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Thread: Funny CW moments page 550

  1. #5491
    Clymb's Avatar
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    Saw this today...you know you're in America when:

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  2. #5492
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Anthony View Post
    I'm just gonna start tearing my shirt off in public when stuff like this comes up and be all "LOOK WHAT BACON DOES TO YOU!"
    Even better, yell it with an angry voice and act outraged at your 6-pack.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  3. #5493
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    Quote Originally Posted by namelesswonder View Post
    Even better, yell it with an angry voice and act outraged at your 6-pack.
    Nah, It'd be better to rip it off and yell "Are you not entertained!?" Gladiator style.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  4. #5494
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    Quote Originally Posted by KV8R View Post
    I haven't lifted my shirt yet, but I've been tempted lately, many times, with all the C/W people at work giving me their dietary advice, while their bellies hang over their belts.
    The problem is, if you're slim they'll say you can eat that way because you're lucky (or have good genes, are young, etc.). If you're fat, they won't believe you even if you've lost 100 pounds already or have overcome a serious health condition. No win.
    “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

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  5. #5495
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    Quote Originally Posted by naiadknight View Post
    Nah, It'd be better to rip it off and yell "Are you not entertained!?" Gladiator style.
    Effective if you're a man or a woman, although perhaps for different reasons.
    “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

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  6. #5496
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    Quote Originally Posted by Owly View Post
    The problem is, if you're slim they'll say you can eat that way because you're lucky (or have good genes, are young, etc.). If you're fat, they won't believe you even if you've lost 100 pounds already or have overcome a serious health condition. No win.
    i fully intend to make a tshirt with my fat ass on it as soon as i get my flat stomach.... not even gonna wait for my six pack
    Optimum Health powered by Actualized Self-Knowledge.

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  7. #5497
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    Quote Originally Posted by quelsen View Post
    i fully intend to make a tshirt with my fat ass on it as soon as i get my flat stomach.... not even gonna wait for my six pack
    I'm being completely serious here: That would be awesome! Just a shirt with an old picture that said "BEFORE" on it. That would be an amazing conversation starter.

  8. #5498
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Anthony View Post
    I'm being completely serious here: That would be awesome! Just a shirt with an old picture that said "BEFORE" on it. That would be an amazing conversation starter.
    i am serious as well.

    have you seen my before pic... how could anyone argue that my way didnt work?
    Optimum Health powered by Actualized Self-Knowledge.

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  9. #5499
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    Quote Originally Posted by Owly View Post
    The problem is, if you're slim they'll say you can eat that way because you're lucky (or have good genes, are young, etc.). If you're fat, they won't believe you even if you've lost 100 pounds already or have overcome a serious health condition. No win.
    So true, man. If you're still fat even if you lost gazillion pounds everything that comes out of your mouth is shit. If you're thin, nobody listens to you either because you must have an uncontrolled reason for that - genes, youth, some kind of disease or disorder. Like those are your choices. You can't be healthy because of something that you're doing (because they do what they're being told, eat 6 meals a day full of whole grains with shit results). Health must be out of your hands, in their eyes.
    Sometimes I wish I wasn't a skinny guy, then I'll have some cool story how I lost all that weight, and BAMN I could rub it in non-believers' faces.
    Everything is bad for something - How do you feel today?

  10. #5500
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    I need to bitch.
    My mother has seen my results in controlling my hypothyroidism. She's seen my weight go back to where it should be, my energy skyrocket, and all that jazz. We have the same variety and she's been bugging me to help her do the same thing. My mom is a carb freak. I've told her that if she wants to do this, she'll need to quit all the grain stuff and pick up more veggies. She agreed to it. I drew her up a 3 week meal plan that worked with my father's low fat diabetic BS, to an extent (he won't hear me on primal, so I leave him alone,) said follow this and DON'T EAT GRAINS!
    She called me several times that first week, asking if she could have biscuits/ syrup/ peanut butter/ whatever. I gave her the answer. The calls stopped during the second week. I figured she'd given up and gone back to her grains. 6 months later, I got a call.
    "Your plan isn't doing anything for me!"
    "What have you been eating?"
    "Toast for breakfast, [sugary low fat yogurt] and fruit for lunch, and whatever your dad fixes for dinner."
    "Including the noodles or rice or whatever?"
    "Well, yeah."
    "Mom, what did I say about low fat, bread, rice, and sugar?"
    Silence.
    "Mom?"
    "I put all that back in so I could eat like a normal person."
    "Then you'll look like a normal person and your thyroid will stay fucked up."
    "I was following your diet plan, though, I just added that back in."
    "And destroyed the entire idea behind it. Either follow it right or give it up and go back to whatever you were doing."
    [insert guilt trip from Mom]
    "Bye, Mom."
    *click*
    Last time I help her with her health, I swear.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

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