Funny CW moments page 498

[bloodorchid]

marshmallow fluff to replace butter?

...unholy abomination, zomgwtfbbq

[sakura_girl]

This afternoon all the people in the nearest vicinity was hovering around the m&m's and cupcakes in the cubicle next to mine. And complaining about how they couldn't resist. Sucks for them.

[UniqueTII]

I can't remember the last time I was tempted by anything other than real, delicious food.

[johnmjoy]

From the "You Can't Make This S**t Up" Department...

In the paper this morning came word that the Board of Education in one of the area towns was changing its "birthday snacks" policy. Cupcakes and cookies were already apparently a no-no, but, in order to ensure "healthier" and allergen-free snacks, they would now be restricted to items to be purchased (!) from the school's cafeteria. What are these items, you ask?

Cool Daze low fat birthday cake ice cream cup, Cutie Pie apple fruit turnover and Kellogg’s Pop-Tarts low fat frosted strawberry.

Go ahead - I dare you to Google these for ingredients lists.

Effin' gubmit schools.

[magnolia1973]

Well, hey have some pizza and a strawberry poptart and you have your fruit and veggies for the day.

[magnolia1973]

My husbands friend was over. He has a ginormous gut. He was grossed out by me eating a chicken leg skin and all. I offered him a leg and was declined citing watching his weight. He then proceeded to eat an entire bag of low fat pita chips I bought for my husband to eat with hummus. Then he ate a portion of shrimp stir fry and rice I had prepared for my husband... then went looking for sweets (none).

But you know, it was all low fat so not contributing to the gut and all that had to have had far fewer calories than my unhealthy chicken leg and grilled squash with spinach.

[Twibble]

I took my best friend out for breakfast for her birthday and she chose Cracker Barrel. She ordered her favorite blueberry pancakes and I chose their advertised Low Carb Breakfast of eggs, sausage, bacon and ham. So far, so good. Breakfasts brought out and toast was added to mine. I'll have to admit that it just stunned me for a second. I asked the waitress to remove the toast and she was just as surprised. "Would you like biscuits instead?" Well, no.

I ordered it once and told the waitress I didn't want the wheat toast because I can't have wheat. The next words out of her mouth were, "Do you want white bread instead?"

[pfair143]

The main reason I was so surprised was that the breakfast was given a 3 net carb total in very large print. How they figured the carbs from bread in that total I can't fathom. The waitress also asked if I would like cheese in my eggs. "Is it REAL cheese?" "Yes; it comes in those little flat squares and they mix it in". Uhm, no.

[Jaradel]

The main reason I was so surprised was that the breakfast was given a 3 net carb total in very large print. How they figured the carbs from bread in that total I can't fathom. The waitress also asked if I would like cheese in my eggs. "Is it REAL cheese?" "Yes; it comes in those little flat squares and they mix it in". Uhm, no.

IIRC, "net carbs" is total grams of carbs minus grams of fiber (since fiber is good for you, according to CW). At least that's what they did back in my Atkins days. I'm glad I know better now...

[doghug]

This is from Better Homes and Gardens.

I"m never going to buy a Better homes and gardens magazine ever again now that I know that It's CW
yuk.