don't know about others, but I don't really have difficulty achieving orgasm on my own. I just have a hard time with a partner, and oral doesn't do it for me either. Also, I don't like to have to fantasize about something else in order to get there. I have orgasmed with a partner in the past (standard missionary position is actually the one that does it for me), but I had to fantasize about something else in order to get there. And I don't want to have to do that. What I want is to be in the moment, with my partner...does that make sense?

    The point isn't just to have orgasms. The point is to share that experience with another person.

    ETA: Leida--did you come across any books that are good?

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