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Thread: Funny CW moments page 344

  1. #3431
    drssgchic's Avatar
    drssgchic is offline Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    I heard a story once about a Native American during the time that they were being given the choice between converting and death. As he was tied to the stake for burning he asked- "If I convert I'll go to Heaven when I die?"
    "Yes"
    "Heaven is where the Christians go?"
    "Yes"
    "Kill me now."
    I identify with this man.
    http://cattaillady.com/ My blog exploring the beginning stages of learning how to homestead. With the occasional rant.

    Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

    And now I have an Etsy store: CattailsandCalendula

  2. #3432
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    only the mormons get into heaven, dont you guys watch South Park?

  3. #3433
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    Quote Originally Posted by naiadknight View Post
    I'm a heathen, so I'll miss whatever rapture is in fashion this year, too. Unless it's the Rapture for heathen agnostibuddhipagans that were once baptized Lutheran and christened Episcopalian, in which case, I'm all set. The way I figure, I'd rather wear jeans and party in Hell than wear a dress and rub elbows with the born again in Heaven.
    Hell is where all the great BBQ is and its warm enough to wear tanktops all the time. Im in.
    "Since going primal, I've found that there are very few problems that cannot be solved with butter and/or bacon fat."

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  4. #3434
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    Quote Originally Posted by naiadknight View Post
    I'm a heathen, so I'll miss whatever rapture is in fashion this year, too. Unless it's the Rapture for heathen agnostibuddhipagans that were once baptized Lutheran and christened Episcopalian, in which case, I'm all set. The way I figure, I'd rather wear jeans and party in Hell than wear a dress and rub elbows with the born again in Heaven.

    Naiad - I'll meet you at that party (says the paganwiccandeist who was baptised and raised Catholic including all girls Catholic school... )
    Quote Originally Posted by L8F View Post
    ... I drank the fermented koolaid, and am totally on board...

    I'm alergic to carbs - they make me break out in fat!



  5. #3435
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    Quote Originally Posted by JennaRose View Post
    only the mormons get into heaven, dont you guys watch South Park?
    +1 I love South Park
    Quote Originally Posted by L8F View Post
    ... I drank the fermented koolaid, and am totally on board...

    I'm alergic to carbs - they make me break out in fat!



  6. #3436
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    Quote Originally Posted by canio6 View Post
    And turned water into wine but trying showing up at the local Southern Baptist Church with a bottle or two. I still remember listening to a Sunday school teacher explaining it was non-alcoholic wine. LMAO.
    I used to sing at the Saturday night service, and they had communion every week. Unfortunately, wine gives me a 3-day migraine (sulfites) and that's what they use. They also use an actual loaf of bread instead of wafers, so I'm totally screwed.

    Gluten and sulfites - it's what dark, quiet rooms are made for!

    So... I passed.
    My sorely neglected blog - http://ThatWriterBroad.com

  7. #3437
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    I'm descended from Odin on my father's side and Lugh on my mother's. Whatever I believe the bible says I'm destined for hell.
    In all of the universe there is only one person with your exact charateristics. Just like there is only one person with everybody else's characteristics. Effectively, your uniqueness makes you pretty average.

  8. #3438
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    " agnostibuddhipagans" Could you please direct me to a congregation? I am a spiritual person with no spiritual path.

  9. #3439
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    LJH
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    Quote Originally Posted by Finnegans Wake View Post
    It would be great if such a thing actually occurred. The Rapture types are, well, effin' annoying nuts, so bye bye, we'll miss ya. So, a little spring cleaning, that's cool. Plus then you'd have the unintended benefits of lower unemployment, empty houses for the homeless, less stinking traffic, and of course more bacon for the rest of us.
    Unless all the pigs get raptured too, then we're screwed.

  10. #3440
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    Quote Originally Posted by LJH View Post
    Unless all the pigs get raptured too, then we're screwed.
    no, doesn't the bible say that pigs are filthy animals? destined for hellfire


    .....i would hella eat hellfire-crisped bacon

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