Funny CW moments page 86

[Dr. Bork Bork]

Had another one today.

Just called my mom to tell her she can't have Coke at my house anymore when she visits. I like to wear "name brand" t-shirts. I'm wearing a coke-a-cola shirt. The toddler comes over & touches the words "Mommy, Soooooda!"
AHAHAHA!
NOT OKAY, lol

[gojirama]

My boss has been having digestive issues. I told her I had made a lot of dietary changes, like eliminating grains and dairy, and would be happy to talk id she wanted. Two weeks ago she told me she's spent $750 out of pocket on a naturpath who told her she needed to eliminate wheat and dairy. I felt like sending her a bill. TODAY however, she came in and ate goldfish crackers and two pouches of those horrid Tree Top fruit snacks ( yes, that's what the kids are served in our church nursery. I have been trying to get that changed all of the 13 years I have worked here with very little and short lived success). I wanted to smack my head into a wall.

[Saoirse]

while eating a hard-boiled egg and avoiding the yolk, my son gleefully informed me that the white of the egg is the healthy part. apparently this was a PSA courtesy of my aunt. ugh...

though, this is the same kid who watched a commercial for "heart-healthy" oatmeal and said "what?!? that's not healthy! they should eat sausage for breakfast." so i guess i'm getting through to him.

[Mammoth toppler]

The other day, I made 'fudge' by melting down and mixing unsweetened 100% cocoa (the baking bar type) and coconut milk, with an ample amount of cinnamon, almonds, and coconut flakes - completely unsweetened. I took the container to work (about a pint or so in all) and proceeded lopping it down by the spoonful while first one boss, then another, came by to stare, then several curious coworkers gathered round asking 'are you eating... that whole container of pure fat?'.

On another day, same thing happened - when for lunch I downed two whole avocados plain (just peeled them and ate them like hard-boiled eggs) with a side of a six-inch salami, plain..

But the best was when I brought my six whole egg yolks to work, and poured them all over my huge green salad with chunks of beef and grilled venison as a dressing, and poured myself a half-cup of heavy cream for 'dessert' in the staff kitchen. I swear my coworkers (happily scarfing muffins and lean cuisine) practically fell over, one had to hold onto the counter saying they were having a heart attack just looking at my nosh!

I guess it's especially a shocker seeing as I'm a 5'3, 50-kilo female

And then just remembering some of the discussions that surface... such as my marathon-running overweight coworker telling me how it's bad for you to give up flour, and unless you have Celiac's it's absolutely necessary to eat grains to be healthy. And my other coworker - also overweight, vegetarian, living off (as far as I've seen for the past six months) purely simple carbs, tells me that your body 'needs carbs for energy' or else you'll die. And then the third coworker, who is obese and been trying to lose weight for a year or two (without any visible changes), trying to convince me that if I just switch over to eating like her, it will do my health 'wonders' - ie. a smidgeon of low-fat processed tuna-esque spread between two squares of whole-grain bread, followed an hour later by a bagel with low fat blueberry cream cheese, apple juice, and homemade cupcakes...

Headpalmheadpalmheadpalm repeatedly
And don't even get me started on my DH

[Polecatz]

The other day, I made 'fudge' by melting down and mixing unsweetened 100% cocoa (the baking bar type) and coconut milk, with an ample amount of cinnamon, almonds, and coconut flakes - completely unsweetened. I took the container to work (about a pint or so in all) and proceeded lopping it down by the spoonful while first one boss, then another, came by to stare, then several curious coworkers gathered round asking 'are you eating... that whole container of pure fat?'.

On another day, same thing happened - when for lunch I downed two whole avocados plain (just peeled them and ate them like hard-boiled eggs) with a side of a six-inch salami, plain..

But the best was when I brought my six whole egg yolks to work, and poured them all over my huge green salad with chunks of beef and grilled venison as a dressing, and poured myself a half-cup of heavy cream for 'dessert' in the staff kitchen. I swear my coworkers (happily scarfing muffins and lean cuisine) practically fell over, one had to hold onto the counter saying they were having a heart attack just looking at my nosh!

I guess it's especially a shocker seeing as I'm a 5'3, 50-kilo female

And then just remembering some of the discussions that surface... such as my marathon-running overweight coworker telling me how it's bad for you to give up flour, and unless you have Celiac's it's absolutely necessary to eat grains to be healthy. And my other coworker - also overweight, vegetarian, living off (as far as I've seen for the past six months) purely simple carbs, tells me that your body 'needs carbs for energy' or else you'll die. And then the third coworker, who is obese and been trying to lose weight for a year or two (without any visible changes), trying to convince me that if I just switch over to eating like her, it will do my health 'wonders' - ie. a smidgeon of low-fat processed tuna-esque spread between two squares of whole-grain bread, followed an hour later by a bagel with low fat blueberry cream cheese, apple juice, and homemade cupcakes...

Headpalmheadpalmheadpalm repeatedly
And don't even get me started on my DH

LOL its so frustrating isn't it yet I think, like me, you kind of enjoy upsetting the apple cart a bit . Its fun!! I am being told all the time that I should not go so long without food, that its harmful, carbs are essential blah de blah and that if I am not hungry after the gym - which I am sometimes not -then I am obviously not working hard enough :/. Yeah okay... But I'm not hungry so why should I eat?! I eat my brekkie and am not normally hungry till 1pm, even when I start work at 7am. Everyone around me seems to be constantly eating - I mean CONSTANTLY and permanently looking for the next bit of food - but never satisfied and now they are trying to fatten me up as well, or it feels like that!! Its like, I don't have time to be having to think about food every two hours.

[sarah1990]

I got a bit distracted by the idea of primal fudge...


But honestly I don't understand how people who are clearly overweight and unhealthy think they can dole out advice!

[naiadknight]

"I don't know how she does it! She'll work through 14, 18 hr days in the field on only 2 small meals and then wolf down a huge plate o' dinner. The only reason she eats breakfast and lunch is because I 'stop work' [meaning no work can be done until the problem has been resolved] and we leave for food. She doesn't even eat grains either! I have NO clue where her energy comes from."
-coworker, on the phone with his girlfriend, talking about working with me.

[spakesneaker]

@naiadknight, that's hilarious, lol.

I don't understand how skinny people think they can dole out advice to overweight people on how to lose weight when they've never actually been fat and had to lose weight.

I get the feeling that a lot of the 'CW moments' mentioned on the past few pages wouldn't have happened if people weren't actively bringing up their diets to their co-workers. It's great to want to spread the message and all, but it can make people defensive and that's why they say stupid shit.

Anyway, here's my CW moment: I was talking on the phone with my mother yesterday and she said that she was finishing up a walk and was going to Subway afterward. I said that's not very healthy (I've been talking to my mother for a long time about stopping eating wheat), and she clarified that it was for her sister, who was visiting, who became vegetarian last year and only eats grains, lentils, and vegetables. Not much weight lost, but she did develop a bunch of health problems. *sigh*

[Goldsmith]

On Saturday I was eating at a restaurant with friends, a burger and bar food type place. I was pretty excited to see they had a "Burger without a bun" plate, it came with mashed potatoes and a vegetable. I politely asked if I could substitute the potatoes for another vegetable.

My choices... Corn, Black-eyed Peas, Beans

[BreeKN]

Was hanging out by the pool yesterday (getting some Vitamin D) with a friend who has been trying to lose weight for most of her life...she asked me about Primal living and then proceeded to say--"So, how is that different from Atkins and Atkins isn't healthy? That diet (meaning Primal) just can't work for everyone." I was like, "I just explained how it is different". DUHHHH! And YES, it can work for everyone!" Puh-leeez. Ugh.