Amber- The Warrior Maiden Journal page

[amber_maiden]

Hi all,

A bit about me:

I'm 24 (well, next week, the 25th, I will be). I have two University degrees- one in Communications and Film, the other in Honours English Literature and Creative Writing. I live in the country. I'm a divorced single mom to a 10 month old daughter. She's amazing. She lights up my world.

I've been paleo for the past couple of months (since October-ish). I do have cheat days, because of the way my boyfriend and his family eats, but those happen only a few times a month. The cheat days have been decreasing, because sometimes I avoid eating with them.

Before I was paleo I was a gluten-free vegan. I was a vegan for 8 years, 2 of them being raw vegan, and 4 years of that being gluten-free vegan. Before going vegan, around 17, I had an eating disorder. It was awful. I then went raw vegan and went down to 76 pounds, and almost died. I got wrapped up in my ED and the raw vegan dogma. I woke up one day and realized I needed to gain back weight- so I did. Took a few months- I mainly ate peanut butter and hummus to do it. I then went vegan and ate tofu, all the gluten-infested fake meats, and sugary soymilks and soy ice creams... I went gluten-free after about a year of that, but still ate junk, though I went through periods where I ate no sugar, and borderline raw, as well as gluten free. I was very strict about being gluten-free when I was doing that for 4 years.

After giving birth to my daughter, I played around with being a grain-free vegan. I lost the weight very fast- within a month. And then in October, like I said above, went paleo. I have more energy than before when I was a vegan, and I like how when I exercise I actually see muscle development. I worked out when I was vegan, and never saw muscles develop.

I eat the standard paleo diet. Lots of meat, some veg (I've cut down, and on fruit as well), eat lots of fat. I'm currently trying to regain weight and get more muscular. I'm 5'6 and was 115 pounds 2 weeks ago, before I upped my calories from 2000 to 3000-4000. I'm currently (as of today) at 117.2. I've always been small, but recently my period has disappeared, so I'm trying to gain weight to get that back. It also disappeared when I had my ED, and took about 6 months to get back, after I regained weight to 120. I'm currently aiming for 120-125, in that range. I should also mention that I normally always eat more than most people. I can eat an entire roast chicken to myself, and eat other stuff later on. I've always eaten food in volume like this, however... it's not new.

I love hiking, and hike for an hour about 3 times a week. I lift heavy things about 2-3 times a week. I don't have a particular workout I do, or anything like that. I also like to do chinups and pullups, just because I find them easy and fun. Reminds me of climbing trees as a kid.

In the past week I've incorporated lots of coconut products in my diet for the fat and calories. I started off with making two batches of coconut cream (from this recipe. I added lots of maple syrup. I ate it over sliced bananas and berries), and ate all that within two days. I've never tasted anything so so good!!! And good for you! I also made coconut bark (3 cups coconut oil, a cup of raw almonds, 2 cups of coconut flakes, half a cup of honey, and a couple of tablespoons of an old Enjoy Life chocolate chips package I had lying around. I figure if OMGPaleo uses it, then it's fine. And I'm not buying more anyways. I then put that in the freezer, and let it harden, before breaking into pieces. I've been eating a lot of that). I think I'm averaging around 6-10 tablespoons of coconut oila day now, and have seen no adverse reactions- besides my face filling out and looking less drawn, maybe an improvement with my acne, and definitely feeling satiety for the first time in a long time.

[amber_maiden]

Have bene having bad sleep. I keep waking up at night, wide awake, or waking up every hour- even if the baby is sleeping. I think my body-fat reserves are low... or maybe I need to up my fat intake. Going to switch things around and see. Maybe my body has to get used to the amount of fat?

Today I ate a banana, some strawberries and some blackberries... followed by a steak, and 2 bell-peppers, and then some of my coconut bark... a lot of coconut bark actually. The coconut bark made me feel satisfied, however, so I think upping my fat is a good thing. I've been feeling like going running lately... I want this snow to melt!

I'm disliking/dreading later today. Seeing my boyfriend's family, and beer + junk food will be involved in some way. Bleh.

I'm looking into getting some Vibram Fivetoes... So expensive though. I also got a pair of Lululemon yoga pants of ebay, and some Run inspire pants of theirs too. I saved $50 and $30 respectively. I have to watch my money, though. I also ordered a gallon of Nutivia coconut oil from their website.

[amber_maiden]

Cheats of yesterday: rice, Caesar salad, a beer and a half, and a sugary french-vanila coffee. I didn't enjoy any of it. Though the beer was good.

TMI ALERT:

WARNED YOU!

I had a very smelly poop very early in the morning. I think because of the gluten from the beer. I have to be more careful I think. It's not diarrhoea, but my body doesn't like it.

Thought about IFing for my normal 14 hours, but decided against it. Ate at 8am, like I normally do. had some cocout bark- but then realized that I only like it because of the sugar content. In the future I will not make so much- I threw out what i had leftover after realizing I was going to eat it all if I didn't. Also ate vegetables and some steak. Feeling very bloated, and I gained 3 pounds in water weight overnight. Almost at my goal weight if I keep that on....

Found Sprint Vibrams for $60ish. Good deal?

[amber_maiden]

Got the Vibram Sprints in size 40, for $70. Not too bad, I don't think.

Yesterday I walked a lot. Didn't eat much either- under 1400 calls, I'm guessing because of how much I ate the night before- another cheat meal of poutine and sugary coffee. Today I'm low energy, but did a short walk. Will do a bit of weight lifting later, not really much though. Got in about 1800 cals today, despite not being hungry.

Thinking of switching up my IF times... but I really do find it easier to not eat at night/late afternoon, and eat instead in the early morning to mid-afternoon...

[amber_maiden]

I cut soy out completely last Sunday, the 10th. It could had shown up in the sugary french vanilla coffee I drank this past week, or in the cheat food I ate, but not much, I hope.

Since then, my hormonal acne on my jawline and chin has decreased DRAMATICALLY. I'm not 100% sure that it's from cutting out the soy as I have been taking saw palmetto for the past 4 weeks, zinc for the past 6, and b5 for the past 2 or 3. I doubt it was the zinc, but it could have been the b5... which has been making me dry. I'm going to cut back on my dosage of that.

I ordered red maca online, to see if I can balance my hormones better.

Found out the b5 is why my period is missing...

[amber_maiden]

Not feeling that well tonight.

Am changing my IF schedule from 8am to 2-4pm to 12pm to 8pm. I made t to 11, and stopped eating at 5pm, but I feel uncomfortably full. I gorged, and met my calorie requirements, but I feel sick + I couldn't work out that well.

Tomorrow is another day.

[amber_maiden]

Weight on Sunday was 114.
Weight is up as of Tuesday- 120. This could be from the eating rice on the weekend, however, and eating more chocolate... But I'm guessing most of it is water weight.

Macca- In love with it. Great energy boost!

IFing with new schedule became easier the next day, and now it is again easy.

[amber_maiden]

The last few days I've been eating too much, I think. I'll feel full- and hurt, and half an hour later want to eat again. I think it's because of the IF. I have to scale down the volume of food.

Have also found that I'm starting to look like I have gained lots of stomach fat? It's weird... Wasn't there before. Maybe I need to scale back the beef consumption... I'll cut back on fats from nuts and lower my carbs as well, and see what happens.

Vibrams arrived today!

Hiked twice with my daughter.

[amber_maiden]

Hate cheating on weekends. Going for 100% paleo now. Read on to find out why-

Saturday cheats- bbq chicken (had bbq sauce on it), cheesy potatoes...
Sunday: scalloped potatoes, cheesecake, chocolate... sugary coffee

^ only listed the non-paleo things I ate.

Broke up with boyfriend. New start now.

Looking into crossfit.

Next time will date someone more compatible. He wants us to be on "break" so he can think about things. Him having to think about things is enough for me to dump him- which was what I was TRYING to do.

[amber_maiden]

Monday and Tuesday I ate too much. I was so emotional. I ate two chickens, a can of coconut milk.. berries... beef... veggies... eggs... bananas... chocolate. I couldn't stop myself. I think I went well over 4000 cals on both those days.

Wednesday I ate better. Thursday and Friday I made a pact with one of my friends who is dieting (dieting on a SAD diet, but I'm trying to throw in healthy for him... trying to influence him a little. I keep mentioning Paleo), and we're doing two low cal days a week. He's doing 500 cals on the two days, I'm trying to stay under 1300, around 1200.

I've put on muscle, my weight has gone up, and I'm pretty happy with it. I've actually added way to much body fat for the look I want, so I'm trying to decrease that a bit.

Also upping my exercise a bit... More weights.