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Thread: q re: OT personal, embarassing matter page 2

  1. #11
    Paleobird's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Finnegans Wake View Post
    A lot of men today are in such pisspoor CV shape that it wouldn't surprise me that ED issues that might arise in their 60s, 70s, or later would come up (so to speak) earlier these days. Unhealthy lovers can't get it up.
    I think this might have a lot to do with it. Plus all the medical conditions are then medicated which doesn't help any. I know guys younger than me that are on half a dozen different meds for cholesterol, blood pressure, blood thinners, etc. All of that has side effects.

    Go join a Crossfit box and find yourself a healthy one.

  2. #12
    Derpamix's Avatar
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    it's because of this:

    nihil

  3. #13
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    We all have needs, but I suggest a round of "hard to get". I too believe you have been having a bit a bad luck, and possibly attracting the wrong type of guy.

    Consider this a dry spell, and relax about having sex.

  4. #14
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    Did you ask if they were low carbing? I bet they were low carbing.

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Derpamix View Post
    it's because of this:

    lol... TOTALLY!

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Derpamix View Post
    it's because of this:

    Ha! Made me think of We Will Marry Your Girlfriends.

    But I seriously doubt that has any relevance to the OP's issue. I also think the mostly likely problem (assuming it isn't just some horrible coincidence) is that the OP is attracted to or attracts the kind of men who have these issues. People can be incredibly savvy at enabling their own emotional maladies. And they can be completely unaware at the conscious level.
    50yo, 5'3"
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    GW- Goals are no longer weight-related

  7. #17
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    I've had similar luck with men. When they were young they went too fast. The older ones are too slow to finish the job, can't get it up or can't keep it up. Among the older ones I've been with it appears to be the following things:
    - Too much porn
    - Too much alcohol
    - Too fat/unhealthy
    - Taking old man meds
    - Too nervous

    The ED meds aren't really much help but the old guys always take their little blue pills because once they "fail" a couple of times they get all mental about it. The pills just keep them in that mental state and become a crutch.
    Female, 5'3", 49, Starting weight: 163lbs. Current weight: 135 (more or less).
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  8. #18
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    I was going to mention the alcohol thing too.....

    Depending on where you meet them, like in a bar, or maybe
    you're even on a 5th date where lots of wine has been consumed,
    that will totally wreck thinks in the bedroom later. AskMeHowIKnow.

    My husband and I have been together since 1996 and when we first started
    dating we could go out, party, drink like fish and then **** like rabbits later.

    Then in our mid 30's it was like, the man part would initially work after some
    booze, but then fail.

    Now in our mid 40's, if he even LOOKS at a beer, let alone DRINK one (or 12)
    before bed, forget it.

    The urge is there but physically, it just ain't happening.

    So, just wanted to throw that out there in case alcohol is involved.

    And I'm not talking stone cold drunk, either - even two glasses of
    wine does it these days.

    Julia

  9. #19
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    Violette, I believe it is a coincidence. A girl would have to be very ugly for a guy to lose his sex drive - especially when he could get a picture of what she looks like even when she has her clothes on, and he went for it.

    Quote Originally Posted by namelesswonder View Post
    I think you've had bad luck. Any dude who seriously wants to get laid will do it, barring mechanical/health issues with himself. My partner played the pool quite a bit in high school and the basic rules are "is conscious, has consented, has boobs & vagina. Go."

    And when I say "has boobs", it really doesn't matter what type.
    Hearing from guys online and offline, and knowing myself, I can say this: Guys are actually not so picky with what a girl looks like. Especially not in online dating, where women are absolutely more picky with what men look like. Women complain about "super models setting impossible standards," but when do they ever hear guys talk about "super models"? They are not what a normal guy would pick, especially not with that avian look they get from taking weight-loss pills. (Look at porn, which actually has to cater to a normal male audience; the women look different.) It has always seemed like a cop-out to me. Guys don't complain like that about Chris Evans ... but I digress.

    To get back on topic: the one thing guys want to see in a woman's body is a waistline. They will not say that though, because it is too obvious for them to have thought of. A waistline is the sine qua non for a woman's body to look attractive. It doesn't have to look great, it just has to be noticeable.

    Kind of like what I have heard women say about men's muscles: it is not necessary that they look great, they just need to be at least noticeable.

  10. #20
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    OP- you should try getting with an immigrant. American men are like the bottom-ranking globally for different male sexual indicators because of the extent of the toxins in our food and environment.

    It's not that weird though, I think, for your unit to go into hiding with a new woman. It happened to me when I was younger just outta straight and total fear, because the gap between my understanding of the quality of mate that I can land, and the reality of the hotness of the mate before me was just too unbelievable and overwhelming. Lookin life and death in the mouth is more terrifying than most men are willing to confess. Probably after one such fail, any follow-up attempt is tainted with obvious embarassment, which is a boner killer.

    You can come to SJ though and I will introduce you around; the dogs I run with will hook you up.
    "Ah, those endless forests, and their horror-haunted gloom! For what eternities have I wandered through them, a timid, hunted creature, starting at the least sound, frightened of my own shadow, keyed-up, ever alert and vigilant, ready on the instant to dash away in mad flight for my life. For I was the prey of all manner of fierce life that dwelt in the forest, and it was in ecstasies of fear that I fled before the hunting monsters."

    Jack london, "Before Adam"

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