Primal Journal: NZ Suse page 152

[Suse]

I feel like i am getting nothing done at the moment but meh, who cares. I did have a super big walk on the beach with the doggies this morning, and then I took them over to the rest home to see mum. I'm turning them into therapy dogs, lots of the oldies love them and want to pat them and chat. Nice. Had starr up on mum's lap and leo just lay on the floor and whinged for an hour.

Went home for some lunch - as promised I had my steak and salad for lunch, washed down with a coke and then a handful of chocolates? hmmmm oh well. Bit of time out on the deck in my bikini which was nice. Then back to pick up mum and take her to the hairdresser. While she was there, I took all the dogs (including mums) for a short walk round the block. Judy, Mum's dog, is old and deaf and blind and probably as demented as mum So a slow walk. Then picked up mum and took her back to the rest home in time for her dinner. The staff at the rest home are lovely.

Apparently my dumbarse brother rang the rest home today complaining about me moving the table by the door in mums room, he's concerned she'll go outside into the garden and have a fall. I have no idea what planet he is on as I have moved nothing... if he is going to make stupid accusations, at least get them right. At least I dont have to speak to him. If I do need to communicate with him, I just leave him a note. I know, so grown up, but really,, if you met him, you would understand.

Tonight I had a lazy fish and chips for dinner washed down with a beer and then a glass of wine and watched The Graham Norton Show,, he always makes me laugh.

And that is my day....

Tomorrow I am meeting an old school friend for brunch. Havent seen her for 35 years or so....

[Suse]

yay I'm back home again. but ugh, I have a splitting headache which is wine induced.... was over at the neighbours telling her the whole sorry saga re mum and the dumbos. Clearly it wasnt my new favourite low alcohol wine. Must get some more of that, (although at the moment I dont feel like having wine ever again - no doubt that will change by 5pm )

I need to try and get into some good habits this year, proper and regular exercise would be a good thing. I need to capitalise on the stress induced weight loss and get this flabby tummy into shape. Planks obviously would be a good start.

I am going to treat myself to a half day spa treatment later this week I think. facial, massage, etc. I think I can say in all honesty that I deserve it. the place I like to go to has a lovely pool, gym, steam room, sauna so I can get there early and have a steam to really get out all the toxins in my body.

I have a few jobs on my list for today, but one thing i must do is wash and vacuuum my car. It is filthy and I cant stand it a minute longer. One more week of unemployment so I had better get my act together and start clearing jobs off the list - especially now that I am back home.

[Suse]

well I had my spa treatment and it was heavenly. I love that feeling as you drift in and out of consciousness when having the treatment. I came away feeling like a million bucks.

I also cleaned my car so good that the jobs are getting done. I need to do it again tomorrow as I did a drive to Tauranga today to see Mum so needless to say it is covered in dead bugs Mum was very down in the dumps when I arrived, but I took her back to her room and gave her a hand massage and suggested she have a nap which she did while I sat there and read a magazine. After she had some lunch she had perked up considerably so I took her out for coffee and cake Nice, it made me feel good to come home knowing she was in a happier frame of mind. Good days, bad days I guess.

Its the middle of the night and I'm listening to the fireman snoring in the next room... My god it is bad tonight. Not long now till his operation so hopefully this will be a thing of the past.

Last day of freedom tomorrow and then work. i think I should make it an alcohol free day.

[Siobhan]

Hi Suse, I have only recently discovered your journal and have been reading it so I thought I would stop in and say hello. I really admire how you are handling your mum and your family situation.

I used to travel to NZ regularly when I was a flight attendant. I loved it there and it is the one place I really, really miss. In fact thinking about it just now makes me a little 'homesick' although obviously it was not my home.

[NZ primal Gwamma]

Suze - thinking of you, enjoy this last day of relaxation !!!!!
G x

[Greensprout]

Hey Suse, good to hear you're hanging in there, despite the family crap.

How goes the job hunting?

[Suse]

Hi Suse, I have only recently discovered your journal and have been reading it so I thought I would stop in and say hello. I really admire how you are handling your mum and your family situation.

I used to travel to NZ regularly when I was a flight attendant. I loved it there and it is the one place I really, really miss. In fact thinking about it just now makes me a little 'homesick' although obviously it was not my home.

thanks siobhan for stopping in. ahh yes little ol' nz is a great place. You're welcome back any time

[Suse]

lthanks gwamma and greenspout.

I'm actually going back to my old job, they contacted me and asked me to return and I felt ok about it. I'm cutting down to a 9 day fortnight which will be nice.... and also that extra day will enable me to do stuff as well as do the occasional day trip to see mum.

Bit of a lazy day today, but have done a few jobs. Had a pizza for lunch (alas not gluten free base). We did it in our new hooded bbq, (we bought a pizza stone to put in it) and that worked out well. Cleared out some cupboards.

I was goinng to be alcohol free but thought I'd have a glass of wine with my dinner. My next door neighbours have the screamiest children ever and seriously they just drive me to drink.

[Suse]

boyo, what a day. Had the worst headache for most of the day, just a general tension headache. Then it got worse after a phone call from the rest home about mum. It looks like she will need to be reassessed and possibly go into a secure dementia unit. I've been feeling awful about it all day but put on my work face, but once I got onthe bus to come home, I just felt like crying... and so I did, and actually that's pretty much what I've been doing since I got home.

At work, it is just stress and drama, lots of errors that are going to need to be fixed. But everyone is thrilled and delighted to see me back so you couldnt ask for more really on that front. I'm not sure when my 9 day fortnight will actually start, frankly I can see me doing 10hour 10 days a fortnight for quite some time....

eating front.... bad, bad, bad. Dont ask. Not a lot of sugar today though, which now that I think about it probably explains the headache earlier in the day. Tonights is probably from crying.

[Greensprout]

{{hugs to you, Suse}}

Rough about mum, but she's best to be in the place that can provide the level of care she needs. Nothing wrong with a good cry, sounds like it was a necessary thing.

I was going to say hooray about being able to return to your job, but maybe not so much with all the drama. Sigh. Maybe the lotto will come through for you.

Hope tomorrow is a bit better.