weaning and toddler nutrition page

[girlhk]

I posted a few months ago about trying to conceive while breastfeeding. Nothing has changed since, no period or any signs of periods or fertility. I visited my traditional Chinese medicine doctor, and he told me that I most likely would not be fertile until I weaned my daughter. She's 21 months old now.

My husband and I want another child, sooner rather than later. My daughter still nurses frequently, not always for milk, mostly for comfort. Her solids intake has greatly increased in these couple of weeks, so I'm beginning to think maybe it's okay to wean her, or at least greatly cut down the nursing frequency.

My daughter has never had formula and refuses cow's milk and all dairy. We don't have access to raw milk anymore, and no goat's milk as well. Does she need milk? She eats vegetables, fish, meat, with rice. Any advice on what kind of foods she should have more of would be good. Here it's common for kids to be on some kind of formula until 4 years old.

[eKatherine]

How's your diet and weight? I suspect that if your daughter is getting most of her nutrition from food, you may be running a nutritional deficit that could be remedied by an adjustment, perhaps just in calories and/or fat. I have heard it takes 4 years for a woman's body to recover from pregnancy.

My daughter was still breast-feeding at your daughter's age, and I know she wasn't getting much milk out of it.

Lots of women do conceive while breast-feeding. My sister and I are only 13 months apart, and my mother was always overweight.

But to answer your question, if your daughter is getting most of her nutrition from a variety of healthy food, she can get all of it from that food. But it would be a shame to wean your daughter and unnecessarily break the special bond that nursing gives you.

[PrimalWannabeGirl]

Egg yolks and liver! Great foods for young children. She doesn't need milk if you can't get a good clean source. Sounds like you are doing great with the veggies, fish, and meat. Avocadoes are great sources of fat and calories, as is coconut milk (the canned kind, not the stuff in cartons).

My younger son nursed until 3.....some things that helped me wean him included not sitting down (a cue), lots of activity and distraction, and limiting nursing to nighttime right at the end. We changed up our going-to-sleep routine a tiny bit and he was done.

I promise your daughter will not go to high school nursing. Promise.

Pea

[Sophaholic]

Hi girlhk.

Where abouts are you? In the UK a child isn't really on formula past the age of one (that seems to be the Health Visitors view anyway) unless its for medical reasons or the parents choose to keep them going on it for a while.

There are two ways to look at it:

1) If breast feeding your daughter is the more important thing to you right now, then stick with it. Not getting pregnant/your cycle back might well be to do with lactating, but it might also be because your body simply isn't ready again yet. How was your first pregnancy? Birth? Health now? The poster who mentioned calorie deficit makes a very good point.

2) If breast feeding your daughter starts to become an obstacle in your mind to the pregnancy you want, then it won't do you any good in the long run. Happy Mama, happy family. As soon as it becomes a negative, it's time to stop. There is absolutely - ABSOLUTELY - no need to feel any guilt over weaning your daughter if that's what you choose to do. You have done amazingly already.

If you can't source raw milk, can you get organic? She doesn't need it, no, but if it makes you feel more comfortable then as long as she physically tolerates it, go ahead. The two of you could try making milk shakes together - some milk or yoghurt & a few strawberries or other favourite fruit - as long as they don't turn into a staple meal replacement!

She WILL up her solid intake as and when you decide to wean. I had a friend who was worried her three year old never ate anything - the girl was getting three bottles of formula a day! No wonder she had no appetite, she was full already. Letting her get a little hungry wont harm her. My two will push for as much (raw cow's) milk as they can get, & if I'm too quick to let them have it, there is a marked decrease in their appetites & I have to scale it back a little.

You need to decide which is best for you & your family right now - nursing or a second pregnancy (assuming as I said above that it IS the nursing which is stopping pregnancy). Your daughter will not go hungry, whichever path you choose.

[banananutmuffin]

Short answer to your question: No, she doesn't need milk.

My younger daughter has always refused to drink milk of any kind. I weaned her around 16 months. She's two years old now, and has been perfectly healthy. But she's a major meat-eater. The kid will eat anything that used to be animal flesh.

Oddly enough, my elder daughter (5 years old) will drink milk like it's going out of style. But I can't get her to eat hardly any meat.

That's kids for you. It evens out in the end. Unless you're doing something really wretched (which you're obviously not), they'll be fine.

[zoebird]

Honestly, you can take her straight to normal adult foods at this point. She doesn't need milks/etc.

I would contain her nursing a bit -- start with specific times of day. Easy enough to say "it's not the right time now. we'll do it before bed." or something similar. She'll get it.

That might kick-start your fertility, and if it doesn't, then decrease again and see how it goes.

[Sophaholic]

That's kids for you. It evens out in the end. Unless you're doing something really wretched (which you're obviously not), they'll be fine.

Ha ha, yeah that. I think that's why any subsequent children after your first are so much less scary: you realise you didn't break the first one, so it's probably going to be ok!

[girlhk]

How's your diet and weight? I suspect that if your daughter is getting most of her nutrition from food, you may be running a nutritional deficit that could be remedied by an adjustment, perhaps just in calories and/or fat. I have heard it takes 4 years for a woman's body to recover from pregnancy.

My daughter was still breast-feeding at your daughter's age, and I know she wasn't getting much milk out of it.

Lots of women do conceive while breast-feeding. My sister and I are only 13 months apart, and my mother was always overweight.

But to answer your question, if your daughter is getting most of her nutrition from a variety of healthy food, she can get all of it from that food. But it would be a shame to wean your daughter and unnecessarily break the special bond that nursing gives you.

I'm about 105 lbs right now, a bit less than before I got pregnant with my daughter. Nursing her is more energy than I realize! I also wondered about the nutritional deficit, and started to track my food intake on cron-o-meter. I consume 2000-2200 calories a day. I'm 5'4", small frame, hardly any exercise except walking (working to improve fitness though). Yesterday, I was rereading some parts of the Perfect Health Diet, and found the part that advised women trying to conceive to eat 5 egg yolks a day. This made me think that there is a lot I can improve in my diet.

My daughter seems to nurse a lot because when she sees me she wants to latch on. But it's mostly comfort nursing. I'd hate to wean, and actually hoped I would be able to keep nursing her and get pregnant. My TCM doctor encouraged me to breastfeed till 1, but now says my milk is not useful for my daughter anymore, and is the reason I can't get strong enough to conceive.

I am not sure if she is getting enough nutrition from food. She eats an average of 4 cups of food daily, which is a lot less than what I've seen other kids her age and younger can eat. The toddlers I have observed around me eat a lot of bread, rice, and biscuits, in addition to a big bottle of milk/formula.

[girlhk]

Egg yolks and liver! Great foods for young children. She doesn't need milk if you can't get a good clean source. Sounds like you are doing great with the veggies, fish, and meat. Avocadoes are great sources of fat and calories, as is coconut milk (the canned kind, not the stuff in cartons).

My younger son nursed until 3.....some things that helped me wean him included not sitting down (a cue), lots of activity and distraction, and limiting nursing to nighttime right at the end. We changed up our going-to-sleep routine a tiny bit and he was done.

I promise your daughter will not go to high school nursing. Promise.

Pea

LOL, that's what I tell people! I'm starting to use ways to distract her, and half the time it's been working! Previously, nothing would keep her from the boob.

We only get canned coconut milk here (I've not seen cartons), but my husband is weary of them. He said it's better to make the coconut milk from a fresh coconut?

[girlhk]

Hi girlhk.

Where abouts are you? In the UK a child isn't really on formula past the age of one (that seems to be the Health Visitors view anyway) unless its for medical reasons or the parents choose to keep them going on it for a while.

There are two ways to look at it:

1) If breast feeding your daughter is the more important thing to you right now, then stick with it. Not getting pregnant/your cycle back might well be to do with lactating, but it might also be because your body simply isn't ready again yet. How was your first pregnancy? Birth? Health now? The poster who mentioned calorie deficit makes a very good point.

2) If breast feeding your daughter starts to become an obstacle in your mind to the pregnancy you want, then it won't do you any good in the long run. Happy Mama, happy family. As soon as it becomes a negative, it's time to stop. There is absolutely - ABSOLUTELY - no need to feel any guilt over weaning your daughter if that's what you choose to do. You have done amazingly already.

If you can't source raw milk, can you get organic? She doesn't need it, no, but if it makes you feel more comfortable then as long as she physically tolerates it, go ahead. The two of you could try making milk shakes together - some milk or yoghurt & a few strawberries or other favourite fruit - as long as they don't turn into a staple meal replacement!

She WILL up her solid intake as and when you decide to wean. I had a friend who was worried her three year old never ate anything - the girl was getting three bottles of formula a day! No wonder she had no appetite, she was full already. Letting her get a little hungry wont harm her. My two will push for as much (raw cow's) milk as they can get, & if I'm too quick to let them have it, there is a marked decrease in their appetites & I have to scale it back a little.

You need to decide which is best for you & your family right now - nursing or a second pregnancy (assuming as I said above that it IS the nursing which is stopping pregnancy). Your daughter will not go hungry, whichever path you choose.

I'm in Hong Kong, and it's common that kids take formula past 1, even up to 3 or 4 years old. The formula companies market very aggressively. My daughter is rather petite compared to kids here. The other day we met a 14-month-old child larger than her.

The best milk I've seen is organic milk, UHT and ultra-pasturized. She refuses it, as well as yogurt, cheese, etc. She eats beef and chicken livers regularly, eggs, and fish. She really likes bread, which everyone I know likes to give her when I'm not around. I wasn't worried much about her nutrition intake from food since she's still on breastmilk, but if that changes, I think I need to pay more attention.