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Thread: This is not a lobe song page 206

  1. #2051
    YogaBare's Avatar
    YogaBare is offline Senior Member
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    Sunday, 6th October

    Firstly, thanks guys, for all the support you gave at the end of last week. You've helped me so much, you have no idea.

    I went to the cinema with one of my BFFs last night (we went to see "Blue Jasmine" - it's really good actually!). She reckons that 'this' is surfacing because I have dealt with the other issues that were plaguing me: the ED, the depression, and the inertia around my career and relationships. Now they have significantly shifted, it's revealing what was probably the underlying cause of all of it.

    I hung out with YG for most of the day today. It was really nice...

    It's alien to me, because usually when I'm dating someone they're kind of all over me (mauling me), but he's not. In fact, mostly he won't instigate kissing me, and he's quite tentative about putting his arm around me, or even touching me unless I touch him first. (The first time we kissed he asked if he could kiss me ) I don't know if this is his usual approach or if I've created this big wall and he's the first man who's sensitive enough to notice it.

    Something has changed since last week: I don't want an open relationship anymore.

    I have a male friend (lets call him Hook) who I have a lot of sexual attraction with. When I decided open relationships were the way forward, he was the guy on my radar (YG still had the girlfriend), and our contact escalated. I even told YG about him at the time, and said I had my eye on him.

    Nothings happened between us, yet, and Hook doesn't know I'm seeing anyone. We're supposed to be going to the theatre this week.

    Literally a few minutes after meeting up with YG, we bumped into Hook!!! It was such a weird coincidence. The two men had a stand off (neither of them knew who the other was, but they could sense there was something between us all), and then when we were leaving Hook mentioned the theatre and then invited YG to come... LOL! It was ridiculously awkward.

    But... running into him clarified that open relationships are "probably" messy, and maybe building trust with one guy is a good first step for me...

    This makes me more anxious however because the open relationship status was a safety net. Since I've been seeing YG I've been on other dates, and they gave me mild reassurance from my anxiety. If I admit that I only want to see him, then I have to face my neurosis that he might decide he doesn't want a relationship and leave me.

    I think I just need to keep taking this one step at a time...

    [brain] [/dump]

    Also, weird house situation: me and my housemates are chronically single, but in the last few months we've all gotten together with people. Then, one by one, they all got dumped (the latest dumped one being the alcoholic... this is going to be fun ). I know this sounds crazy, but I believe in energy shifts, and I think my house went through one. Just hoping I don't get implicated in the reversal of the shift...

    Wow. I'm really letting the spiritual hippie out these days.

    EDIT: Heath: acne disappeared, but energy and mood are still pretty low. Weight gain is still there, and I'm now constipated. wtf happened to me?! I'm barely able to pull myself to work at the moment... I've been sleeping so much and not feeling refreshed. I'm really hoping tomorrow will be a better day energy wise, because I miss being where I was.
    Last edited by YogaBare; 10-06-2013 at 01:26 PM.
    "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

    In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

    - Ray Peat

  2. #2052
    girlhk's Avatar
    girlhk is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisepassion View Post
    I love all food. That's my problem! I am a fat kid at heart.

    Favorite whole foods include steak/lamb, eggs (although lately not as much), coconut milk, nuts (haven't eaten this in a while), anything spicy, mozzarella, specific fruits (pineapple is my fav), and avocados (haven't eaten this in a while either). I love milk but I am lactose intolerant and most stuff make me break out.

    I used to love pasta/noodles, pizza, cereal, and bread. I cut them out gradually before I even discovered paleo because it was making me fat. Of course all Chinese, Indian and middle eastern food thanks to my upbringing.

    I feel satiated on steak and eggs with very little calories but it is so expensive and time consuming to cook! Also I don't sleep as deeply on it. Carbs make me peckish.



    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk - now Free
    Hey, loving food doesn't make one a fat kid!

    Re just steak & eggs-- that would be quite high protein, and excess protein is supposed to be stressful for the body.

  3. #2053
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    YG sounds like a gentleman.

    Re open relationships, I would think it'd be hard for (some) women due to the tendency to be emotionally invested in a relationship/their partner. For me, if I cared about the person, the anxiety of wondering what I am to him would just be too much.

    btw, where are you in your cycle? Perhaps the low energy is hormonal?

    Constipation could stem from a mental/emotional block. A lot of mental activity drains the physical body... Perhaps some meditation or calming activity is needed

  4. #2054
    diene's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by YogaBare View Post
    But... running into him clarified that open relationships are "probably" messy, and maybe building trust with one guy is a good first step for me...

    This makes me more anxious however because the open relationship status was a safety net. Since I've been seeing YG I've been on other dates, and they gave me mild reassurance from my anxiety. If I admit that I only want to see him, then I have to face my neurosis that he might decide he doesn't want a relationship and leave me.
    Open relationships can definitely be messy. I think building trust with just one guys sounds like a good idea for you right now.

    Do you always feel anxious like this, or is it just with YG? For me, some guys trigger that kind of anxiety, while some guys make me feel secure.

  5. #2055
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    Well, that might be where the "jealousy" your sensing in YG is coming from. It seems like the two of you might both be happier seeing each other exclusively, no matter how ideological you want to be.

    I loved Blue Jasmine! I thought Blanchett's performance was great.
    Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

  6. #2056
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    Graycat is offline Senior Member
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    Dude, relax and take it one day at a time. You seem to really enjoy YogaGuy's company.

    Re. gaining weight: It looks like a combination of bloat and constipation. It should dissipate soon if it hasn't already.

    <3 yes, it never gets old

  7. #2057
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    Hey, thanks guys I should really not post when I'm feeling neurotic... weirdly all that confusion is gone today and I feel totally at peace

    Ironically, today a very sexy guy emailed me and asked me to go for a drink with him. He's been asking me out for about six months, but I was always too depressed (and "fat") to meet him. I'm really tempted... but realistically, what's the point? It's not like I'm going to shag him, ha. It would be an ego thing...

    Got back to the gym after the worst week in ages... only worked out twice in the whole week! Stepped on the scale, and I've gained 6 lbs!!! I'm assuming (hoping) it's water weight and other stuff.

    Quote Originally Posted by diene View Post
    Do you always feel anxious like this, or is it just with YG? For me, some guys trigger that kind of anxiety, while some guys make me feel secure.
    I actually don't feel anxious much with him... I just have my moments when I over think things, and then him being in a relationship when we met bothers me. When I feel secure I just put it out of my mind...

    Quote Originally Posted by girlhk View Post
    btw, where are you in your cycle? Perhaps the low energy is hormonal?

    Constipation could stem from a mental/emotional block. A lot of mental activity drains the physical body... Perhaps some meditation or calming activity is needed
    I think it's all hormonal

    Quote Originally Posted by ombat View Post
    Well, that might be where the "jealousy" your sensing in YG is coming from. It seems like the two of you might both be happier seeing each other exclusively, no matter how ideological you want to be.

    I loved Blue Jasmine! I thought Blanchett's performance was great.
    The jealousy is a whole other matter... It's complicated

    Yes! The acting in general was amazing. Great film.

    Quote Originally Posted by Graycat View Post
    Dude, relax and take it one day at a time. You seem to really enjoy YogaGuy's company.

    Re. gaining weight: It looks like a combination of bloat and constipation. It should dissipate soon if it hasn't already.

    <3 yes, it never gets old
    haha - <3 got old last week! That's why I started using dingbats...
    "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

    In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

    - Ray Peat

  8. #2058
    Zach's Avatar
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    Women need to quit with the weight gain freak outs. You cannot physically gain fat in a short amount of time unless you overeat thousands of calories above your BMR daily. A lb of fat is 3500 cals, your restin bmr is somehwere between 1500-2000 cals and add on top of that 500-1000 for daily activities. So you would have to eat 5500-7000 calories a day to gain a lb a day.

    Water weight on the other hand can fluctuate 1-15lbs easily in a day/week. Bodybuilders and fighters routinely shed a ton of water over night then supercompensate the next day. Doing 10-30lb weight swings in 48 hours.

    So yea, entirely water weight with maybe a few ounces of fat gain. Bottom line, forget the scale entirely.

  9. #2059
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    Quote Originally Posted by YogaBare View Post
    Ironically, today a very sexy guy emailed me and asked me to go for a drink with him. He's been asking me out for about six months, but I was always too depressed (and "fat") to meet him. I'm really tempted... but realistically, what's the point? It's not like I'm going to shag him, ha. It would be an ego thing...
    I just clicked on this and am a total newbie in regards to your journal. So, out of context, I read the above, and think...

    very sexy guy
    asking me out for about six months
    really tempted


    So why not?!

  10. #2060
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zach View Post
    Women need to quit with the weight gain freak outs. You cannot physically gain fat in a short amount of time unless you overeat thousands of calories above your BMR daily. A lb of fat is 3500 cals, your restin bmr is somehwere between 1500-2000 cals and add on top of that 500-1000 for daily activities. So you would have to eat 5500-7000 calories a day to gain a lb a day.

    Water weight on the other hand can fluctuate 1-15lbs easily in a day/week. Bodybuilders and fighters routinely shed a ton of water over night then supercompensate the next day. Doing 10-30lb weight swings in 48 hours.

    So yea, entirely water weight with maybe a few ounces of fat gain. Bottom line, forget the scale entirely.


    I will obey, Oh Leader!

    Quote Originally Posted by Nivanthe View Post
    I just clicked on this and am a total newbie in regards to your journal. So, out of context, I read the above, and think...

    very sexy guy
    asking me out for about six months
    really tempted


    So why not?!
    LOL. You've missed a lot Summary: I have a bf who I'm in an "open relationship" with, but he's not doing anything about the 'open' and neither am I really, and yesterday I said I'm considering changing our status...

    Also, welcome Nivanthe! Where does your username come from?
    "I think the basic anti-aging diet is also the best diet for prevention and treatment of diabetes, scleroderma, and the various "connective tissue diseases." This would emphasize high protein, low unsaturated fats, low iron, and high antioxidant consumption, with a moderate or low starch consumption.

    In practice, this means that a major part of the diet should be milk, cheese, eggs, shellfish, fruits and coconut oil, with vitamin E and salt as the safest supplements."

    - Ray Peat

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