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  1. #1
    joapple's Avatar
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    Raw Apple

    Primal Fuel
    A few weeks ago a colleague of mine mentioned that his daughter, who suffers from various health issues, was trying a stone age diet and having great success on it. "Stone age diet?" thought I. "What fad is this?" So I did some research (OK, I typed 'stone age diet' into Google) and eventually found The Primal Blueprint, and this blog and forum. I read the book - skeptically - and started to read blog posts now and again. Eventually I decided to try my very own n=1 and gave up grains. I was blown away by how I lost an inch off my waist and belly in the first few days, so I've decided to stick with it. And now, bore you all by journaling my progress.
    I am a very ordinary apple. There will not be high drama in this space, or multiple wailing and gnashing of teeth, unless I fall into the ice cream again. There will be occasional cries for attention, but you can ignore them easily enough. There are unlikely to be forays into the fine arts. Fair warning given. Brace yourselves!

  2. #2
    joapple's Avatar
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    So why am I doing this? Why am I giving up bagels with cream cheese, hot buttered toast, pizza? ( I lied. When I contemplate the lack of pizza in my life I wail disconsolately, and there is teeth gnashing)

    The reason is simple - pure vanity. I would like to claim nobler reasons - a profound interest in nutrition, or to overcome some horrific medical condition, but that would be a lie. No, my reason is shameful vanity. I want to look good naked.

    My impetus for this is due to my Almost Husband (fiancÚ just sticks in the throat and I'm never sure where the accent goes, or in which direction). AH is fit and toned, with a physique that younger men would weep to see. He looks *fantastic* naked! And although I am secure enough in his affections to know that he loves me now for who and what I am, I want to make an effort to improve my own body in turn.

    Also I want to look *awesome* in my wedding photos.

    So not only am I a very ordinary apple, I am a shallow and vain apple who is doing this for no higher reason than vanity. I can live with that :-)

  3. #3
    BZM's Avatar
    BZM
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    I enjoy your writing! Gnash away, pizza is worth it.

    I still haven't fallen far enough to try "paleo" pizza crust. I fear the disappointment may be too much for me and and that a relapse would soon follow.

    Cheers!
    ---
    The day I start worrying about what a vegan thinks of me is the day they push my body out on a flaming Viking boat.
    - One of y'all said this

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    FYI - Dominos actually makes a yummy GF crust that every once in awhile I eat to not miss pizza too much. Order a small "pacific veggie" pizza with gluten free crust. YUMMY.

    And your writing is delightful btw!

  5. #5
    joapple's Avatar
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    Ahh...this apple blushes at the compliments - thank you. My ego loves you :-)

    Here today in the apple cave it is very very hot, and I am sitting here only in my peel, bemoaning the lack of air conditioning (but seriously - British summers rarely get this hot) and pondering the mysteries of weight loss.

    Before I ventured here I knew no better. Being someone who at worst was chubby, I was unaware of the hell that fat and obese people can endure. I honestly thought that calories in and calories out was how it worked, and I felt smugly superior to those who had obviously not made an effort and had let their consumption run riot. I am embarrassed and humbled now that I am more aware of the hideous reality that is daily life for many. And I am very sorry.

    I do not know my current weight. I have never owned a pair of scales and do not wish to, since that way lies obsession and paranoia. At my heaviest I was about 150 pounds. Last time I weighed myself was three months ago at my father's home, and I was about 138. Since giving up grains and attempting (with occasional ice cream moments) to be more primal I have lost 3 inches off my waist and 2 off my belly. This is shocking and awesome in equal measure, since I still have to force myself to add fat lest I slip back into prior habits. After only a few days of lifting dumbbells there are the teeniest tiniest beginnings of what may eventually turn out to be muscle, if my bingo wings ever take flight.

    Alas, as yet there is no stunning improvement in my energy, or my libido (is that TMI? Sod it - who cares!) but I am happy to take what I have and see where this journey takes me next.

    Ideally I would like to be a fit and toned 125 pound bundle of happiness. Then I feel guilty because other people are fighting such heroic battles for so much less, and my goals seem downright trivial. But we all have our particular dragons to slay, so I should not complain if mine is somnolent and only craves ice cream.
    Last edited by joapple; 07-14-2013 at 08:42 AM. Reason: missing word - an *important* missing word!

  6. #6
    Twibble's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BZM View Post
    I enjoy your writing! Gnash away, pizza is worth it.

    I still haven't fallen far enough to try "paleo" pizza crust. I fear the disappointment may be too much for me and and that a relapse would soon follow.

    Cheers!
    Try the Chebe mixes if you're that worried. You have to mix them until they're smooth then spread them out, but our kids (who eat conventional at their mom's) love it. Made from tapioca starch, cheese, milk, and olive oil. It makes a very tasty thin crust pizza and is much tastier than some of the GF options out there. I never tried Domino's because they decided when they released their GF crust that the GF pizzas were only for people who were GF to lose weight, not for health reasons, and didn't worry at ALL about cross-contamination or any other such trivial things. Lots of celiacs got sick as a dog from it before that was well-known.
    Most people don't realize how much energy it takes for me to pretend to be normal.

    If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I'd fart.

    Twibble's Twibbly Wibbly

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by joapple View Post
    Ideally I would like to be a fit and toned 125 pound bundle of happiness. Then I feel guilty because other people are fighting such heroic battles for so much less, and my goals seem downright trivial. But we all have our particular dragons to slay, so I should not complain if mine is somnolent and only craves ice cream.
    I weigh 185. We have friends living in back of our property who probably weigh twice that and aren't willing to do anything about it, but tell me I don't need to do anything to better my health because I'm not as big as they are. Uh, seriously?
    Most people don't realize how much energy it takes for me to pretend to be normal.

    If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I'd fart.

    Twibble's Twibbly Wibbly

  8. #8
    joapple's Avatar
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    Twibble - that sounds delightful pizza, but I must confess to being a lazy cook, so I shall drool at the description rather than hurry to the kitchen. But thank you anyway - when my Ice Cream Dragon roars for pizza I shall bear this information in mind.

  9. #9
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    Twibble - that sounds horrifying and shocking and so many other adjectives. Why would anyone give up on their health if there were still options? The level of denial in some people astounds me, and makes me despair for them.

  10. #10
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    Note to self - I really really need to master quoting on this tablet.

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