Jordan Feigenbaum on the Starting Strength forum has his own Nutrition subforum. He deviates pretty far from the whole GOMAD stuff that Starting Strength emphasizes, at least for older people and people prone to overweight. He's got a lot of valuable information. You could just look through his forum and maybe find some answers he gives to overweight people and to women. I think he would tell you that you CAN lose weight and gain strength, just that strength gains will be slower. Nothing wrong with slower. He usually recommends something close to paleo for overweight people, with low carb on off days, more carbs on the workout days. Nothing out of the ordinary, really. I suppose you could also try the "rapid fat loss" thing, but I think that sounds horrible.
Female, 5'3", 49, Starting weight: 163lbs. Current weight: 135 (more or less).
Starting squat: 45lbs. Current squat: 170 x 3. Current Deadlift: 215 x 3