Confessions of member struggling page 3

[YogaBare]

Hey Lilith,

I just know from experience that if you have a history of eating disorders, chances are your binges are not induced by nutrient deficiencies. When I started Primal I wanted so badly to just offload my history of ED onto low blood sugar but it wasn't the case. I think for most people, EDs - or any addictive behaviours - has emotional roots, and changing external factors (eg. diet) can give temporary alleviation because it gives the person something to focus on. Any time my eating disorder got really out of control, the only thing that would break the cycle was making some drastic change in my life. Moving country / changing job / going on a "detox". Those changes were big enough distractions for me to funnel my attention into, so I could ignore the anxiety and sadness gnawing at my heart.

Addictions are crutches that distract the addict from what's going on inside themselves. We project it all onto an external substance, and the substance then becomes the problem.

If you already think that this is caused by stress then I think you know the answer to the Mg supplementation question Seriously, I shoved so many supplements down my throat while attempting to smother the cravings... Didn't help!

It makes complete sense to me that just recognising that you were stressed is making you calmer. Our worries and fears are like little demons that demand our attention. Ignore them and they turn nasty. Acknowledge them and they grow quiet. Give them love, and perhaps they transform into something else. It's hard work but if you can own it, you've already come a long way

[Lilith]

Thanks YogaBare, that makes a lot of sense to me. I need to learn to just 'stop' once in a while and assess what is going on for me.

Like you say, finding other things to focus on is part of the problem when the best thing to do is focus on yourself.

[YogaBare]

Thanks YogaBare, that makes a lot of sense to me. I need to learn to just 'stop' once in a while and assess what is going on for me.

Like you say, finding other things to focus on is part of the problem when the best thing to do is focus on yourself.

Great Good luck.

Saying all that, do make sure that you're eating a balanced diet (not lacking any macronutrients) and that you're getting enough exercise. These things alone will not stop you binging, but I think of it as housekeeping

[Dragonfly]

Ummm, YogaBare... You may want to check out Dr. Emily Deans blog before you dismiss the effect of micro-nutrient deficiencies on our mental/emotional health.

Here's one example post (you can do a search for eating disorder or anorexia and find more...) Evolutionary Psychiatry: Zinc Clarity

Personally, I've helped plenty of clients with emotional issues, including binging, by addressing nutrient deficiencies alongside emotional issues. IME, If Lilith has all the building blocks her body needs to operate optimally, she will be more resilient and able to deal with stress better.

[YogaBare]

Personally, I've helped plenty of clients with emotional issues, including binging, by addressing nutrient deficiencies alongside emotional issues. IME, If Lilith has all the building blocks her body needs to operate optimally, she will be more resilient and able to deal with stress better.

I totally agree with you! I was contesting the advice that it was purely a nutrient deficiency. Stress can stop us from absorbing nutrients, which can have a cyclical effect (nutrient deficiencies leading to more stress, as you said).

It's multifactoral, no doubt. I just know there's a tendency with EDs (or any addiction) to look for a quick fix. For most people, addictions have emotional roots.

Thanks for the links

[Monk]

I think the remaining bread, food items are okay, sometimes transitioning is easier than cold turkey. Finish what you have that isn't primal, just dont buy any replacements after it is gone.

[Knifegill]

What size bar was it though?

My Lindt one was 10 squares and the other one was 15. It's not your 'usual' size bar of 6-7 squares.

The usual $3.00 size, about 1/4 inch thick and 3" by about 8", depending on which brand, what's on sale, etc. I like the Green and Black's super dark, I think it's 85%~ish and has no soy lecithin. Often on sale at Fred Meyer for $2.50 per bar!

Part of mastering an ED is to stop being hungry and to stop thinking so much about food. If your belly is full of good food, mission accomplished.

[spuggygirl]

I have found, over time, that binges became less frequent, and less over the top until they stopped altogether.

For me, I think there were a few main reasons for the improvements:

1. First, I stopped dieting - which meant that I stopped depriving myself. When I took away the 'good and bad', 'can and can't', certain foods became a lot less desirable.
2. The foods that I might have previously binged on - I made sure were really high quality. High quality generally means it takes less to satisfy the craving.
3. I started thinking a lot more about how I wanted food to make me feel. Eventually I came to the conclusion that I want it to make me feel healthy, alive, energetic and vigorous. This, to me, is much preferable to feeling momentarily comforted by a binge, followed by days of feeling fat, lethargic and the guilt and self loathing that goes with it.
4. And finally I discovered primal which was in all likelihood the culmination of the three points above. These days I feel so damned good that I'm really unlikely to jeapordise that.

All of the above has taken me somewhere in the region of 5 years, but I got there eventually and it feels amazing. It has been at times hard work and there have been many ups and downs. But the biggest key is that when I had a slip up, I just accepted it, tried to take a lesson from it and moved on...no guilt or self loathing...just something that happened and has now passed.

[magnolia1973]

Binge eating....
I think it is often caused by a lack of nutrients, but can also be a habit or a coping mechanism. I could not address this issue under the Primal plan (took advantage of 20%!). I did a Whole 30 and learned very quickly about just how much I rely on food to "soothe" myself. Primal allows that 20% and I always took advantage- dark chocolate, sugar in coffee, ice cream etc. Whole 30 does not allow sugar at all.

I identified "habitual eating"- for me, that is a sweet after dinner. When I only allowed myself fruit as a "sweet" that habit quickly diminished. Now I know if I want a sweet after dinner, it's likely just habit.

I identified "eating because I am bored and frustrated". Easy enough, started taking a walk break.

I identified food "boredom", ie, if I eat a burger and spinach one more time I will kill you. Easy enough- it doesn't have to mean a doughnut. How about duck, lamb, a stew, mangoes, pineapple, a rutabaga..... That helps me a lot. I have Whole 30 treat foods... I love borabora meatball day!

I identified emotional eating. Replaced with shopping, which is not the best substitute, but I also got rid of some problematic people in my life. Basically without sugar, people who mistreated me pissed me off and I called them on it instead of buying Haagen Daz and taking their bullshit. (Be prepared to lose "friends", but if they can't walk on you anymore and leave your life, they weren't friends to being with.)

It's been good. Now I recognize when I really want sweets versus when it is motivated by something other than a desire to eat something tasty. I want a sweet (ie, pancakes, cupcake, ice cream, paleo sweet) maybe once or twice a week now versus 2 times a day. I don't always "give in" (especially not when on Whole 30). I gave myself a free pass to eat whatever on vacation and actually only had dessert one time, on Valentine's day. Now I'm back and happily back to eating Whole 30 to try and lose more weight. It does take some white knuckle avoidance of certain foods, but realize that is temporary. You can return to occasional sweets.

It's worth making an effort to really understand why you want specific foods, whether it is nutrients, boredom etc.

[Lilith]

Part of mastering an ED is to stop being hungry and to stop thinking so much about food. If your belly is full of good food, mission accomplished.

I'm afraid it's not like this for me - I binge even if I am full from a nutritious meal. And the binges, I have now realised, have not been for lack of nutrients, they have been because I am stressed and because I have long had negative coping mechanisms for dealing with stress.

I talked about this in therapy (been in and out of therapy for years for various things lol) and I haven't had one binge since the ones I posted about on here. This is because I have identified my stresses and that goes a long way towards preventing *my* binges (I say 'my' because it might not be the same for everyone). I have also allowed myself to cry over my stresses - since as long as I can remember I have always bottled them up and 'pushed them down' with either food or alcohol.

However, as time goes on I am learning to be easier on myself and acknowledge my feelings rather than pushing them down, so it's all good