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Thread: Primal Diva's Journal: From FMP's to VFF's! page 3

  1. #21
    MikkiB's Avatar
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    Just saying "hi" I'm in one of my "why the hell won't my scale move" moods, so it was actually quite refreshing to read about your frustration of earlier this month turning into some progress that you are happy with ... esp after reading a couple of the men's posts about losing 30 lbs in 30 days LOL.
    You might also look at fitclick.com - I like it a LOT better than fitday or dailyburn for ease of entering foods. It is free, too. I have no idea about their forums -this one is all I can keep up with!
    Mikki

  2. #22
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    So. The reason I have been gone is because I have been covering two shifts at work, and went away for the weekend with the girls to go opal mining. You definitely figure out who your friends are when you're stuck out in the middle of nowhere, in the Virgin Valley of Nevada. Ironically, you have to drive past quite a few cathouses to get there

    We found some cool stuff- poking around in the mine tailings, which is cheaper (and easier) than using a pick and shovel to gouge chunks of dirt out of a clay mining bank. The only major finds- I got a contraluz opal about an inch in diameter, and one of my friends found a gorgeous opalized pinecone. To put it in perspective, the grizzled guys in the camp next to us had already heard that "some lady found a pinecone!" by the time we got back to the campsite. They all came over to see the great find. I may have gotten in trouble for singing, "my pinecone brings all the boys to the yard...", but that was only after the fifth or sixth contingent of guys showed up! So I think I exercised restraint

    I must say, being a group of ladies in a somewhat male-dominated area, the gallantry displayed was kind of sweet. I think we only had to light our campfire once on our own. Yes, we were perfectly capable of doing it ourselves, but the guys next door had a BLOWTORCH. The Duralog Starter and fireplace matches never stood a chance.

    I did manage to avoid the obvious pitfalls- beer, wine, and homemade snickerdoodles. I did indulge the first night, vodka with some blue cheese-stuffed olives. I tried to sort of find a better version of what the other girls were eating. To this end, I ate pork rinds for the first time. With celery sticks, with cheese slices, and in a moment of desperation, in place of a graham cracker when I had to have a roasted marshmallow (with 70% dark chocolate) for a s'more. It was a one-time thing, and it was delicious.

    There were some dubious moments, as we were sharing food. I ate hot dogs, I ate too much almond butter and fruit. But on the whole, I did okay.

    Then of course, I weighed in on Tuesday morning (after the 12 hour return drive! OY!!!) and the scale said, "238".

    For the record, this is 1 lb. more than I weighed when I started PB on the first place. I was down a pound again this morning, but I am seriously getting frustrated. I am going to keep this up though- I have a trip to Tuscany coming up in a month, and school ends after next week, so I have three good weeks to throw everything I have at this, and see where it gets me.

    I do love eating this way, and eating VLC is something I have tried (it doesn't work for me.) I wonder what the heck is going on?

    Having said that, I did some "frustration eating" today. Just picking, not enough to make me sick, but I kind of fell into that "screw it, this doesn't work for me" mindset. I am guessing that the missing link is sleep (once again) and of course, exercise.
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

  3. #23
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Primal Diva View Post
    Having said that, I did some "frustration eating" today. Just picking, not enough to make me sick, but I kind of fell into that "screw it, this doesn't work for me" mindset. I am guessing that the missing link is sleep (once again) and of course, exercise.
    HAHAHAHAHA!

    Oh boy. I woke up this morning at 5 AM with a throbbing head and a general sense of feeling icky. I dragged and felt headache-y all. day. long. Thanks, carb hangover.

    The scale was headed back down again today, 235.5. Hmph. I stayed within my parameters today. It helps to know that if I screw up, I seem to turn into some wussy whiny lame-ass narcoleptic sloth.

    Today was a productive day, mainly because The Man forced me to make some decisions regarding our Italy trip. We now have hotels booked for Rome and Venice. Let's hear it for Hotwire.com! The hotels were fancier than planned, (his preference) but we got a deal (my preference!) We also headed to the bookstore and came home laden with maps and travel books- not strictly necessary, but we are not the most organized of folks. Thankfully, the home exchange villa that my parents will be staying at is very central. We still have to rent a car and buy our train tickets from Rome to Venice, but it is looking like fairly smooth sailing.

    Of course, I am worried about food. I realize that not every option in Italy involves pasta, but my past trip there taught me that all I can reliably order in Italian is stachiatella gelato. Definitely not Primal. I am going to aim for the 80/20, but also don't want to have to fend off headaches, crashing blood sugar, and crabbiness while I travel through la bella Italia. I need to bust out my Fluenz Italian discs and get going on the necessary vocab: like, yesterday!

    Today's Meals:

    Way too many pumpkin seeds (bleh)
    Mozzarella cheese
    asparagus and grilled fish with butter added
    1 serving dark chocolate covered almonds with sea salt
    dried roasted seaweed

    Fat: 110g (66%)
    Protein: 82g (22%)
    Carbohydrate: 45g (11%)
    Calories eaten: 1,481
    Calories burned: 2,519
    Deficit met: YES: woo!
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

  4. #24
    cillakat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Primal Diva View Post
    HAHAHAHAHA!

    Oh boy. I woke up this morning at 5 AM with a throbbing head and a general sense of feeling icky. I dragged and felt headache-y all. day. long. Thanks, carb hangover.

    hate that;/


    Thankfully, the home exchange villa that my parents will be staying at is very central. We still have to rent a car and buy our train tickets from Rome to Venice, but it is looking like fairly smooth sailing.
    Sounds like a wonderful trip. We did Tuscany last year for 2.5 weeks. Since you've been before, you know the drill......I found the bulk of the Italian diet to be exceptionally primal. Pasta was such a small part of it and very easily avoided. The hard part for me: cafes.

    Sounds like fun....enjoy!



    iherb referral code CIL457- $5 off first order


  5. #25
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    Thanks for the input, CillaKat and MikkiB!

    I am a little bit in awe. Especially after whining about seeing 238 on the scale on Tuesday. As of yesterday, I was right back down to good old 233.6, and as of today, 233.2.

    I have been IF-ing today. It would be really great to see 232 tomorrow.

    It is difficult for me to look at the amazing progress people (particularly men) are having with this program, and to acknowledge that I have been doing this since March and have only lost about 5 lbs. Then I think about the uphill battle I have had with my weight since I was 12 years old, and I still have to be grateful. I have never come back from a trip without gaining weight- permanently. As soon as the rules were relaxed and I allowed myself to have fun, I would come back 5-10 lbs. heavier, and it would never quite go away.

    My honeymoon in Hawaii is a prime example. Following CW, I got down to 200 (from around 270) right before my wedding 8 years ago. I made it from a size 24 to a size 12 in about a year and a half.

    How did I do it? Chronic cardio, diet pills, and self-starvation. I would have a Lunabar for breakfast, half a bag of (reduced fat, chemical laden) Smart-Pop microwave popcorn for lunch, and usually a salad with a chicken breast and some cottage cheese for dinner. The Man and I went out to dinner a lot- always have. I would go to my favorite restaurant and have three or four bites of Pad Thai. Then I would go to my gym and tear it up on the elliptical- 45 minutes, as fast as I could go, 5 days a week, rain or shine. The remainder of the evening was spent obsessing over the potential fit of my wedding dress, and frantically cleaning my apartment, because the pills made me so wired I couldn't sleep. I used to think, in retrospect, that this was kind of funny. Now, it just makes me sad. I know I have damaged my metabolism, and it is going to take time for my body to adjust to not being starved and abused in so many ways, in the name of health.

    Sure enough, on thee big day (with the help of some cantilevered underpinnings) the dress fit. My trousseau was all size 12 clothing. The wedding was great, we headed off to Hawaii the next day, and I began to indulge: by which I mean, eat enough to keep a regular adult human alive, three square CW meals a day, plus cocktails and the occasional dessert.

    My starved (but efficient) body took full advantage of this bonanza. By the end of the 2 weeks in Maui, my carefully chosen clothing no longer fit, and I never managed to lose the 10 lbs that I managed to regain. I cut calories, I took more pills, I spent hours at the gym, and nothing budged. In the end, I just gave up on the idea of seeing "one-derland" again. Through periodic dieting and exercising, I was able to keep my weight in check- but not under control- between 242 and 250 lbs.

    My weight has always been, quite literally, a millstone around my neck. It's made me self-conscious, which has kept me from eating what I wanted, going where I wanted, and dating who I wanted (back in the days of single-hood.) Once again, a lot of that is my self-consciousness. My parents were concerned about it, always willing to send me off to fat camp or enroll me in diet programs or send me to a psychologist. Tough love, bribery, they tried it all, (nothing really succeeded for long) and to this day, I feel like I embarrass them. My saving grace- I married a great guy, who honestly doesn't seem to care about my weight. That's gone a long way in my own journey to self-love and acceptance. I know too many women whose husbands and boyfriends harass them constantly about their weight to not realize how lucky I am- once again, how sad!

    Wow, this post wanders all over the place. I guess what I am trying to say is that I feel like I have stumbled upon something wonderful. Usually, a vacation would have completely derailed me, which was why I was so horrified by what I saw on the scale on Tuesday. Four days later, I am right back where I should be, with minimal effort, and am looking forward to continued forward progress on my weight loss and my fitness level. I am so excited!
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

  6. #26
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    Whoa.

    I am a little overwhelmed right now- a lot of things are happening really quickly, and I am struggling to pkay catch-up. The worst side effect of this so far is tht I forgot to go to work (it was a sub day)in the afternoon on Friday. Which is PRETTY BAD.
    I somehow managed to get screwed up because of the four day week. I saw subbing for 4 days, and went, “OK, Monday through Thursday!” and marked it on my calendar accordingly.

    Coupled with the fact that I kept repeating, “I am not going to be here on Friday!” and when I left on Thursday, I said, “I won’t be here tomorrow- see you Monday!” and nobody corrected me. In addition to this, I checked the schedule, and somehow missed my name (How? How?!!) but noted that the two other subs would be there that day (I assumed to cover because I wasn't going to be there!)

    So I took a nice Primal nap on Friday afternoon, and woke up to my husband walking in and saying, “Um, one of your coworkers called, you missed your shift today?!” I checked my phone. 4 missed calls. *&^%!!!!!

    So I am probably going to face the music tomorrow. I am dreading it, as it honestly was a mistake.

    There’s a lot afoot right now. The Man and I have finally decided to dip our toes in the water and look into buying a house in this area. Terrifying, because the prices here are about 300% higher than houses back home (three hours away). We have been living onsite which means free rent (yay!) but constant interruptions from tenants after hours about trivial crap and no yard.(boo!)

    We could use the space, the sanity, the permanent toehold, and of course, the tax breaks. And this would be the time to buy, before the economy fully recovers and we are priced out of the market, unless we want to live in a refrigerator box on the sidewalk. I am trying to think of it as an investment, but holy crap, that’s a lot of money.

    So that was Adventure Sunday. Meeting with a Realtor, looking at houses, familiarizing ourselves with neighborhoods. We did see one house that was workable- the big drawbacks are small bedrooms and a galley kitchen, but the positive is that it’s been on the market for almost a year and they are desperate to unload it- and also, the galley kitchen doesn’t bother me (it’s fully updated and has beautiful granite counter tops and stainless steel appliances!) and the whole place is cute and stylish, and move-in ready. The Man and I agree to one change- a new facade on the fireplace. I wish it were bigger, but if we could get it at below asking price, I would be thrilled.

    Compare this with some of the other places we saw- one with a crazy layout and no garage (but a gorgeous creek running through the backyard), and one that was great, but needed updating. Sadly, it was a foreclosure, and the people who lost their house trashed the inside before they left. Doors missing and kicked through, tiles gouged out…and the hardest thing was seeing the childrens treehouse and swings, hanging there abandoned. I feel awful for that nameless family.

    We have to go in tomorrow to see what we qualify for. Man, it’s nervewracking.

    I am sailing along- nicely Primal, with the occasional fried potato. Life without occasional potatoes is not worth living. Of course, I say that, and I am still hovering at 233. School ends after next week, and that’s when the gym visits will start again. Hopefully, the scale will do something.

    Today, I ate:
    Breakfast: IF
    Lunch: Frittata with 3 eggs, sausage, peppers, onion, cheese, sour cream, and scallions: and hash browns.
    Snack: 12 macadamia nuts
    Dinner: Lamb with broccoli (lots of butter on the brocc).
    Dessert: dark chocolate covered almonds with sea salt.

    Fat: 148g, 70%
    Protein: 66g, 14%
    Carbohydrate: 72g, 14%
    Calories eaten: 1,857
    Calories burned: 2,650
    Deficit met: Nope. Not bad for a Sunday, though!
    Last edited by Lady Grok; 06-07-2010 at 12:50 AM.
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

  7. #27
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    I keep flirting with the whole “exercise thing.”

    Exercise, however, hasn’t been flirting back. I have a WiiFit, I have a freaking wildlife preserve 100 yards from my FRONT DOOR, I have a gym membership, a pull up bar, jumprope, you name it, but I am just not feeling it.

    Until (surprisingly) today.

    A huge part of this equation is that I have been SO freaking tired. Since- oh, let’s see, April. I have been coming home from my job in the AM, and watching TV or reading (ostensestibly, to take a small break). Inevitably, I would fall asleep and then wake up at around 1PM, which is just not kosher, since there are a whole lot of things I need to get done, and the sink full of dirty dishes seems more important than moving the coffee table so I can use the Wii and hop around on WiiFit pretending to be a penguin. (True story).

    This morning, I decided to do an experiment. I normally IF mornings, but today I made coffee with heavy cream and downed about a TB. of coconut oil. ZING! I have had a productive morning, and managed to remain awake the entire time: for the first time in almost three weeks. Eureka!
    The best part is- I feel motivated to get out and get moving. It’s a beautiful sunny day today, so I am going to head out to the wetlands with the dogs, and maybe do some work on the container garden. We will see what my Go Wear Fit has to say. Exercise (the strenuous kind) is really the only missing ingredient, and it would be nice to see some pounds come off. I am going to walk and do some Wii stuff today, and tomorrow is Zumba: as well as an extended day on my feet at work.

    I travel this weekend, but I will have access to a pool: so I am bringing my swimsuit, as well as my Vibrams, for walking or hiking opportunities. I have been dreading this weekend somewhat. It’s a baby shower- for someone several years younger than me. I just hope nobody asks any awkward questions about my childlessness: it is going to be stressful enough seeing all the cute little clothes and the baby bump and the cooing without having to bear up under direct scrutiny. The worst is when they say, “Well, not everyone wants children!” Since I am (unfortunately) not one of those people. My defenses are already up: I’ve been mani’d and pedi’d, eyebrows are waxed, a cute outfit has been assembled. All that’s left is scoping out the locations of the bathrooms in advance, in case I need to make a hasty retreat. Bleah.

    Allrigt, time’s a wastin’. I am going to go out and soak up some Vitamin D!
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

  8. #28
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    Back in the Bay Area. Most of the time this weekend was spent with family: bless them. They are trying. My new way of eating freaks them out, as does the fact that I arrived with a small cooler stuffed with healthy food. I survived the baby shower: cupcakes were everywhere, and they used candy bars as prizes for the shower games. Lunch was a salad with grilled chicken: delicious, but no fat in sight. I had IF’d breakfast, and I was hungry again within an hour. It just reminded me of how thankful I am to have changed up my eating. Feeling hungry all the time while ostensibly “eating healthy” was the WORST.

    This morning, I was supposed to go out for brunch, and Dad insisted on cooking breakfast.

    “Hey, kiddo, do you want chorizo with some eggs? Kind of spicy? And fruit, you can have that, right?”

    I took tiny helpings of everything, all excited. Until I took my first bite of eggs, and realized I had been had.

    “Dad, what kind of sausage is this?”

    “Oh, it’s soy! Your mom doesn’t like the ingredients in actual chorizo, so it’s a soy/chicken blend. It’s lowfat!” (pause) “Do you not eat soy? It’s good for you, right?”

    I was shocked to find out that Dad had willingly purshased ANYTHING with soy: He’s a devoted carnivore, and tends to be suspicious of anything masquerading as health food.

    I explained a little about soybeans being the most heavily contaminated crop, and how soy in moderation probably wouldn’t kill you, but it also affects estrogen levels. I managed to get by with saying, “Well, I mean, that’s what all sausage is, right: it’s all meat- all the leftovers!”(I also ate around the rest of the faux sausage.) He at least seemed receptive, so maybe I will drop off the PB book next weekend. Considering that he is on statins, and has already had one bypass surgery, I think he needs to read it. Maybe Mom will too, and it will help her deal with the fact that one of the listed ingredients in actual chorizo is “Pig snout”? Then again, maybe not.

    I stepped up the exercise this week, and I am so glad. Long walks, exercise stuff on Wii, and I am going to build in stuff with weights- maybe shovelglove- over the next two weeks. The last day of school is Wednesday! Summer will officially be here by this weekend: I can’t wait.
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

  9. #29
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    Still plugging along. Still not losing weight.

    I have decided to soldier on. I may never lose this. and I guess I am going to need to accept myself the way I am. I am doing everything right for myself, and that's all I can do, really. The side benefits alone are worth sticking with the dietary changes.

    I switched my desk to a stand-up workstation! Part of the reason I haven't been around, actually. I have been on my feet a lot more, spending less time on the computer. As it is, with the amount of standing I do compared to what I used to do, at the end of the day my feet are aching. But I am seeing positive changes- more activity, and my legs are definitely more toned; looking pretty good at this point, so I am excited.

    Getting everything together for the upcoming trip- I am realizing that I have tons of clothes because I haven't really had to replace anything from last year. Usually, with each summer comes a new (and larger) wardrobe. Not this time! I've put together a bunch of outfits that should easily take me though the two weeks in Italy- all of them show my legs. This is a new development, as normally I would be packing up voluminous ankle-length peasant skirts. I will have to use the extra room in my suitcase to bring back a bunch of cool Italian souvenirs.

    We're still looking at houses, debating about buying something here or a home AND an investment property back in Fresno. It's looking like this is going to be a lengthy process. In the meantime, I am getting tons of calls about- believe it or not, babysitting. One of the mothers of the kids in my class asked me to take care of her twins for the day, and it seems to have set off a chain reaction. It will be nice to have some extra spending money for the trip! Babysitting prices here are insane anyway. When I was a teen and babysitting regularly- I got $5 an hour for two kids, and that was generous! The last day I spent with the twins (and a friend of theirs, so three six-year-old boys) was 10 hours, and I made about $250. I think it's crazy, but I am sure not going to question it!

    I recently purchased a book, "Gorgeously Green"- essentially, it covers a whole bunch of stuff like making your own cleaning products and beauty products from scratch. I have been enjoying looking through it, and ordered a bunch of essential oils so I can make potions. I really like the whole no nonsense approach. My oils showed up today, and I am ridiculously excited about them.
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

  10. #30
    Lady Grok's Avatar
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    Primal Blueprint Expert Certification
    It's 3 in the morning...

    My husband is snoring...

    GAH. I need some earplugs that work.

    I wonder what a cavewoman would use for earplugs? Acorns, perhaps?
    With Mark's help, I've conquered depression, acne, rosacea, scale obsession, migraines, and lethargy. Who knows what tomorrow will bring?

    http://www.theladygrok.blogspot.com/

    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread8215.html

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