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  1. #1
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    4 degrees warmer

    The name Derpamix, by being so completely ridiculous and stupid, is actually the embodiment for the militant opposition of all establishment.

    I like caffeine, nicotine, and sugar. I'm both narcissistic and modest. I'm a walking cognitive dissonance. I'm both a misanthropic and a humanitarian, and I actually hate everything. I plan to one day escape to an island far off the grid, and use digital currency to fund my many addictions. Oh, and I'm a junkie, who brags about drinking, doing lines of cocaine off hookers and smoking cigarettes. I also eat 300g of carbs a day and weigh the same as a drug addict.

    I'm on a quest for immortality and eternal youth. In the name of science I subject myself to overdosing on untested drugs, which I'll write about here.

    Today's log:

    I awoke at the ungodly hour of 3:00am, where I begrudgingly awake to reality while peeling myself away from the warm embrace of my cats and my 15 year old futon. Feeling downtrodden, I stumble to grab my pack of cigarettes and bottle of whiskey, take a swig, light up the cigarette, hop in the shower and cleanse my body of all positive energies. I shave my face of excess hair, and continue on with my extensive grooming. After this, I hiss, and curse at the rising sun really loudly. I smoke again, and take about 65 different nootropics.

    Breakfast consists of a quadruple espresso shot, more cigarettes, a shot of whiskey, eggs and sourdough toast. As the sun rises, I get into my metallic coffin and head away to the place in which I sold my soul to become a mindless consumerist slave.

    Arriving there, I'm ambushed by a barrage of complete stupidity, and I quietly do my job, waiting for the solitary bliss of my first caffeine and nicotine break. My sanity is tested. After the break, feeling slightly better, until I'm again assaulted by more illiterate progeny while I impatiently wait for lunch.

    Cutting a long story short, I hate my life and my job.

    Stats check:

    Hair: Perfect
    Skin: Perfect
    Temperature: Waking 98.3, mid-afternoon 99.5, right now 99.0 all systems normal
    Cognition: Tired, sleep deprived, and feeling unstimulated and bored. Thought about perhaps tagging the side of a building, but didn't for some reason. I love street art.
    Mood: I dunno lol
    Total calories: 2.5k today, pretty low, but not feeling hungry. I'm dropping weight kind of easily.

    Everyone likes pretty pictures right? I've thought about doing this from the top of skyscraper too:



    And, I'm on an electro kick lately.



    Hi Zach
    Last edited by Derpamix; 05-24-2013 at 09:16 PM.
    Make America Great Again

  2. #2
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    Oh, and I was inspired earlier to search out this song:

    Make America Great Again

  3. #3
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    Bravo.

    You remind me of Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes, all grown up.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zach View Post
    Bravo.

    You remind me of Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes, all grown up.
    Oh man, memories. And, haha, you're absolutely right...

    Favorite strip:

    Make America Great Again

  5. #5
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    Haha, memories indeed. Great one.

  6. #6
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    Oh. You sound almost exactly how I used to. Before I quit caring about not caring. The trick of stoic zen is to invert all the damnation so it becomes potent apathy. Then you suck on that for about 50 years while waiting for the grave. I think, and it sounds like a problem, that you still care about life enough to be disappointed and bothered by the static. Instead, listen to the static and let it lull you until you are so mesmerized that even severe pain is like a good joke. At which point, you won't care that you don't care, the concept of failure is over-ridden by the fact that you are just molecules and atoms loosely assembled, and the differences between waking and sleeping are few.
    Steak, eggs, potatoes - fruits, nuts, berries and forage. Coconut milk and potent herbs and spices. Tea instead of coffee now and teeny amounts of kelp daily. Let's see how this does! Not really had dairy much, and gut seems better for it.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knifegill View Post
    Oh. You sound almost exactly how I used to. Before I quit caring about not caring. The trick of stoic zen is to invert all the damnation so it becomes potent apathy. Then you suck on that for about 50 years while waiting for the grave. I think, and it sounds like a problem, that you still care about life enough to be disappointed and bothered by the static. Instead, listen to the static and let it lull you until you are so mesmerized that even severe pain is like a good joke. At which point, you won't care that you don't care, the concept of failure is over-ridden by the fact that you are just molecules and atoms loosely assembled, and the differences between waking and sleeping are few.
    Are you the girl who draws Hyperbole and a Half, or what?

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knifegill View Post
    Oh. You sound almost exactly how I used to. Before I quit caring about not caring. The trick of stoic zen is to invert all the damnation so it becomes potent apathy. Then you suck on that for about 50 years while waiting for the grave. I think, and it sounds like a problem, that you still care about life enough to be disappointed and bothered by the static. Instead, listen to the static and let it lull you until you are so mesmerized that even severe pain is like a good joke. At which point, you won't care that you don't care, the concept of failure is over-ridden by the fact that you are just molecules and atoms loosely assembled, and the differences between waking and sleeping are few.
    Thanks for your input. I have nihilistic tendencies that I continuously fight with(that cognitive dissonance again), but it's difficult to not try to find a higher purpose in this depressing existence when you've seen true beauty seeping through its various entities. I think my problem is love, so, yes feeling. Being in love has a way of showing you things you really don't want to see, and as social creatures, it's difficult to fight against sometimes.

    I haven't yet come to that apathetic enrichment, hopefully one day I'll at least be numb to all the worthless troubles in life. You're right though, there isn't much difference in waking and sleep, with meditation before bed and induced lucid dreaming, I find many aspects of the day actually play out similarly to the dream state, when you look behind the meaning and interpret them in that way. It's all perception, right?

    YES - another journal to troll!
    Troll my journal? Talk about pissing in an ocean of piss!
    Thanks for the Velvetine track. Nice to hear some ambient chillout sounds with that dubstep bassline.

    I only created this account so I could say thanks. I hope you've got more from where that came from.
    Np, good to see someone with similar music interests. Check out the rest of Seven Lions remixes, and all of SuicideSheep's youtube channel.



    Your writings about the entrance of the, I'm guessing corporate consumerist company made me laugh... Because I work in a similar job, albeit only part time and not as a "career". Dealing with dumb customers all day who I don't give a damn about but being at the front of the store I have to give the impression that they are my friends of which I should treat nicely - So reverse role play since they are all miserable and blame everything on the store and staff.

    It's sunny today (for a change!) and I'm in for a 9 hour shift, followed by two more days of screaming kids because it's bank holiday over here. At least I get money to buy Raw goat milk though!!!

    I'm looking forward to your journal, it has a sense of "story of" quality. I like that
    Haha, I continuously wonder why I suffer through this nonsense. Do you feel the same? I guess we're all just biding our time waiting for some sort of epiphany and enlightenment. I think, I'm starting to come around though, just killing time and observing the pitfalls of society.

    Are you the girl who draws Hyperbole and a Half, or what?
    Shieeeet.

    Alright, panties are off.
    I aim to please.
    Make America Great Again

  9. #9
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    There used to be a bunch of assholes that lived on this side of the building here, but we systematically removed them like you would any kind of termite or roach.

    The dark side of nutrition

    I slept for a long time, which is good, day off, catching up on my sleep. I dreamed of scarlet fields and frolicking with my lover. I woke up in good spirits, rolled some tobacco, smoked a few cigarettes alongside its companion sludge coffee. Afterwards, I decided that I would have my bimonthly dose of repugnance, and cooked some liver in a concoction of butter, coconut oil and gelatin. It was abhorrent to the taste, as the description implied, so I thought to add some white sugar to it and chase it down with more whiskey. This made it more tolerable. Eggs are currently soaking in hot water for afternoon snack.

    Rogaine is making my temples burn, and made me sort of dizzy after the liver, which was alleviated by the sugar, thankfully. Fug. Also, on the rogaine, I had to take an electric shaver to my temples, because the hair sprouted out like weeds, and was becoming unruly. I shaved a bit more back, to give myself a cool mature hairline that will probably last for about 12 hours.

    My c60 is in transit, hopefully it arrives today since snail mail doesn't deliver on sunday or this upcoming holiday in which we celebrate our war mongering nature for yet another day. I hate all these holidays, do we really need them? What's the point? Need a specific day for everything we make up? Please.

    c60:

    C60 Antiaging oil

    When it arrives, I'll dose a bit higher than recommended and report on the effects it has.
    Make America Great Again

  10. #10
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    YES - another journal to troll!
    "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

    In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

    - Ray Peat

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