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Thread: Naiadknight's chronicles page 565

  1. #5641
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is offline Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    Getting paid for all of last week, except Sunday. Did get hired on. Not sick anymore.
    I figured out what magic happy supplements keep me wired: the vitamin and the trace minerals (AKA by Geek as "[Naiad]'s Happy Bottle.") I ran out of my vitamin, and have been forgetting the minerals, leaving me sick, tired, and back to damn near square one. Getting my vit D back where it belonged prob didn't hurt.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  2. #5642
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is offline Senior Member
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    In less than 40 days, I've gone from being a drafter to production manager, including complete management of one of our largest clients. Not sure whether I like that or not, because my pay's only gone up a whopping $2/hr.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  3. #5643
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    namelesswonder is online now Senior Member
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    I don't think the pay increase is enough based on what you've said BBUUUTTT remember that $2/hr is over $4k a year increase...right? My math skills are absent today.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  4. #5644
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is offline Senior Member
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    Dunno, because I've also gone from hourly to salaried, and it seems like they're wanting to abuse that. I'm trying to bear with it and hope that we get over this hill, but if management keeps promising impossible deadlines, we never will.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  5. #5645
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    It is a compliment though isn't it? Particularly when you were overwhelmed to start with

  6. #5646
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    naiadknight is offline Senior Member
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    It is a compliment, but compliments and pretty words don't pay the bills or alleviate stress. For the position they're shoving me into, I'm being paid 2/3 the industry average. My boss is oblivious, and nearest I can tell, does very little work aside from doing a mediocre job of shaking babies and kissing hands for the company. There are things in the employee manual that still bug me.
    I enjoy my job, just not trying to do it as quickly as possible to get atop of a possibly unending mountain.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  7. #5647
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    lopisheep is offline Senior Member
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    Shaking babies not a good idea, so probably okay your boss is doing a mediocre job at it. Your job not sounding fun right now, but I have a feeling you won't let them abuse the salary position. They need to note the word SALARY. The hell with the prestige part.

    I take it you are safely home now and didn't get a migraine from cottonseed oil. We don't seem to have much cottonseed up here, but we make up for it in canola being in everything. I wouldn't be surprised if it's in chewing gum!

  8. #5648
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is offline Senior Member
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    No bitching, no bitching...
    I did manage to save their hides with the customer they plamed off on me, and not in a small way either. I pretty much talked them out of considering dropping us. Still not happy with boss, but I'll work around him. They aren't really trying to abuse salary anymore, that I can tell. If I keep up impressing them, in 6 months I may bug the boss for a raise.
    This weekend was a wash, foodwise. Was good Saturday, ate shit Friday, and ate mediocre Sunday (well, crappy, but pretty good for Sunday with the inlaws.)
    Still haven't been working out, unless you count roughhousing with the puppy and throwing toys for her. Need to kick that back up.
    Possibly Triggering to People with an Abusive Past
    I caught an article on Cracked about crappy shit you pick up in a less than ideal home (Hi, cori!). While it was an eye opener, it also drove home the fact of not being alone. I've been faking it so long that I don't even catch myself doing some of those. I took the weekend to think about it and figure out what my triggers for various issues are. I still don't have one for the lying. It's all piddly shit, mostly meant to make me appear tougher and badder (possibly created by trying to not get beat up as a kid in school?) I also tend to "chameleon" my emotions and all sorts of shit. Rather than rock the boat, I let people talk around me on what I consider delicate issues and think I agree with them. I may have a different opinion, but I'll be fucked if I say anything on those topics (a holdover from having to pacify mom and keep dad from blowing up.) I do tend to notice emotional weather, both of individuals and in a room. Geek has picked up on it, to the point that if I pause entering a room, he'll glance at me to figure out what's triggering it. I still don't like arguments, fighting, or anything more than civilized debates. It still scares me if someone is angry, frustrated, or depressed. I don't know how to fix either of those. I still have to have everything just so or its hard to get things done; I still have to be perfect, no matter how many times I told otherwise. Still worknig on that one, which is also part of the reason I have yet to finish a story since elementary school before things really went to shit. If it's not a perfect story, it means I did it wrong. Dating Asshole didn't help, if anything, it drove some of it in deeper. Therapy might help with some of it, but with this being a pre existing condition, insurance would leave me high and dry; and the therapists I've seen have not left me impressed. I think a large part of it is that emotions tend to get pigeonholed as weakness in my head and I try to shove them aside, making therapy useless until I can get around that. It's not intentional, again, it's another holdover. I recognize them as such, but it's hard to fight ingrained "training" in the moments I should fight it the most.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  9. #5649
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    namelesswonder is online now Senior Member
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    I found therapy really helpful to help break down some of my personal withholding on going to therapy. I care a lot about what others think of me, so I see going to therapy as a weakness. I'm slowly beginning to see it more as a strength. I suppose it seems a bit counterproductive, but going to therapy to talk about why you don't like therapy is still productive (just as an example). Then again, all of my emotional bullshit is all my own trauma. I was initially depressed purely from biological issues (hormones, I suspect), and that made a great foundation to build many years of bad thought-habits on top of.

    Do "mental conditions" count as pre-existing conditions? I mean, I suppose it would, I've just never heard of someone being denied for insurance because they are depressed, for example. Maybe it's just less common, or the issue is hidden until after they get insured Also not sure where we are in the enforcement of fuck-you-pre-existing-conditions-you-get-coverage-anyway in Obamacare.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  10. #5650
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is offline Senior Member
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    I don't mind going to therapy, if I can find one worth a damn. 2 of the 3 I've had weren't, and I have no access to the one that did work. I need one that can let me talk myself to death, offer a few ideas to get me heading in the right direction, and let me to come to it on my own, then offer ideas on how to make it work. I can't use one that does all the talking or tries to force me to go the right direction. Forcem e and I balk, even if it's a good idea.
    You may be right on the insurance thing, I haven't gone for anything mental related in well over a year. Obamacare may work in my favor again.
    Also, at the moment, while they can't deny me dr time, they can make it leave without pay, making it cost me to go to the doc, even if it's free. I really can't afford that right now. (No, these aren't excuses at all <.<)
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

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