Has anyone else been in a situation like I am? Did you change your partner's mind somehow?
I have and am in a situation like yours. I have not had much success and if anything any effort to change his mind has been more of a set-back than an advancement so I don't try anymore.
What I do is this:
- Cook low and moderate fat foods (chicken, fish, lean steak, steamed vegetables) most of the time and serve butter on the side. I like to watch him take the butter when sometimes I don't even take any. I just smile to myself on the inside.
- When I do cook something fatty (lamb, pork) I let him select the portion size. He always takes the smallest amount. He's not too upset because I always make steamed veggies so that makes him feel virtuous.
- If he serves things I don't want to eat, I don't eat them. I don't eat the pasta but I eat the sauce over a sweet potato, for example. I might take ONE of something I don't want to eat so he doesn't get his feelings hurt, and then I make something else to eat later. I also will eat the Indian food (lentils and chickpeas) and I'm okay with the big cheese and cracker nosh-sessions he's fond of. I'll have the cheese, herring, olives and he can have the crackers and hummus.
- Now and then I'll make two separate meat items. A big steak or hunk of liver for me and a leftover chicken breast for him. He doesn't mind at all. He thinks I'm being extra NICE to him. Can you believe it? I'm getting the steak and he thinks I'm being generous. Ha ha!!
I noticed he almost always breaks out his nuts and chips after dinner for a giant pig-out session, so it's not like he's truly satisfied with the low-fat menu he demands, but I just go along with whatever inconsistencies in his totally dug-in position to keep the peace. Slowly I'm winning, though, and I don't think he's noticing.
Female, 5'3", 50, Max squat: 202.5lbs. Max deadlift: 225 x 3.