Well, I smoke off and on, I'm not addicted to it at all. Right now I'm just experimenting with various cognitive enhancements. Smoking definitely has a calming quality to it for me, useful in a fast paced and stressful work environment.
where am I to find a voice that's pure and urging me to climb?
My thoughts would be that you are not getting enough calories over all, your carb intake is too low for your body, your thyroid is not functioning well (low selenium, iodine, too low carb for you), or that you are developing depression.
You mention that you do not feel rested in the morning and that you have a poor appetite. How long has this been an issue? Do you have any other symptoms?
Using low lectin/nightshade free primal to control autoimmune arthritis. (And lost 50 lbs along the way )