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Thread: Still on the Warpath: Naiadknight's Battle Tome page 188

  1. #1871
    namelesswonder's Avatar
    namelesswonder is offline Senior Member
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    I am irate on your behalf, though I know you are too. You are an awesome engineer and I don't need to know diddly about what you do to know that. It's obvious from the way you talk about your work. You got this, lady.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  2. #1872
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    I've been bouncing wildly from irate to depressed to cold logic. I now have someone else on my dark alley list.
    I was given two weeks severance and get paid tomorrow, so I have 2- 2.5 months (including this month) of bills, plus another couple of months in savings, before I hafta touch the joint reserve. That also doesn't include unemployment benefits, which could potentially stretch it another 6-10 months.
    I also have an in with Sister City, and a good chance with City and TxDOT. I'm hoping for Sister City, but I'll take what I can get. I'm hoping I can get a public sector job again. I'm tired of private. I'm REALLY hoping to get one before the month is up. If I can land it in two weeks, I can sock away a full paycheck untouched.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  3. #1873
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    geostump is offline Senior Member
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    You have a plan and sound determined as hell.
    Georgette

  4. #1874
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    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    Day 1 unemployed (again.)
    I did some hard soul searching yesterday after talking with Mentor. The common denominator in all my job loss is me. When something happens that many times to one person, the person isn't taking a clue. Mentor reminded me. When I turned it on her, as I worked for her at one point, what she thought it might be, it made her uncomfortable. I got the answers I needed, but not the ones I wanted. She delivered the blows fairly softly, but they still stung.
    My work is not the best. Neither is my work ethic. If I can find an easier, quicker way to do it, I will. I rush through my work and make mistakes that I wouldn't if I planned out the process and slowed the hell down. I also have a tendency to slack and procrastinate if I think I can get away with it. That goes to fear of being wrong and fear of fucking it up. If I don't start or finish it, I can't fuck it up, is the way my animal thought process tends to go. I need to put down that rock. I will no longer be abused if I fuck it up. If I don't rush and I put my full energy into it, I won't fuck it up. I can't explain why I race to finish things. I'm sure it has to do with a rock I was handed in childhood, I just can't pinpoint what it was.
    My personality also comes off as abrasive and brash to many. One of those pride goeth before fall personalities that just rubs people the wrong way. That traces back to fear as well, fear of being hurt. You can't hurt me if I'm too cocky and proud to be hurt. The sarcasm and sharp tongue, while genetic, were honed by fear. If I can take you down or off your guard, or deflect you with sarcasm, you can't hurt me. If I hurt you before you can hurt me, I win. It was/ is a defense mechanism, one that could stand to be lowered. Not removed, but possibly rebuilt into a shield or breastplate as opposed to a sword.
    It's also quite possible I just went into the wrong career. Most career aptitude tests indicate that I should be in a creative profession. Tech writer, interior decorator, graphic design, that sort of thing. The way Mentor phrased it, "[I am] much more creative and out there than most engineers, perhaps too much so for [me] to stay an engineer." I've thought many times about setting up on Etsy with paintings, maybe sculptures if I could find a kiln or the right place to get wood. I don't consider myself good enough to freelance, but selling my art, I'm comfortable with. If I were in a larger city, I'd apply as a personal shopper (that'd be so much fun!) I've thought about my own fashion line, but that's a really hard business to get into. I would also have a blast as an experimental scientist, not that I'll find that out here. I thought about teaching. If I'm not creating I'm happiest and most fulfilled when I can help people one on one, and solve their problems. I've contemplated tutoring. I enjoy doing it, and once I have a customer base, I could make enough for it to be viable.
    Now to call the various leads on engineering.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  5. #1875
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    Sabine is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by naiadknight View Post
    ...Now unemployed ...

  6. #1876
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    Sister City position is currently closed. Hoping the offer they gave to the other guy isn't enough and the person turns it down.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  7. #1877
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    theprimalcajun is offline Senior Member
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    Wow...that was quite some soul searching! I guess the best thing to do is go with your "gut" feeling...& your heart. Just curious...why did you choose engineering?
    Goal: Don't worry be happy!

  8. #1878
    naiadknight's Avatar
    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    I originally chose civil engineering as a path to wind engineering. Wind engineering was meant to be a sidestep from meteorology, my original viable career love. Once I got into CE, I discovered hydraulics and hydrology (water) and decided against getting my wind engr masters due to burn out and lack of funds.
    I think I'm done with engineering. I'll still apply for engr jobs, because that's the exp I have, but I'm expanding my options. I need something more creative that helps people, not corporations.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  9. #1879
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    theprimalcajun is offline Senior Member
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    Wowee! You are one smart cookie!! 😀 I'm sure you'll do wonderful in whatever you pursue!! I wish you the best of luck!
    Goal: Don't worry be happy!

  10. #1880
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    canio6 Guest
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    I'm very sorry to hear that Queen High Bitch made you a casualty That sucks.

    Expanding options is good. You're smart as f*ck so someone should realize that here shortly and throw money at you.

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