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Thread: Journey To Happiness - A Magical Land Where I'm Finally Content page 10

  1. #91
    brooke.S.'s Avatar
    brooke.S. is offline Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    Quote Originally Posted by Derpamix View Post
    I don't dislike anything about myself, I think I'm the greatest, and I'm really beautiful; yet it doesn't stop me from being completely depressed. I think I just dislike everything else.
    Show us pics so we can see how beautiful you are!

    What do you mean by, I just dislike everything else? Do you mean about yourself? I hope not!

  2. #92
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    Quote Originally Posted by Driedmango View Post

    It's also starting to dawn on me that other people really don't see me how I see myself. She was saying something about how she's one of the "chubby" people, and I asked her what constitutes being a "chubby" person. Her response was "anything from me and bigger". I told her I had a very messed up perception of my own body, so I didn't know if I was in that category. Her response was "well, I'm size 12 in pants...what are you, like, a size 2?". So although I'm not a size two, at least not in pants, thanks to my butt, it just kinda made me see that it's possible that I'm not the elephant I think I am.


    It's also coming to my attention that my relationship with food is even more messed up than I figured. I probably spent most of today and yesterday panicking and obsessing over what I was going to eat while I was travelling, and dreading the fact that I might end up eating too much, and just anticipating. It's like I'm setting myself up for failure in my head. And why is something like "omg what am I gonna eat" the first thing on my mind, when I should be excited about the trip? Need to get my shit togetherrrr.
    Body image... It's a hard thing to deal with. I feel like a fat cow most of the time and I'm not much bigger than I was last year... I'm just up one clothing size.

    I'm the same way. I spend too much time planning the food I'm going to eat. Partly bc I need some balance bc of having type 1 diabetes. I can't just fly by the seat of my pants, unfortunately. Anytime I'm planning to go out if town, my first thought is about how to get a healthy breakfast.

    Btw... Your workouts look awesome! With doing the 4 reps, is best to gain strength? Right now, I'm just trying to focus on losing a bit of fat and keeping the muscle I have.

  3. #93
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    Driedmango is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by brookesam View Post
    Body image... It's a hard thing to deal with. I feel like a fat cow most of the time and I'm not much bigger than I was last year... I'm just up one clothing size.

    I'm the same way. I spend too much time planning the food I'm going to eat. Partly bc I need some balance bc of having type 1 diabetes. I can't just fly by the seat of my pants, unfortunately. Anytime I'm planning to go out if town, my first thought is about how to get a healthy breakfast.

    Btw... Your workouts look awesome! With doing the 4 reps, is best to gain strength? Right now, I'm just trying to focus on losing a bit of fat and keeping the muscle I have.
    It's crazy how we're always our own harshest critics, isn't it?

    And at least you have a legitimate health reason, you aren't just off your rocker like I am, lol.

    I did 4 sets of 6 today (or 5 sets on some). It's mostly to reinforce the strength I already have, and for endurance/form. My goal is to lean out and keep my muscle too. But i really enjoy lifting, which is why I do it. I figure that's better for me than forcing me to do something i hate to lose weight and then completely giving up because i'm sick of it.
    My maxes are actually a fair bit heavier than todays workout. They arreee:
    deadlift: 195, squat: 165 and bench: 95 (yeahhh i'm super proud so i wanted to brag a bit haha)
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

  4. #94
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    Quote Originally Posted by Driedmango View Post
    My maxes are actually a fair bit heavier than todays workout. They arreee:
    deadlift: 195, squat: 165 and bench: 95 (yeahhh i'm super proud so i wanted to brag a bit haha)
    I'd be bragging too!

  5. #95
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    Quote Originally Posted by brookesam View Post
    Show us pics so we can see how beautiful you are!

    What do you mean by, I just dislike everything else? Do you mean about yourself? I hope not!
    Haha, I just have a high opinion of myself. I don't take selfies, and usually am not placed in the situation with a camera taking pictures of me. Being a creature of the night and all. I have a picture of myself on these forums somewhere though, maybe you can dig it out!

    Nah, not myself, just bored.
    Longing is the agony of the nearness of the distant

  6. #96
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    Monday, 24th June 2013

    Day Nine of Willpower Challenge

    Sleep

    ~2.30 - I honestly can't remember when I woke up. Even though I always look at the time when I wake up.

    Exercise
    I was pretty sore today. Which confuses me, because I didn't really do anything new. Does PMS make your recovery worse?
    So I didn't go to the gym, but I did end up doing some Fitness Blender videos.

    I did this one in the morning:
    60 Minute HIIT Cardio and Abs Workout - Fitness Blender Tabata HIIT, Abs and Obliques Workout - YouTube

    And then I got restless later on and did quite a few kickboxing ones:
    Kelli's Cardio Kickboxing Workout - Max Calorie Burn Workout with no Equipment - YouTube
    Cardio Kickboxing Workout with Ab Exercises - 37 Minute Fat Melting Routine with Fitness Blender - YouTube
    Cardio Kickboxing plus Abs and Obliques Workout - At Home Bodyweight Workout - YouTube
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYGHc9mdH6
    Atleast I think those were the kickboxing ones. I did them from my phone, and I'm pretty tired now so I can't remember.

    Food
    Breakfast: 3 sunny-side up eggs (cooked in coconut oil)
    Lunch: Smoked salmon
    Dinner: Grilled chicken
    Post-dinner meal - I got really hungry: Leftover Lebanese food (mixed grill stuff)
    Snacks: Almond butter and dark chocolate
    Drinks: Coffee + coconut milk + stevia
    Calories: ~1500

    Thoughts and Stuff
    This might sound a bit silly, but I'm currently trying to really tire myself out. I'll be travelling for around 24 hours total after tomorrow, and one of the flights is 14 hours long. I have never been able to casually fall asleep on a plane. I always stay up the night before in hopes of exhausting myself, but I'm just always so uncomfortably warm and restless on planes. So I'm trying to exercise myself to exhaustion so that when Wednesday rolls around, and I'm on that 14 hour flight, and everyone else is snoozing, I can snooze too! Otherwise I end up just eating a bunch of candy/chocolate/junk, and I don't think I can handle that stress. I would've kept on doing more of the kickboxing videos today, just because all I needed was to stop for 5 minutes and I was all pumped again. I almost did another 40+ mins of kickboxing. But I didn't want to over-do it, lol.

    I've noticed that my skin's clearing up since I started eating mostly clean again! I've never had crazy difficult skin, but because of my recent crazy eating habits, my skin was starting to break out. And now it's calm and stuff .

    Well, not much happening today. I'm super excited to be travelling (and dreading the process of travelling, but oh well).

    Day nine done

    Question Of The Day
    What do you do when you have to go on super long trips and you know you'll be bored? And what do you do when you're tired and you just can't fall asleep?

    She’s a beast in disguise of a sweet song siren, that feasts on admirers so keep on driving
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

  7. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by CiKi90 View Post
    Whoooa! You worked out SO much today! I can't believe that. Girly, if you think you're sore now, get back to me tomorrow on how you're feeling, lol!! Those videos aaaalways make me sore, usually in my butt. I can't even believe you did all that! I am shooocked! haha.

    AOTD: When I have to go on super long trips, and I know I'll be bored, I bring tons of things with me: a portable video game console, a sketch pad, colored pens, a writing tablet, and trashy magazines. I even have a couple of movies on my PSP, and I can download some before I leave for my trip so that I won't be bored. Between having plenty of movies to watch, catching up on celebrity gossip, being able to write, and draw, and play video games, I'm usually not too crazy lol. But, I usually end up falling asleep pretty quickly, unless I'm excited.
    When I'm tired, but I can't fall asleep, it's usually because my body is all twitchy, and my mind is going a mile a minute. I don't know if this would work on a plane, but this is what I do: I make my body completely centered and symmetrical -- like lying on your back with hands on either side in the bed. Then, I take a lot of very slow, deep breaths, and I focus on each body part, starting from my toes and working my way all the way up to my head. I focus on the body part and relax it as much as possible, letting go of all the tension. By the time I get to my ribs/chest or arms, I can drift off fairly easily. Doesn't always work though, not if I'm hungry, or excited, or angry, or very sad... emotions get in the way of sleep.
    Haha only my calves are really sore, and I guess that's cause you have to stay on the balls of your feet so much of the time when you're doing the Kickboxing stuff. I've alwaaays wanted to do Kickboxing, so I got really into it, lol. I was even considering doing some more of it later tonight if my calf soreness goes away. If not, I'll probably end up doing a video that would be nicer to my legs. Fitnessblender videos are soooooooooooo good. Thank you so much for showing me them, haha.

    I'm actually the same, I've already packed my nintendo DS and a notebook to write/drawn in (and the pens ). I always buy the magazines at the airport right before the flight, haha.
    I think I'll try that, or picture myself on a huge icy mountain to cool myself down, I don't know. Yeah, my feelings are always my sleeps number one enemy, lol.

    By the way! What's your favorite fitness blender video?
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

  8. #98
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    Quote Originally Posted by CiKi90 View Post
    That's great that you do the same stuff as me on flights! We kind of have a lot in common, I think we'd make great friends in real life.
    I agree! If you're ever in Montreal, or Canada in general, you should definitely let me know .

    Quote Originally Posted by CiKi90 View Post
    Besides, I think that my favorite video and your favorite video would probably be different since I want to improve my butt and you already got it goin' on :P haha!
    Hahah I was sat here concentrating quietly, and I read that and burst out laughing. My dad was roaming around next to me and just stopped and stared. My favorites are probably the kickboxing ones, just because I've wanted to do kickboxing or a martial art for ages. They're all great though!
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

  9. #99
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    Tuesday, 25th June 2013

    Day Ten of Willpower Challenge


    Sleep:
    2.00 - 10.00

    Exercise:
    Couldn't make it to the gym again today, lots of packing and last minute stuff before I travel tomorrow . Buuut I did do another FB video. I wanted to do a really intense one, sooo:
    Fitness Blender's 1000 Calorie Workout at Home-HIIT Cardio, Total Body Strength Training + Stretch - YouTube
    That was the one I did! I definitely didn't do it 100% though. I couldn't do the walking planks very well, and I had to pause it here and there. I also only had 5lbs dumbbells at home, so the strength training part probably wasn't as difficult for me as it should've been. I hope I get to a fitness level where I can do that whole video without stopping, like the instructor!

    Food:
    Breakfast: 3 sunny-side up eggs (cooked in coconut oil)
    Lunch: A bowl of cherries
    Dinner: Grilled Sea bass and mussels. I also tried octopus, and it turns out I have a slight allergy to it (also to shellfish, but I already knew that). It kind of tasted like chicken, though.
    Snack: Dark chocolate and more cherrieees
    Calories: ~1350 - 1400

    Thoughts and Stuff:
    I'm getting into that super excited "YAAY TRAVEL" mode. I can't wait . I already know I'll be super grumpy while I'm actually travelling, but who cares, I'm just going to revel in the happy feeling for now. Nothing too exciting today. I'm probably going to still stay up all night, if I have something to do. I don't know why I keep doing it, it's not like it actually helps me sleep on the plane. Maybe I'll do another FB video later if I feel up to it (I doubt it right now, but I tend to get ridiculous rushes of energy late at night).

    I'm also wondering if I should let myself take a break from my challenge while I'm in the process of travelling. That doesn't mean I'd go crazy on non-primal stuff, but maybe not be so strict. Just so that I don't keep thinking "omg omg omg this isn't allowed, I really really really want it" and end up binging. Not sure yet. I guess we'll see!

    Question Of The Day
    This was actually meant to be yesterday's question, but I forgot
    What's one activity/hobby/thing you've always wanted to do, but never got round to it?
    Like I said to Ci, mine would be taking up kickboxing and/or a martial art.

    Day ten of the willpower challenge done

    It's empty in the valley of your heart, the sun, it rises slowly as you walk, away from all the fears, and all the faults you've left behind
    Last edited by Driedmango; 06-25-2013 at 04:10 PM.
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

  10. #100
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    honeybuns is offline Senior Member
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    QOTD answer has to be snowshoeing. I WILL make it happen soon. Life isn't getting any longer, you know.
    Of all the paths you take in life, make sure a few of them are dirt.

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