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  1. #1
    Derpamix's Avatar
    Derpamix is offline Senior Member
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    4 degrees warmer

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    The name Derpamix, by being so completely ridiculous and stupid, is actually the embodiment for the militant opposition of all establishment.

    I like caffeine, nicotine, and sugar. I'm both narcissistic and modest. I'm a walking cognitive dissonance. I'm both a misanthropic and a humanitarian, and I actually hate everything. I plan to one day escape to an island far off the grid, and use digital currency to fund my many addictions. Oh, and I'm a junkie, who brags about drinking, doing lines of cocaine off hookers and smoking cigarettes. I also eat 300g of carbs a day and weigh the same as a drug addict.

    I'm on a quest for immortality and eternal youth. In the name of science I subject myself to overdosing on untested drugs, which I'll write about here.

    Today's log:

    I awoke at the ungodly hour of 3:00am, where I begrudgingly awake to reality while peeling myself away from the warm embrace of my cats and my 15 year old futon. Feeling downtrodden, I stumble to grab my pack of cigarettes and bottle of whiskey, take a swig, light up the cigarette, hop in the shower and cleanse my body of all positive energies. I shave my face of excess hair, and continue on with my extensive grooming. After this, I hiss, and curse at the rising sun really loudly. I smoke again, and take about 65 different nootropics.

    Breakfast consists of a quadruple espresso shot, more cigarettes, a shot of whiskey, eggs and sourdough toast. As the sun rises, I get into my metallic coffin and head away to the place in which I sold my soul to become a mindless consumerist slave.

    Arriving there, I'm ambushed by a barrage of complete stupidity, and I quietly do my job, waiting for the solitary bliss of my first caffeine and nicotine break. My sanity is tested. After the break, feeling slightly better, until I'm again assaulted by more illiterate progeny while I impatiently wait for lunch.

    Cutting a long story short, I hate my life and my job.

    Stats check:

    Hair: Perfect
    Skin: Perfect
    Temperature: Waking 98.3, mid-afternoon 99.5, right now 99.0 all systems normal
    Cognition: Tired, sleep deprived, and feeling unstimulated and bored. Thought about perhaps tagging the side of a building, but didn't for some reason. I love street art.
    Mood: I dunno lol
    Total calories: 2.5k today, pretty low, but not feeling hungry. I'm dropping weight kind of easily.

    Everyone likes pretty pictures right? I've thought about doing this from the top of skyscraper too:



    And, I'm on an electro kick lately.



    Hi Zach
    Last edited by Derpamix; 05-24-2013 at 09:16 PM.
    Time is passing so quickly. Right now, I feel like complaining to Einstein. Whether time is slow or fast depends on perception. Relativity theory is so romantic. And so sad.

  2. #2
    Derpamix's Avatar
    Derpamix is offline Senior Member
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    Oh, and I was inspired earlier to search out this song:

    Time is passing so quickly. Right now, I feel like complaining to Einstein. Whether time is slow or fast depends on perception. Relativity theory is so romantic. And so sad.

  3. #3
    Zach's Avatar
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    Bravo.

    You remind me of Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes, all grown up.

  4. #4
    Derpamix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zach View Post
    Bravo.

    You remind me of Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes, all grown up.
    Oh man, memories. And, haha, you're absolutely right...

    Favorite strip:

    Time is passing so quickly. Right now, I feel like complaining to Einstein. Whether time is slow or fast depends on perception. Relativity theory is so romantic. And so sad.

  5. #5
    Zach's Avatar
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    Haha, memories indeed. Great one.

  6. #6
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    Oh. You sound almost exactly how I used to. Before I quit caring about not caring. The trick of stoic zen is to invert all the damnation so it becomes potent apathy. Then you suck on that for about 50 years while waiting for the grave. I think, and it sounds like a problem, that you still care about life enough to be disappointed and bothered by the static. Instead, listen to the static and let it lull you until you are so mesmerized that even severe pain is like a good joke. At which point, you won't care that you don't care, the concept of failure is over-ridden by the fact that you are just molecules and atoms loosely assembled, and the differences between waking and sleeping are few.


    Turquoisepassion:
    Knifegill is christened to be high carb now!
    notontherug:
    the buttstuff...never interested.
    Tremendous worms of a swarthy nature pursue me across the sandy blank sky. I stop to think. What the devil AM I up to?!

    My pony picture thread http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread82786.html

  7. #7
    YogaBare's Avatar
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    YES - another journal to troll!
    "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

    In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

    - Ray Peat

  8. #8
    Ballomar's Avatar
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    Good tune

    Thanks for the Velvetine track. Nice to hear some ambient chillout sounds with that dubstep bassline.

    I only created this account so I could say thanks. I hope you've got more from where that came from.

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    Dubstep - love it !

  10. #10
    Nstocks's Avatar
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    PrimalCon New York
    Your writings about the entrance of the, I'm guessing corporate consumerist company made me laugh... Because I work in a similar job, albeit only part time and not as a "career". Dealing with dumb customers all day who I don't give a damn about but being at the front of the store I have to give the impression that they are my friends of which I should treat nicely - So reverse role play since they are all miserable and blame everything on the store and staff.

    It's sunny today (for a change!) and I'm in for a 9 hour shift, followed by two more days of screaming kids because it's bank holiday over here. At least I get money to buy Raw goat milk though!!!

    I'm looking forward to your journal, it has a sense of "story of" quality. I like that

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