My mother is dying page 2

[Bosnic]

Tell her to eat crappy foods, maybe she'll do the opposite.

[NZ primal Gwamma]

rphlslv - please I implore you - go and enjoy life. Life is too short. Mum doesn't sound like she wants help, but why sacrifice your happiness trying to change mum. We all make choices as an adult - I am hoping that you choose you go and enjoy life !!!!!

have fun ............................

G x

[Aili]

My mother was an alcholic and died of it, which took 25 years. We all knew for at least 15 years that she would die of alcohol. She could not quit, and there was nothing we could do.

We all did learn that each person's life is their own. I feel that it is wrong to try in any way to force your beliefs and decisions upon others, even when you know they will die of their decisions. It's not your life.

Love her. You will miss her terribly later no matter what she does. Treat her as she wants to be treated, not as you think best.
Make her shine in her own eyes.

This is interesting re your Mom's inability to quit booze. Before paleo, at times I would crave alcohol, especially when I was tired and feeling down because of it. I worried about that. After I cut grains from my life, I also no longer have ANY craving for anything, thankfully including alcohol. So when I hear of others, I wonder if the problem is carbs.

[Crabbcakes]

My dad is like that, and my mother is still waiting on him hand and foot, and in my opinion, has long since become completely codependent.

Let me tell you this...

1. You are a wonderful daughter and person. Proof - giving a shit enough to try to find help. Repeatedly.
2. You tried your damnedest, but she ain't willing to be open to one iota of advice, not ever. Believe that.
3. YOU DESERVE YOUR OWN LIFE AT THIS POINT. WE ALL ARE SUPPOSEDLY ADULTS - TREAT HER LIKE ONE AND LEAVE HER TO THE CONSEQUENCES OF HER OWN DECISIONS.
4. You won't be her favorite person at all for excusing yourself from that mind game, on which I am sure she depends, so be prepared for the possibility of some hurricane force shit when you bail.
5. You will still be a wonderful daughter and person after you refuse to get sucked in.
6. You will absolutely, definitely, positively feel so much lighter and freer and happier after you do this, and you DO deserve to be free from this worry.

I wish you all the best in this. Just a thought - if you do not do this now the situation will only be so much worse for you if you have hopes/plans to start your own family some day. She will just be the biggest pain in the ass baby of them all, when your time is then focused on your own children instead of her.

If you are in the mood to, just to see how she reacts, you could try to screw with her head some by just giving her exactly what she wants - the absolute shittiest foodstuffs you can source... Velveeta cheese, dollar store hot dogs, sugared and caffeinated soda, cheap cream-filled cookies, boxed Mac n'cheese... Not that this will "fix" her in the slightest, because only a highly experienced psychiatrist can do that (maybe), but you might gain some small insight about her.

Please, please, live your own life now. At least, try it - I really think you will find it so much healthier and happier.

[EagleRiverDee]

My mom is slowly killing herself with alcohol and tobacco. There's nothing I can do about it. She doesn't want me to do anything about it. My Dad is going Paleo, after seeing the success I've had on PB, but he's not going to convince my mom to do it. That's just how it is. A person has to be willing to take that step towards health, and if they won't, you can't force them. Just love them while they're here.