Ah, the between sizes problem. Hopefully the 10s will be just right, very soon. Don't buy them too soon though, in case you keep losing and they end up too big as happened to me.
Annie's Primal Highlights
What Annie Did Next
I love the anonymity of this journal. I know that though not many people will be reading the daily trials of me, I still somehow feel accountable to tell my little story each day. My activity and what I feed my body matters to me, and hopefully can give others support in the knowledge that their own trials, their thoughts, their actions in trying to follow this primal way of living are very much worthwhile also. Writing it all down, especially in a somewhat public forum such as this, makes me feel accountable, but has the added bonus that it does not make me feel guilty, or stressed. I feel supported writing in this forum where many others are going through the same struggles and triumphs...
I had a 'skinposium' this afternoon. What is that exactly? I don't know. Some made up term to refer to a day where we learn, "in a fun way", all about skin.
It actually was really interesting, I can definitely see myself as a budding dermatologist. What a lifestyle that would be! One of our patients had psoriasis, which he'd had pretty constantly on his lower legs (extensor surface), knees, elbows, chest, back and scalp. It came on initially about six years ago, and has not let up since. It's worse with stress and interestingly enough, sun exposure (which is normally a relieving factor). He talked about the treatments he's tried, at the moment he's on methotrexate and is using a cream remedy made up of coal tar, salicylic acid and something else... This cream he has to spend an absolute fortune on each month. We discussed alternate treatments. I suggested UVB phototherapy (which he hadn't tried) and went on to suggest a gluten free, grain free diet. Our patient actually jumped at that suggestion and said his friend had also mentioned that to him, but he (our patient) was not willing to go down that track, because, (*sigh*) he likes food too much. The doctor supervising (whom I actually respect a lot) went on to say that nothing was proven in this area.
The poor guy, but you can imagine my frustration. Unfortunately I am not yet a doctor, and as a medical student, my voice is not well respected quite yet. I can understand where these people are coming from, but I just wish something could jump up and give them the impetus to at least try a lifestyle like this one. If it doesn't work out for them, it doesn't work out, but they ought to be more encouraged to try! Conventional medicine these days disgusts me. DRUGS DRUGS DRUGS... give me a break!
^I shall stop ranting on now, and get to the hard stuff:
Meal- wise; here's the wrap up:
B- 2 eggs, 1 slice middle bacon
S- 5 pecans, 5 almonds, 1/2 pink lady apple
L- 100g chicken + 1/2 avocado
S- 1/2 pink lady apple + 25g Lindt dark choc (70%)
D- porterhouse steak with mushroom sauce (mushrooms, a little cream and chicken stock), pumpkin mash (with onion) and broccoli
S- 25g lindt darc choc (70%)
What an indulgent day! I ate around 1300 calories, and 59 carb.
Unfortunately I didn't get a gym sesh in today, I was studying most of the morning (we were told to come prepared for this day of rash diagnosing), and tied up this arvo at uni.
I'm very sleepy now. I think it must be my bed time!
Day 19, and I'm feeling a bit 'off' (there's no better way to describe it). I don't think it's diet related. It's odd, I got a good sleep last night, but my eyes just feel strangely tired for some reason. I didn't do any exercise yesterday, so I'll be stepping it up at the gym this afternoon, but maybe after an afternoon lie down. I'm going to try another IF tonight, seeing as I've had a rather big lunch (bacon and eggs!) and had a pretty big food intake yesterday.
What better way to get rid of that feeling than an unintended 6 k run. I'm not one for endurance, but found myself, at the end of 3 k, hardly having worked up a sweat, so i kept running. They'll be calling me Forrest, Forrest Gump soon I used to be a huge one on running every day (a few years back), but now days its more HIIT training and weights in the gym (which I prefer). It was lovely though to run outside in the sun and get my daily dose of vitamin D and endorphins! I found myself thinking over all sorts of things, and feeling more and more positive inside my head with each step.
Surely that can't be a bad thing.
I'm extremely grumpy tonight for no good reason. I've had a pretty unproductive day, so that is probably a factor. I've been interviewing potential new housemates, so haven't really got a whole lot of study done in between unfortunately. It may be stressing me out a little bit. The other thing that is stressing me out (first world problems...) is that I haven't got a birthday present for my boyfriend yet. I'm waiting on some money to go through into my account, as I'm currently left with $3.03 in my account. Hopefully it will go in by tomorrow (his birthday).
B- smoothie with blueberries, strawberries, whey protein powder, water and ice
S- 10 pecans, 10 almonds
L- eggs (2) and bacon (1 slice), 1 pink lady apple, 50g lindt 70% dark chocolate (now, thankfully, the block in my fridge is finished, so no more chocolate for a few days at least.)
D- pork chop + pork spare rib with apple sauce; pumpkin (+butter) and a few beans.
Exercise: 6km jog. (took about 40mins. i run pretty slow)
Calories netted around 960 and carb about 55.
I didn't end up skipping dinner, because I was feeling slightly stressed, and I know I have to be in the right head space to do the fast thing, or I end up eating crap later on. I feel satisfied and full now.
I plan on having a real "back to basics" day tomorrow. With the chocolate out of fridge, out of mind, i'll be eating the usual bacon and eggs, chicken and avo for breaky and lunch. Keeping it nice and low carb. I want to aim around the 20-30 mark.
I'm going to have to do the daily wrap up a bit earlier today (it's 4:30pm). I'm looking forward to a really nice night tonight. We've got a few friends coming over for some pre-drinks before we meet everyone down at the pub. I've bought a nice merlot I'm looking forward to enjoying slowly with some almonds and pecans as a dinner substitute.
I'm about to go on another jog. This time it will probably only be about 3k, but I'll be trying to mix in some sprints, and there will be more uphill stuff going on.
I tried the natural sweetener, Stevia, today in my tea. I'm not sure what all the hype is about, I only drank half, but that was enough. I would have preferred it without any. For some reason I felt the need to try it out. And now I have, I'm satisfied, and probably won't be trying it again any time soon!
Meals so far:
B: 2 egg omelette with delicious creamy (2 tbsns fresh cream added) fried mushrooms
S: 10 pecans, 10 almonds
L: chicken, carrot, tomato and cucumber
696 calories altogether, netting at around 500 (leaving room for wine!) and 34 carbs (just above what I was aiming for, but I had one apple left in the fridge. didn't want it to go to waste, it was so delicious!)
I'm planning on drinking the wine slowly- 3 glasses max.
I better go move now. It's going to take some motivation, it's pretty cold out!
Day 20 is going to be repeated today, because last night was a write-off unfortunately. Though so worth it! I drank too much (not red wine, vodka with sugarfree flavoured mineral water, i know primal nono... *gasp*.)
It was a very fun night though, and great to catch up with everyone before I set off for the sunny seaside for my 4 week prac this arvo.
Today it will be a sort of "recovery" day. I don't see myself doing any exercise. My head is hurting, and I've obtained a cold out of nowhere.
B- Bacon and eggs (i'm going out, so it's best to keep it simple I think.)
L- avocado, carrot, cucumber, creamy mushrooms (yum!)
D- meat of some variety, and veg.
Simple. Good. Will have me feeling a lot better tomorrow!
Will write later on today after my big trip up to the coast.
So day 20 was done again yesterday. I had an awful day on Sunday, I just felt yucky and hungover. I suffered some major pdd (post-drinking depression) and ate a magnum, m&ms and chips in the arvo. My body didn't take too well to this (or it may have been the alcohol still in my system...) and I had an awful spate of nausea and vomiting on Sunday night. Thankfully it was short-lived and I felt way better in the morning.
Day 20 (round 3)
I had very little to eat on this day, I had about three coffees throughout the day and a cheddar omelette (2eggs) for dinner. I haven't touched cheese during this challenge, but I was really craving it yesterday, oddly enough!
I had a Greek yoghurt with strawberries for breaky, an atkins bar for lunch (I know- not paleo, but I wasn't organised and had no time for making anything!) I had a substantial dinner of 2 lamb chops, pumpkin and onion mash and a bit of cheddar cheese again. Since I've been here I've done very little exercise because I've been tied up with prac work all day. I finished today absolutely exhausted (and hungry!!) hopefully ill get a bit used to the long hours and get in some morning or arvo exercise in the near future.
I'm feeling rather disillusioned with everything health wise at the moment. I think it's probably just the readjustment from a life of study and socialising (uni...) with lots and lots of free time, to 10hour days working here. I wasn't stressed or anything this evening, but have eaten a lot after feeling really hungry most of the day. I was craving sugar so so badly and managed to avoid all temptation during the day (cheese omelette for breaky; tuna and some almonds for lunch) at around 630 I had some chicken and veggies, which didn't fill me up, so I had some cheese and cabanossi and almonds, which still didn't satisfy me... I left it a bit but was still hungry so had 2 lamb chops and 1/2 avocado followed by a Greek yoghurt. Now, finally, I'm satisfied (a bit too well satisfied to be honest!) looking back I really should have eaten more during the day. Unfortunately I did'nt prepare myself.
At this stage I consider myself to have failed the 30 day challenge. BUT true to my own style, I'm going to pick myself up and try again. I REALLY REALLY want that sense of achievement after the 30 days. I've learnt SO much from this first attempt, and got 2/3s of the way before alcohol, unfortunately, was my downfall... This time around I know I'll need to avoid it completely (which will not be difficult as I'm really not a big drinker).
In terms of weight loss I think I have lost a bit. I think if I'd stuck it out the next 10 days I'd really have noticed more of a change. Physically and mentally in every way I was feeling 100x better. That's why I really want to get back on board the train ASAP.
My new goals:
- to lose the anxiety that holds me back a bit sometimes
- to feel confident and in control of my health and life
- to have a constant stream of energy throughout the day, that allows me to be in the moment and focused on whatever the task may be at hand.
- to exercise daily
- to be more friendly and open.
- at the end of 30 days I want to be <60kg again
- I want to fit into 'the' blue dress for a ball I'm attending end of may.
HOW am I going to do this? You ask...
"If you fail to plan; you plan to fail"
1. Chuck out the cheese and milk from my fridge. NO dairy for awhile as I tend to overdo it.
1 1/2. Groceries tomorrow morning- buy some meat.
2. Pack sensibly for lunch and snacks at work; I.e. low-carb paleo snacks such as nuts (but not too many! I sometimes over eat them too. Walnuts and pecans are the best for me)
3. Go for a nice long walk in the sun each morning before work. Try to get more sun in general.
4. Keep my stress levels low by doing a couple hours study every evening.
5. Go to the gym and lift this w/e.
6. Forgive yourself for stuffing up, focus on the present. Live each day.
That is all.
Here we go again!