It sounds like you're just making excuses to stay in the same old now. You want out. He's ok with it. You want to leave the east. Now that you can do all of the above you're fighting with yourself to stay when you know it's doomed? Why?
F 28/5'4/100 lbs
"I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath; do your research."
When I'd had enough of the grain and starched based 'diabetic eating for health' diet (eating for health, my ass!) my weight was 242.5 lbs. On starting primal- 18th April 2013 weight : 238.1.
27th July 2013. weight after 100 days 136.9 weight lost 101.2lb ; that's 105.6lbs since I stopped the 'diabetic eating for health'
new journal http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum...ml#post1264082
Do you guys also turn into werewolves? I don't think my bf would be into that. I have a hard time getting him to work out.
I guess there are no votes for the "try to fix it" option.
You guys are probably right. Since a couple people pointed out that I had left out the things that I like about my bf, I was thinking about it. And I guess I was thinking about it too hard/taking too long, and I suddenly realized that it should not be that hard to come up with things that I like about him. I mean, I came up with a few things: (1) he's a libertarian (but this is silly cuz he's not the only libertarian guy I've ever been with), (2) he can be pretty funny sometimes (makes me laugh), (3) we have similar tastes in food (this is kinda important to me cuz I really like to cook and eat food)...that's about it. Everything else I came up with has to do with the length of time we've been together--oh, we've been together for so long, there are so many memories, there were/are definitely a lot of good times too, it would be so sad for it to end, I can't believe I'm ending it...
Life is death. We all take turns. It's sacred to eat during our turn and be eaten when our turn is over. RichMahogany.
That's secret lore reserved for the veteran participants :x
Kinda though- my intent in starting such an event was to increase the intensity of participants' biology.
For example- last month we had a gentle soul kinda guy come out, who you can't imagine even making a fist. Today he is out buying a mouthguard and is going to throw his hat in tomorrow.
Our woman custom is to bare and decorate your belly button, but only my wife follows it with any dedication- some girls cite self-consciousness.
"Ah, those endless forests, and their horror-haunted gloom! For what eternities have I wandered through them, a timid, hunted creature, starting at the least sound, frightened of my own shadow, keyed-up, ever alert and vigilant, ready on the instant to dash away in mad flight for my life. For I was the prey of all manner of fierce life that dwelt in the forest, and it was in ecstasies of fear that I fled before the hunting monsters."
Jack london, "Before Adam"
Best to leave and make a clean break now I think. I didn't reply sooner because I don't have neutral perspective with this sort of thing, my ex was horribly controlling but it took me a long time to find the courage to leave. I realise though-you don't need neutral perspective, experience is valid and useful too.
People who control in relationships don't change (can't?), and a controlling relationship can never be any more than ok in my opinion. More usually, you will end up resenting and hating him. It sounds like you have made your decision anyway, asking here is simply looking for reassurance you are doing the right thing you don't need that, but it's completely normal to want it.
Hope your move goes smoothly
Last edited by excursivey; 08-20-2013 at 12:16 PM. Reason: Typo
Breathe. Move forward.
I just eat what I want...
People can change over time, but it's slow, usually. And it sounds like you have some fundamental issues with the BF that aren't going to go away. Controlling people don't tend to change. They may lighten up some, but they remain controlling. Do you want to always have to ask permission and answer 20 questions when you want to go out with friends? Do you want to be taken for granted re cleaning and cooking? It doesn't sound like it. It sounds like he said the one thing he knew he needed to say to get you to reconsider and now you are. It's actually pretty common for controlling people to also be rather manipulative. You weren't happy before, you won't be happy now. Move back to CA would be my advice.
High Weight: 225
Weight at start of Primal: 189
Current Weight: 174
Goal Weight: 130
Primal Start Date: 11/26/2012
If the guy ain't giving you vag tingles, he's obviously a controlling loser, you deserve the best blablabla, go collect cash & prizes and start sleeping with Mr Anthony.
1. The sound of his voice makes you dig your fingernails into your palms to keep from punching him in the face even when he's only saying, "Good morning."How do you know if you should break up with someone?
2. You'd rather clean out the bathtub than have sex with him.
3. You do passive-agressive things like "accidentally" putting in a red garment with all his whites, so all his clothes turn pink.
4. When you cook dinner for him, you keep fantasizing that it's his head in the oven.
5. You start realizing that the only reason you've stayed this long is that you love his dog/cat.
6. He tells you a joke, and you just want to poke him in the eye with a stick.
There are many more, depending on the situation, but that's a start.
"Now I'm just another anonymous shut-in with an online shopping addiction." - Georgina Sparks.
"I puked like a hero for the rest of the night." - Anthony Bourdain, 2002.
"Brain: an apparatus with which we think that we think." - Ambrose Bierce