Funny CW moments page 422

[Sudenveri]

Look a few links down!
Mother¿s fury as sporty girl, four, who weighs just 3st 7lb is branded ¿clinically obese¿ by NHS | Mail Online

This happened to by father recently too. Mid-sixties, active, rides his bike, goes to the gym, ran the Humber half-marathon recently. His doctor labelled him "obese" too, instead of, say, being truthful and describing him as slightly overweight. The only explanation is some sort of payoff in it for the doctors. Diagnose X many people as obese, get up league table Y, archive government treatment target Z and collect ₤200.

It's the Daily Mail...I'm an American and even I know how terrible it is.

[billp]

It's the Daily Mail...I'm an American and even I know how terrible it is.

I don't read it very often as it makes me irritable. It does have things that I agree with sometimes, but it is mixed up with things that I find incomprehensible. For instance, they have a total disregard for civil liberties, whatever the consequences. Today there is something from Melenie Phillips arguing that the civil rights of viewer of Internet pornography are less important that "protecting children" (i.e. stopping 14 yr old boys from looking at mucky pictures). Except that anyone who's not a flaming idiot knows it is impossible to stop 14 yr old boys looking at porn (and don't call them children, real children are not interested, 14 is virtually manhood), while the only way to go about such a ridiculous ban would be to institute a massive Chinese-style system of state control, which apart from being very harmful, would kill the Internet industry stone dead, as well as inevitably criminalising people like me who can set up a web proxy in two minutes flat - not due to watching lots of now-illegal porn but simply because such a system cannot be effective without criminalising the tools of getting round it.

[Milty]

Remembering a conversation snippet from about a year ago, more or less went as follows:

{Almost} Step-Son: I'm hungry.
My Dad: Maybe your Dad (me) will take you home for a sandwich.
{Almost} Step-Son: No, they don't buy bread anymore and I hate it.
My Dad: You want to be careful not having bread anymore, the manufacturers put all sorts of nutrients in it now to help kids with fighting colds and things to help their immune systems.
Me: Not really, bread actually causes an inflammatory response and would slow their immune systems and actually work to hinder them from getting better.
My Dad: {puzzled, but accepting look}

[Trifith]

A CW moment from The Onion

OXFORD, ENGLAND—A new report in the Journal Of The Anthropological Society Of Oxford reveals that human feet were likely once used as a means of extravehicular locomotion. "Apparently, as recently as 20 years ago, the foot was used in a process called 'walking,' by which the human body actually propelled itself," the report read. "Starting sometime in the late 1970s, these crude early feet gradually evolved into their present function of operating the gas and brake pedals on automobiles." The same team of researchers discovered in 1994 that the human brain was once used for various problem-solving applications before evolving into an absorption/storage unit for lyrics to TV-show theme songs

[Dracil]

From another forum:

So I do love oatmeal/malt o meal etc....but man...I cant seem to get that oatmeal to taste decent w/out adding a lil' brown sugar (which I can, but am trying not to).

This is what I do: 1/2 c oats, 2 tbls skim evaporated milk, cinnamon, 2 stevia packets: it's okay..but not great.

My friend adds raisins..but although I love raisins, I don't like them cooked.

ANY OTHER GREAT IDEAS OUT THERE???

Sincerely,
Grossed out by her oats.

I just told her that if she can't stomach oats by itself, then maybe she doesn't actually love it. What she loves is all the sugar and junk she puts on it and maybe she should go find something else she actually enjoys that's healthy. Of course, my response is just drowned out by people giving their favorite method of eating oat-flavored dessert for breakfast.

[Corvidae]

From another forum:



I just told her that if she can't stomach oats by itself, then maybe she doesn't actually love it. What she loves is all the sugar and junk she puts on it and maybe she should go find something else she actually enjoys that's healthy. Of course, my response is just drowned out by people giving their favorite method of eating oat-flavored dessert for breakfast.

Honestly, she could try steel-cut oats. I used to eat steel-cut oats plain, or--even better--as part of a savory breakfast dish with sausage and veggies.

Rolled oats (which is what most "instant oats" are) are just the progenitors of starchy, flavorless paste.

[Spubba]

Honestly, she could try steel-cut oats. I used to eat steel-cut oats plain, or--even better--as part of a savory breakfast dish with sausage and veggies.

Rolled oats (which is what most "instant oats" are) are just the progenitors of starchy, flavorless paste.

Back in my old days I'd eat an entire bowl of steel-cut oats, plain, no flavoring. I liked the taste. Rolled oats are cruel and unusual. Instant oats - that is one food that I can honestly say, I'd rather starve than eat it. Gross.

[Milty]

Back in my old days I'd eat an entire bowl of steel-cut oats, plain, no flavoring. I liked the taste. Rolled oats are cruel and unusual. Instant oats - that is one food that I can honestly say, I'd rather starve than eat it. Gross.

That just means it's good for you

[justyouraveragecavemen]

That just means it's good for you

+1 No pain, no gain is what I say.

[DuhPrincess]

+1 No pain, no gain is what I say.

My motto is: No pain, no pain.