I kinda forget Want
As in, lately I literally lack the ability to choose things for myself or make decisions, if that decision is based only on my preference or desire (and not limited by budget concerns, availability, etc).
I'm sittin here with this amazon gift card my wife got me for christmas, and I don't even know where to begin. It's been like 2 weeks of half-hearted second-thought browsing around, and I haven't even had an idea about stuff that I want.
Does anyone else have a similar limitation now that they are conditioned by domesticity and monogamy to first and most intensely consider another and their wants before their own? I can't tell if it's cool or gay to go through lol
"Ah, those endless forests, and their horror-haunted gloom! For what eternities have I wandered through them, a timid, hunted creature, starting at the least sound, frightened of my own shadow, keyed-up, ever alert and vigilant, ready on the instant to dash away in mad flight for my life. For I was the prey of all manner of fierce life that dwelt in the forest, and it was in ecstasies of fear that I fled before the hunting monsters."
Jack london, "Before Adam"