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Thread: Still on the Warpath: Naiadknight's Battle Tome page 186

  1. #1851
    theprimalcajun's Avatar
    theprimalcajun is offline Senior Member
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    Naiad...very thoughtful post. With me being much older than you I am glad to see a young'un with good sense!! Maybe there's hope for the country in your generation. We'll see. I totally relate to where you are coming from...I posted somewhere else & won't repeat the whole thing again...but hubby was brought up with a food nazi...they could afford to have extra, but his mom felt it was more important to buy fabric & stuff, for her generally. She was a health fanatic before it was cool. So now he wants snacks around all the time. I'm a pretty good cook (she wasn't) so he gets good suppers & full blown breakfasts on the weekends. But something about being denied/deprived as a kid makes for serious issues as an adult. And of course not just in food issues but other things as well.

    Unfortunately most people don't understand what folks went thru during the depression. We are on the verge of another one if we aren't already there. If you don't know how to do without or make do its gonna be tough for a lot of folks.

    You & nameless (& others I know) give me some hope for the younger generation. Your parents should be proud of the young woman you are. And I mean that...not just blowing smoke up your skirt.

    Have a wonderful day!
    Goal: Don't worry be happy!

  2. #1852
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    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    Thanks, PC. That actually means a lot to me.
    I actually find it funny and depressing at the same time when people buy a house that forces them to scrimp and pinch for the mortgage. I'm talking knowing before you sign the paperwork that money would be tight. I can't understand why you'd do that. We intentionally bought a house where we could make all the bills on one income, just in case. The real estate agent hastened to point out we could afford twice as much according to the approved loan, and we shut her down. We still have more on the mortgage than we wanted, but we can still squeak by on one income plus unemployment.
    Looking at so many of my generation, I'm worried we'll get into another Depression and people will starve just so they can keep consuming. People like NW and my youngest sister give me some hope, but I think too many have been too comfortable and forgotten what history teaches.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  3. #1853
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    NK, you're not the only ones who go by "Depression" rules! When I was a young child I think money wasn't an issue, but original father ("Dad" is my stepdad) was alcoholic so by the time I was 8 or so, most of the money went down his throat in the form of booze. When Mom kicked him out, he was supposed to pay child support, but this was back in the dark ages when they didn't enforce court ordered child support. So for most of my memory when I understood cash flow, we were dirt poor. We never qualified for any assistance because of original father's income, nevermind that Mom never got any of it for raising us 3 kids. I never got an allowance, and any money I made babysitting/working part time went to Mom.

    So fast forward to being an adult and making my own money. Sweetie also grew up in a family with tight finances. He and I pay cash for everything except the mortgage. Our only bills are the ones you can't escape: power, garbage, water, food. And of course the mortgage payment. Hubby drives a 2006 Subaru, paid cash for it new. I have a 2007 Subaru, paid cash for it new. I bought Sweetie a Ducati motorcycle in 2006, paid cash for it new. We never had a lot of "extra" income over the years, finances were tight when the kids were young, but we got by. Bought used everything so we could pay cash and not be in debt. That 2007 Subaru was the first new car I've had in my life, and I was 50 years old when I got it.

    My kids are all grown and on their own now, but they have the same frugality. The only debt any of them have (besides mortgages) is youngest daughter's hubby is in school and they got a student loan for it. (Sorry, I paid for my kid's college, won't pay for their spouse's college!)

    I don't know if it's necessarily growing up poor, but it certainly has to do with the values you learn as a child. When my kids were teens, we were doing well enough that they got allowances, but they had to do chores or no pay. Anything extra they wanted they had to earn the money themselves. And any infractions of the family rules (breaking curfew, etc.) included a $$ fine as well as an appropriate punishment for the "crime".

    I think the "I want it NOW even if I can't afford it" is a result of many influences. The easy availability of credit, the advertising, the internet (on Facebook, everyone posts the good stuff...), and an increasing lack of parenting. Many parents today give their kids what they want, go into debt to get their kids things they don't need, and heaven forbid that a child should ever be subjected to frustration!

    *gets off soap box*

    Can you tell you picked a topic near and dear to my heart?

  4. #1854
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    I hope we can get to that point re: mortgage and a house some day. Getting by on one income I guess is a pre-baby goal. I really need to get on my certification stuff [[picks up book to do some reading now]]. I think the most ridiculous thing about affording a mortgage/just getting by with things like that is the cost of living is so absurd in some areas. We're stuck where we are because of Hulky's school in the city, basically. This close to Boston is way too expensive in rent and the houses are absurd. We'll definitely move someday, but we have to be able to afford to do that first (even if a job would cover moving expenses).
    Journal on depression/anxiety
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  5. #1855
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    I'm scared that if we can't make significant contributions for hypothetical future children's education, they will be totally screwed over by the loan system the way it is now. I lucked out with not a lot of debt, compared to most of my classmates, about the cost of a standard new sedan with no discounts. I've heard so many horror stories about former classmates who are fighting with loan companies to get onto longer repayment plans, whereas I should be able to pay off in 7 more years.

    It's hard to decide between setting aside my meager savings for early loan repayment or just saving it up.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
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  6. #1856
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    Nameless, you might want to check out Dave Ramsey: Dave Ramsey Homepage

    He's got some great advice on personal finances, paying things off, etc.

  7. #1857
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    I guess the emergency fund is the first step.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  8. #1858
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    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    I know TX is talking about restandardizing tuition. There are also plans where you can lock in tuition at current rates for a future kid, so long as you pay so much into the plan each year in TX, so long as the kid goes to a state university. I'm hoping to do that for our kids and at least pay for some of it. Granted, that's assuming the kid chooses a decent major. I'm not paying for an underwater basket weaving degree.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  9. #1859
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    Quote Originally Posted by naiadknight View Post
    There are also plans where you can lock in tuition at current rates for a future kid, so long as you pay so much into the plan each year in TX, so long as the kid goes to a state university.
    Utah has the same program. The caveat is, your kids gotta go to state schools. This didn't work for us because, being military, we were stationed all over the place (last 7 years of Sweetie's career overseas). But we had saved for it, so it wasn't a problem. However, we told our kids that if they wanted to go to Bring Money Private University, they had to pay the amount over what state college tuition was. They took the cheap option!

  10. #1860
    namelesswonder's Avatar
    namelesswonder is online now Senior Member
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    I wish I'd understood more about money then! I'm glad I went to the school I did and met the people I did, but I could have had free college b/c of my state testing scores (or severely reduced, but I think my parents could have covered it). Ah well, my private university was a collection of misfits and it was a good time. Plus, I got excellent job experience!
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

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