I dated my high school sweetheart for 5 years, then we married right after college. Then he started his first job and became a workaholic overnight. I struggled with depression for many years, tried to do everything I thought I was "supposed" to do, including passing up an opportunity to earn a PhD because I knew I would be staying home with young children at some point. Three kids and seventeen years later, he still did not make an effort to participate in "our" life, not even to help make decisions about finances, goals, etc. When the kids went to school full days, I found a hobby, and then I found another man who could be a real companion. I did not even know I was vulnerable.