Confessions of a Hidden Warrior
I admire strength in all forms: mind, body, spirit, emotions. Over the past 15 years, my inner dialogue has been overrun with a recurrent thought, "I used to be strong" with the implied ("Now I'm weak"). I loved being strong. When I was 14, I worked in a library and I used to stack hard-cover, oversized picture books the full length of one arm and up to my chin. I don't know how much it weighed, but I'm sure it was pretty heavy for one arm (and for a little 100 lb girl). I would walk around at a slow pace and shelve those books, reveling in just how strong my arms were.
It's mind-boggling and sad to see how something that truly is so important to me like strength (and health) has gone by the wayside as I've slowly turned into something so unrecognizable to myself. I seem to lack balance in an extreme way, for instance when I was strong and physically attractive I didn't give a crap about books and intelligence. Later when I was in college up until the present, I spent my spare time reading and learning as much as possible. I also became a graphic designer. With that came a lot of sitting, almost no exercise, and less focus on appearance... and of course, weight gain.
Now, as I approach 40 (August), I'm seeking that elusive balance I need in my life so desperately. I will be trying to incorporate a little reading, healthy eating, a bit of exercise, daily meditation, lots of sleep, and some fun into my life... and yes, of course, work, chores, and errands...
Paleo/Primal appeals to me so much because of the strength factor. I want to be strong again. I don't want joints that feel like they're going to give out if I run, or that make popping noises when they bend. If I had to choose between strong or thin, I would choose strong. I want nothing to do with having teeny little arms that look like they can be snapped in half with little effort. That's not me, I like meat... on my bones... and in my tummy!
BTW my caveman name is "Runs like a Girl," I find that funny.
I purchased "The 21-day Total Body Transformation" this morning. I wanted to buy "Primal Blueprint" but there was a glitch in the file link. Perhaps that one is for a later date. I've been on a health quest for a couple of months now, started with a low-fat/sodium/sugar eating plan and lost about 15 lbs, then moved on to Paleo a couple of weeks ago. I and my body like it much better, but I've been having some trouble with parts of it - it's a bit too 'loose', so I thought this more guided approach may work better for me. I tend to do well with strict guidelines, plans, and time-framed challenges. Granted I have no idea if this plan is that way, but I have a feeling I can accomplish something with it.
Plan of action: Read today through Saturday. Sunday take pictures and do fitness tests. Monday START!
Last edited by Brenda_D; 04-17-2013 at 07:59 PM.