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  1. #21
    Cryptocode's Avatar
    Cryptocode is offline Senior Member
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    This happened to us recently. We knew when we accepted what type of dinner it would be - non-paleo to the extreme. If we were purists I guess we'd have declined gracefully. But we went and we ate dinner pleasantly. Although I ate very little. We left fairly early because I was really hungry.
    "When the search for truth is confused with political advocacy, the pursuit of knowledge is reduced to the quest for power." - Alston Chase

  2. #22
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    magicmerl is offline Senior Member
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    The better class of restaurant actually lists gluten free menu options (as GF).
    Disclaimer: I eat 'meat and vegetables' ala Primal, although I don't agree with the carb curve. I like Perfect Health Diet and WAPF Lactofermentation a lot.

    Griff's cholesterol primer
    5,000 Cal Fat <> 5,000 Cal Carbs
    Winterbike: What I eat every day is what other people eat to treat themselves.
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  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ryancarter1986 View Post
    Get the same situation when I go to restaurant .
    I point out my intolerances etc , lactose wheat grains gluten etc .
    Then it's like a big joke for them making a big deal out of every dish that arrives . Makes me feel very uncomfortable and ruins the evening for me & my guests .

    if the restaurant staff is mocking you, you need to speak the manager and also never go back. having worked in restaurants for many years, such special requests can be a nuisance, but they can also be life-threatening and must be taken very seriously.

    i eat out often with little trouble, but do not frequent chains, so am not subject to that mass-made food.

    when invited to a home, it really depends. if i can't bring anything and i don't know them well, i often will eat before i go just to be sure i am not starving. then i pick around what i can eat, or just say i'm not very hungry. if it's closer friends, i am an excellent cook so they always want me to bring something. if the op is having this problem with close friends you need to disclose your issues a bit instead of eating stuff that makes you sick.

    if it's a function there will always be salad, cheese, meat, etc. -- something i can manage. but again, if i don't know what's being served i will eat before i go.
    As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.

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  4. #24
    mantra's Avatar
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    I disagree with claiming celiac disease if you don't actually have it. I do have celiac disease, and it's very frustrating to deal with people who treat it as just another passing fad. I think it's much more helpful to frame it as, 'I'm avoiding certain foods to deal with a health problem' and leave it at that.

    Honestly, I think food situations are as much about the guest than the host. If you refuse to eat anything, sulk about the lack of option, launch into rants about the food, complain that you're hungry and generally come off as miserable and entitled--you're the problem. No one wants to be around people like that. Don't want to eat something or disagree with the food options? Great. Keep it to yourself and have a good time.

    Regarding bringing food: I think that can be dicey. If it's a full dinner party, the host has probably put a ton of effort into planning their menu. I might ask when I get the invitation--'I'd love to go! Can I bring anything to share?' If they say no, I don't push it.

    I think a gracious host might notice that someone isn't eating but wouldn't make a big deal about it. Going on and on because someone isn't eating something/the host feels the guest isn't eating enough is also beyond awkward for everyone.

    This is what I do: Find something I can eat (and by that I mean gluten-free and not necessarily 100% Primal--that's what my 20% is for), enjoy it, and compliment the host. Chances are there's a salad or veggies or something. And while I'm in someone else's home, it's the best salad I've ever had and can't possible eat another bite because I'm so full. I'll probably go home and make myself a meal, but I certainly wouldn't say that at another person's party.

    They didn't make it to taunt you. They made it because they thought you would like it.
    I think this is the most important thing to remember when you're invited to eat someone else's food.
    Last edited by mantra; 09-02-2013 at 04:17 PM.

  5. #25
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    It can be as simple as saying, "No thanks, I'm not hungry." Be polite, have fun, and don't eat. If you really have to provide an excuse, tell someone you're fasting. Most people will not argue with that.

  6. #26
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    If they so blatantly don't respect your food choices, how can they be your friends?
    For people I don't know so well, I just tell them that I'm gluten intolerant (which I am-very mildly), and sensitive to sugar (acne breakouts when I have too much). If they have nothing else to eat, I just IF it.

    T.

  7. #27
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    I used to stress about this but then I realized nobody is actually interested in watching me chew and swallow. I may try a bite or two of oil/sugar/grain if the cook seems eager for feedback but there's no reason to eat a quantity that will cause digestive or nutritional damage.

    Any gathering nowadays will have enough vegetarians, kosher, and allergies that an old-fashioned dinner where we sit passively and receive plated food is pretty rare. The hosts I know will lay out serving dishes in more of a self-serve style. As long as I'm nibbling or sipping on something everyone will relax.
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  8. #28
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    I was at a potluck a few weeks back and ate all the veggies and meat without the pasta and bread. Everyone commented, a joke here and there about my "diet", I just laughed with them. I don't even bother explaining, most don't really care beyond the ridiculous comments they are saving to toss your way as soon as your done talking or think its (you are) completely insane anyway.

    I was happy and full of energy at the end of the night while everyone was dragging along and commenting about how they had eaten too much and were bloated "from all that good food."

  9. #29
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    If a person serves good food, but not primal/paleo then I'll just eat what I can and try not to be selfish (i.e. eating all the meat). Likely I'll be going hungry if its bread/pasta focused.
    If someone was to question my dietary choice I just tell them I'm intolerant (which is true). If they were somebody that wouldn't shut up about it, then I would explain my dissatisfaction at their attitude. If they continued I would stop being friends.
    If its just flat out bad food (TV dinners), then I'd eat before I went there.

  10. #30
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    The waiters.
    They don't mock me its just irritating and annoying.

    It was restaurant called zuma . Japanese fusion. Called 2 days ahead , no gf menu provided .

    I just gave up in the end everything had some soy base thing in & cudnt be bothered to spend 100 on sushi .


    From London England UK

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