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Thread: Brenn, the FatCrazyLady, documents stuff page

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    Brenn, the FatCrazyLady, documents stuff

    Primal Fuel
    So, been lurking a while, figured I'd jump in and hope for the best.

    Short story: 41yo. Married. Three kids. Live in the Midwest, originally from Gulf Coast. Currently about 310lbs.

    I'm currently gluten-free. I'm one of those people that it makes insane. Been GF for about a year, and was able to get off of anti-depressants completely after about 5 months. I'm one of those that gluten is my opiate, literally. I may as well toke or pop a Valium, which really? Much nicer than gluten. But yeah, larger amounts mellow me, which means I'm one of those neuro-sensory gluten people.

    Today I'm in bed, all day, from gluten poisoning. Headaches. Sore joints. Pain like electrical pulses all over my skin. I'm starting to feel a bit better, so I'll be getting up shortly and prepping some food to really jump wholeheartedly into Primal tomorrow for my own 21 day challenge (that of course I'm not synced with everyone else for, but that's ok).

    Hopes for PB:
    - makes it easier to not be accidentally glutened
    - kick the sugar demon's ass
    - find energy again
    - just feel better

    Yes, weight loss would be awesome. 260 would be nice. 210 would be nicer. 160 I haven't seen since junior high. Since I lost weight on Atkins several years ago, I'm pretty sure that primal with lower carbs would work eventually. It's a secondary goal though.

    I have sensory issues with food, and I'm weirdly picky, but I'm not worrying about that for now. I'll just eat what I can, try to move every day (walking, especially should be easier now that it's getting nicer out there so it doesn't feel as much like a chore). Do that for a few weeks. See what happens.

    So, that's me. I'm looking around for journals of people like me, so I guess this should serve as an intro should I pop up on your thread.

    I'm really not as lifeless as I feel right now and am sure I'm coming across. Yep, I just wanna get ME back!!

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    Other stuff:

    Primal isn't new to me. My ability to just DO it is. Luckily I have friends who are also GF, paleo, or in various ways reject CW. This is good.

    My family is CW all the way, with my mom having lost a ton of weight in the last couple of years, which should make me happy for her but she's so skinny-fat and unhealthy looking it makes me want to cry. My dad is happy that his diabetes meds make him able to continue eating crap and drinking beer.

    I've had my vibrams for over a year now. I love them.

    I quit smoking tobacco about 3 months ago and moved to vapeing (electronic cigarettes). My nicotine consumption is going down steadily, and I live that the vaporizer lets me still "smoke", but even that is becoming less of a crutch. I am coming off of a pack a day habit for 25 years, and don't even miss it.

    I quit caffeine a decade ago. I pretty much stopped soda around the same time, except for a Sierra mist a few times a year.

    I started drinking caffeine around the time that I got off of the antidepressants. I'd hoped it would provide some mental clarity. It does a bit, but I've been aware enough to not get the daily addiction going again.

    I hate veggies. Really. The ones I like are starchy or not even veg. Tomatoes, peppers, onions - none of them raw. Sweet potato. Butternut squash. Potatoes. And sweet corn (see, a grain, but fresh local heirloom sweet corn covered in local amish butter is most definitely a veg... or candy crack). That's it, I think. Yeah. Seasoning "veg", like some fresh herbs, garlic, ginger, spring onions, chives, yeah, I "eat" those too.

    I'm strangely not a huge fan of fruit. Probably from a lifetime of sugar addiction. I do eat it from time to time though, but the textures are usually too much for me too take on a sensory level.

    I detest cooked eggs. I can put one raw in a smoothie or egg nog, but cooked hell no.

    Between being on Atkins before and being GF, I've broken the NEED for bread and pasta for the most part.

    Did I mention I hate veg?

    I'm such a basket case.

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    Hello and welcome FCL. I love the name, wish I had picked it as my own. You are in good company here. We can help you achieve your goals. That's not true, we just offer a good shoulder to moan, winge, cry and laugh on. But I'll be checking in to watch your progress and cheer you on.
    I'm not saying lets kill all the stupid people in the world, I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem take care of itself.

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    Yep, I just wanna get ME back!!
    Amen, sister!

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    Hi! Thanks for coming by, as I could totally use the cheerleading!!! Hopefully I can catch up and start participating elsewhere soon.

    Today went fine, as expected. I've been so freaking miserable since The Glutening that just about anything would be a "good" day.

    Trying to remember the goal right now is to just eat real food: no grains, no added sugars, junk foods, etc. I went to enter food into a program today, and started getting all panicked about macros and ratios and my brain exploded.

    I can't go there yet. I just need to go day by day and get my body out of addiction mode.

    To that end, today was:
    A package of bacon (minus a couple of slices for a kid)
    A banana with Greek yogurt and freeze-dried blueberries
    A burger patty with aged cheddar cheese for dinner.

    Dinner was supposed to be carnitas, but I started the pork in the crock too late. But they'll be ready for tomorrow.

    I've also had a ton of water, sea salt for electrolyte balance, and even remembered my mag citrate supplement for the day.

    Wanted to go walk, but still just didn't have the energy. But I'm getting there. I can also tell my body is losing the bloat from The Glutening, and the rosacea inflammation on my cheek seems to be going down.

    I also didn't cry, nor did I want to kill people today. But I know my body is so screwed up, because an hour after 14oz of bacon, I was staring into the cupboards. But that's where the fruit concoction came in.

    So, lets chalk this one in the win column, shall we?

    Maybe tomorrow I'll remember to take some D3 as well.

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    I hate today. Decided to makes some pancake/crepe things for brunch today because the thought of meat made me sick.

    I mentioned I hate eggs, right? These things tasted like scrambled eggs. So. Freaking. Nasty. Now the house smells nasty and ugh. Sadly, I was starting to think that eggs I cooked for the family smelled good and that there was hope for me in egg land.

    Blergh.

    Oh, and I'm actually crying over old episodes of How I Met Your Mother.

    Today sucks.

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    Sorry today wasn't so good. Sometimes life just throws a curveball and we feel how we feel and don't know why. Tomorrow will be better I'm sure.
    I'm not saying lets kill all the stupid people in the world, I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem take care of itself.

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    Today was a high carb day. Some good. Some bad. Only cried a couple of times.

    We'll call it neutral.

    No? Ok. Whatever.

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    No we'll call it a shit day. Life is way better than only crying a couple of times a day Brenn. But stick with it. You WILL come out the other side. I must be honest, I've been there many years ago. It gets better.
    I'm not saying lets kill all the stupid people in the world, I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem take care of itself.

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    Primal Blueprint Expert Certification
    I'm trying to stay positive!! Ha!!! Yeah, I know. This stupid Glutening sucks. I know from experience it takes me almost exactly 2.5 weeks to feel human again. Tomorrow is a week.

    Real food. Real food. That's the mantra. I'll get it. I know it. Maybe tomorrow I will go spend money and eat a steak somewhere.

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