And don't worry about the friend thing! I moved way across the country 4 years ago, and left most of my reallllly good childhood friends behind. Since then, everyone has been nice, but I still haven't found really close people to be around all the time. It's very hard and different to make friends where I live now. It's like a different culture up here, and they make friends differently, converse differently, meet up differently -- it's like learning a new social language. Also, a lot of the friends I made when I first moved up here moved away, so it's been iffy anyway.
Yes, I hope when I am more accepting of myself, I can find likeminded people. Also, hopefully I can start talking to my sister again, when she is in a better headspace, as well. She was my best friend, but I realized in recovery that she was literally killing me, because she was so sick too. I am trying to get stronger, mentally, so that I can be there for her and my nephews/niece again.
I read your latest entry, too, by the way. I just wanted to know if you've ever tried the leptin reset kind of breakfast? I don't do it exactly the way it says to do it, buuuut I do try to make my first meal really protein-y (like 40-50g) and it makes my energy tremendous! I know that you said you did horribly on very low carb, so I'm not suggesting that. All's I'm sayin' is that maybe your first meal could be protein-centric, and then the rest of your meals throughout the day can be carby, or whatever you like. I know you're trying to listen to your body and eat what it craves, though. Just a thought
One last thing! is, I was feeling awful yesterday after getting back from the airport, just horribly drained and everything. I took a huge 3 hour nap yesterday AND went to bed early. Do you think your crash could have just been from traveling? It always wears me out!