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  1. #171
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    Quote Originally Posted by magnolia1973 View Post
    Lord.... That actress would look fabulous in a bikini.

    I will READILY admit that I have many figure flaws and much weight to lose. I can point out every flaw in these photos. But here:
    http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3806/9...c808e88351.jpg

    The red dress. Now granted, that dress has limited usefulness. But it makes the most of what I like about myself.

    http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3808/9...9688358d9a.jpg

    What I say way too many women wearing. The best part? You can see my gut flab despite wearing huge pants and a huge shirt. But I see women SMALLER than me wearing shit like that because they are "fat" or worse yet "look fat". Or, they claim it is comfortable.

    http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5454/9...81554fc48c.jpg
    Now this is very comfortable, cost $10 and actually HIDES my stomach fat.

    So.... I got shit to hide. More than most of you. But "hidey" clothes don't do shit to "hide" your flaws.
    That ruching/bandage dress looks awesome on you. Next time I have to play girly-girl I'll go out and get me one of those. Can I wear it with non-high-heels, though? I can't wear girly shoes.
    Female, 5'3", 49, Starting weight: 163lbs. Current weight: 135 (more or less).
    Starting squat: 45lbs. Current squat: 170 x 3. Current Deadlift: 220 x 3

  2. #172
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    Can I wear it with non-high-heels, though? I can't wear girly shoes.
    LOL, try heels. Try like a platform or a wedge. You have shapely legs though, you could probably wear cute flats.

    No vibrams or sneakers or birkenstocks or crocs.

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  3. #173
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    Quote Originally Posted by magnolia1973 View Post
    I think we owe it to the next generation of women to straighten this body image shit out. What we say to girls is "Hey, if you don't look like a 12 year old boy, you are fat and will never find a mate, go hide until you are 2, preferably with long thin legs." I mean seriously, there are a couple of your I'd like to bitch slap because if you are "fat and flabby and ugly", then I'm the town heifer.

    Above all, on this site, this is about a healthy lifestyle and building a healthier self. If you can't lose anymore weight without doing crazy shit, you either need to see a doctor OR you need to recognize that your body is at a healthy weight and you get to make the most of it. Don't just sit here and bitch about losing 10 more pounds so you can be a 0 instead of a 4 and have Giselle's thighs because yours are "fat". If you just are unhappy because of past abuse, then go get some counseling and work towards a life of joy that doesn't involve punishing yourself because some guy was a douchebag 10 years ago.
    Yeah, I am so forum crushing on you right now. <3
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  4. #174
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    Quote Originally Posted by magnolia1973 View Post
    No vibrams or sneakers or birkenstocks or crocs.
    I vote for flip-flops, sbhikes. The rubber ones from Old Navy that are always "on sale" for $2.

  5. #175
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    Quote Originally Posted by magnolia1973 View Post
    I think we owe it to the next generation of women to straighten this body image shit out. What we say to girls is "Hey, if you don't look like a 12 year old boy, you are fat and will never find a mate, go hide until you are 2, preferably with long thin legs." I mean seriously, there are a couple of your I'd like to bitch slap because if you are "fat and flabby and ugly", then I'm the town heifer.

    Above all, on this site, this is about a healthy lifestyle and building a healthier self. If you can't lose anymore weight without doing crazy shit, you either need to see a doctor OR you need to recognize that your body is at a healthy weight and you get to make the most of it. Don't just sit here and bitch about losing 10 more pounds so you can be a 0 instead of a 4 and have Giselle's thighs because yours are "fat". If you just are unhappy because of past abuse, then go get some counseling and work towards a life of joy that doesn't involve punishing yourself because some guy was a douchebag 10 years ago.
    F*ck yeah, sister
    All of this.

  6. #176
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    Quote Originally Posted by magnolia1973 View Post
    Yeah.... that's sad.

    But here's the deal. Everytime someone with a good body says "I'm fat and need to lose weight" because they are afraid that their tits and ass might attract male attention, another woman hears them and says "shit, I guess I'm fat too".

    So what it comes down to.... is we have all these women who are size 0-8 that if they take 2 minutes into thinking about their clothes can look amazing..... calling themselves fat asses because they either 1. don't look like the 2% or 2. don't look like a 14 year old boy. If you are dieting to in essence, make yourselves LESS attractive to men, then at least just say "yeah, I hate it when I have tits and ass because dudes hit on me" (or just eat and wear baggy khaki capris and an oversized shirt). If you are dieting because you hate yourself, just say "I starve myself to punish myself". Whatever you do, don't say you are dieting because you are fat and ugly.

    I think we owe it to the next generation of women to straighten this body image shit out. What we say to girls is "Hey, if you don't look like a 12 year old boy, you are fat and will never find a mate, go hide until you are 2, preferably with long thin legs." I mean seriously, there are a couple of your I'd like to bitch slap because if you are "fat and flabby and ugly", then I'm the town heifer.

    Above all, on this site, this is about a healthy lifestyle and building a healthier self. If you can't lose anymore weight without doing crazy shit, you either need to see a doctor OR you need to recognize that your body is at a healthy weight and you get to make the most of it. Don't just sit here and bitch about losing 10 more pounds so you can be a 0 instead of a 4 and have Giselle's thighs because yours are "fat". If you just are unhappy because of past abuse, then go get some counseling and work towards a life of joy that doesn't involve punishing yourself because some guy was a douchebag 10 years ago.
    I agree completely. It's my dream to someday wear a size 8. I've nevern worn a single digit size and I basically jumped from the kids stores to size 13, then 16/18. I have so much weight to lose that I can't ignore it, but I cannot find a doctor that will take me seriously enough to check my thyroid properly. I went to a naturopath and spent a lot of money for the sole purpose of having thyroid tests done only to be told I have adrenal fatigue and sent on my way. It is so frustrating.

    I managed to gain 1.2 pounds overnight. How? I don't know. In one night I undo 3 weeks of work by having a glass of wine, I guess. I'm tracking on myfitnesspal and I wear a fitbit constantly and track everything. I sleep properly and never have trouble sleeping, I exercise 5 mornings a week, I walk at least 30 minutes a day, blah, blah, blah. I'm so desperate that I want to go back on phentermine so I can starve the weight off again even though I know it's only a temporary solution. Being 195 pounds and 5'6" SUCKS.

    Sorry for the rant... I guess I'm just having a bad weight day. Sadly, most of my days are bad weight days.

  7. #177
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    I don't really care what males or anybody else think of my body and I have never been hit upon by males, excessively or otherwise. I did not think I'd get married at all till I did. I feel that on the inside I am a slightly awkward, bookish, clumsy and slim figure of an old maid. I look in the mirror and I see a chubby matron who fits right in with milking cows and trading gossip by the water well, while holding buckets full of water and a couple of toddlers aloft. I don't think my misgivings about my body root in the present stuff, they are leftover from the 19th century... Sure, you have had the robust Scarlette O'Hara here, but I was nurtured on Dostoyevskiy and Turgeneyev, and I can't recall one book I have read as a teen where the protagonist was of a sturdy built. Brienne of Tarth was the first woman character I have encountered which was unequivocally not skinny, but look at all the shit she goes through. Maybe she gets to get the most interesting male in the book, but hey, that's just a fool's hope.

    I don't want to lose weight because I want to attract a mate. I simply want to look like I feel inside.

    I strongly disagree that the need to feel beautiful is about finding a mate (attractive is). I think it's intrinsic to want to find your reflection beautiful.

    I also dunno who it helps for one to beat her feelings into submission somehow and keep them hidden. It's like telling a B student that it's shameful to voice the aspirations for getting an A, because folks with C's might take it amiss.
    Last edited by Leida; 06-13-2013 at 08:26 AM.
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  8. #178
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    Quote Originally Posted by magnolia1973 View Post
    Yeah.... that's sad.

    But here's the deal. Everytime someone with a good body says "I'm fat and need to lose weight" because they are afraid that their tits and ass might attract male attention, another woman hears them and says "shit, I guess I'm fat too".

    The whole reason we should give a shit about being attractive is to attract and keep a mate. Now I know that I am not every guys cup of tea. If you like long and lean, keep looking. But let's just say that enough guys find me attractive to insure I will have a mate.

    Somehow, the media has decided that "attractive"= the tall slim models that are generally selected by men with no interest in mating with women to show off garments. Why the hell would you want to have the body of a 14 year old boy? Go to your average beach and the coathanger girl looks like shit in a bikini because 9/10 times her ass doesn't fill the bottom.

    Yeah, there is that 2% of women that is tall, lean with curves in all the right places. They can date the tall lean men with muscle in all the right places. I know for damn sure all the dieting in the world is not going to make me look like that.

    So what it comes down to.... is we have all these women who are size 0-8 that if they take 2 minutes into thinking about their clothes can look amazing..... calling themselves fat asses because they either 1. don't look like the 2% or 2. don't look like a 14 year old boy. If you are dieting to in essence, make yourselves LESS attractive to men, then at least just say "yeah, I hate it when I have tits and ass because dudes hit on me" (or just eat and wear baggy khaki capris and an oversized shirt). If you are dieting because you hate yourself, just say "I starve myself to punish myself". Whatever you do, don't say you are dieting because you are fat and ugly.

    I think we owe it to the next generation of women to straighten this body image shit out. What we say to girls is "Hey, if you don't look like a 12 year old boy, you are fat and will never find a mate, go hide until you are 2, preferably with long thin legs." I mean seriously, there are a couple of your I'd like to bitch slap because if you are "fat and flabby and ugly", then I'm the town heifer.

    Above all, on this site, this is about a healthy lifestyle and building a healthier self. If you can't lose anymore weight without doing crazy shit, you either need to see a doctor OR you need to recognize that your body is at a healthy weight and you get to make the most of it. Don't just sit here and bitch about losing 10 more pounds so you can be a 0 instead of a 4 and have Giselle's thighs because yours are "fat". If you just are unhappy because of past abuse, then go get some counseling and work towards a life of joy that doesn't involve punishing yourself because some guy was a douchebag 10 years ago.
    I was wondering if you wouldn't mind adapting some of this for your blog (or a direct quote, that would be amazing too). I'd like to write a post about body image on my own blog and reference some of what you've said here & provide a source/give credit.
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  9. #179
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    you have had the robust Scarlette O'Hara here
    Leida.... are you saying Scarlett O'Hara was "robust" or somehow a "larger" woman? She ended up damn near starving at one point in the movie, but was petite to begin with. So you look at those photos of Vivian Leigh and would feel large if you looked like her?
    scarlett Ohara - Bing Images

    Leida.... I hope that if you have daughters or young women that look up to you, that you are more kind to them than you are to yourself about their bodies.

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  10. #180
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    I'd like to write a post about body image on my own blog and reference some of what you've said here & provide a source/give credit.
    I could do that. Give me a few days.

    http://maggiesfeast.wordpress.com/
    Check out my blog. Hope to share lots of great recipes and ideas!

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