Kymma, Kisses are my only sugar - Journal page 8

[ssn679doc]

I think I know what should be in the exercise section, but should wild bedroom antics or nude dancing in the street come first?

Since "nude" comes before "wild".... that might be a good place to start....

[Kymma]

I am writing this from the skies (plane). I have been on a biz trip since Tuesday. Eating while out of town went great, stayed completely on track. I did have some vodka and clubs, 4 on Tues night, 3 last night. Not too bad. We also walked quite a bit.

I felt like all the mirrors in my hotel room showed me how much my body is changing. Thinking I need a new mirror in my lady room or somewhere so I can watch and enjoy the healing and reducing mynweightnprocess. What a weird feeling after avoiding mirrors. I will be interested to weigh tomorrow.

Enjoyed the trip. I am not worrying about the job situation. I am excited about Christmas this year. I am normally a grinch. But I am going to borrow a friend's fake Charlie brown tree, make some snowflakes out of color paper and hang from the ceiling and really enjoy the season.

Mood is good, The last few weeks have been so great in reflecting on how far my health and mental state have come. I also know next year will be awesome. I love being hopeful.

Energy comes and goes. Some moments I feel amazing, alert, and then I feel achy and exhausted at times. So I am going to track my blood sugar next week, start strength exercises and my yoga DVD and start seeing if I can turn the energy around.

Sorry I can't add any spice to the book idea right now, I am somewhat tired and my brain doesn't feel playful.

[Kymma]

Well, I had a "binge." Which makes me laugh, because it was only a binge in terms of going over carbs and having a little sugar. I had 1/2 cup of cashews and 3 squares of Lindt 70% dark chocolate. I don't regret it. And I lost 0.6 while out of town. So a few carbs didn't harm me.

[demuralist]

Careful, that is how I usually go down the dark path...I didn't gain from those carbs. Mind you I don't think you should regret or feel guilty about the cashews or chocolate, but for me that has been the start of many a slippery slope.

[Kymma]

No, I won't be going down it! I am just glad I didn't pay for it. I am back on track, no more alcohol or cheats, even small ones, until Dec. 22 at my fave party of the year, where I will imbibe on vodka clubs, but not eat the snacks. This will be the first year where I refuse to hover the food table and be all fat kid with it.

[demuralist]

When we do these parties, I generally carry a little black beaded purse in one hand and my drink in the other (I am usually the designated driver so usually a diet soda) but that keeps my hands busy so no ability to slip food into my mouth! I don't even look at it, so no feelings of deprivation either.

Glad you jumped right back on track, I am sure you will have fun at the party.

[Kymma]

I must have eaten something that caused some inflammatory reaction, because I gained 3.2 pounds since yesterday. We ate out both meals we had, so you never really know. I had 6 shrimp and an omelet and italian spinach for breakfast and mixed fajitas with cheese dip for dinner. I am guessing that one of the spices used on the meat had some msg or something in it. The bloat always happens the day after you see the lowest number, bc yesterday I saw 230.6!!!! So in my mind, that is where I am.

Today, I am skipping breakfast, I just can't fathom eating right now, so I am not forcing it, but I am having a bulletproof coffee (YUM!). Drinking lots of water and having a salad for lunch and probably hot dogs or eggs for dinner. I have rehearsals most nights for the next couple of weeks. I need to think about what I can have for dinners that will work for short time to prepare. Most likely, it will be eggs or deli meats for now.

My mood is good, but my energy is still low. I am not sure what to make of that exactly. I think the answer is to figure out how to push through and start exercising. I may go walk on the treadmill and start doing a few body weight exercises to get started. We shall see how the rest of today goes. I am getting my usual December rush/push at work and need to keep my stress at a minimum.

[Kymma]

Back to 230.8 today! WOOT!

I haven't been eating much the last couple of days. I have had some slight nausea esp at night and in the mornings. Have you ever noticed that all symptoms seem to also be the symptoms of pregnancy? I am just waiting a few days, bc lo carb/keto can also be slight nausea.

What do I eat? A lot of boars head hot dogs, eggs, hard salami, bullet proof coffees, veggies, gouda cheese. I could probably stand to eat a few more veggies. I am looking forward to a Lenny's Sub Shop Chicken Philly salad for lunch.

I am happy and content. It's weird. I have lots going on in my head, but it isn't really getting to me. I am so glad for some mental calm.

[Sabine]

Judg mentioned a few days ago about a couple who had great success using stir-frys to get more vegetables into their diet. I don't feel I have a problem with veggie amounts, but I am always trying to get more into my Honey, so last night I made a stir-fry with 1/4 head cabbage, 2 carrots, 1/2 onion, 1 large zucchini, 2C bean sprouts. About 7 cups of vegetables. The girls ate a small amount, maybe 1 cup total between them, so I had about 2 1/2 cups of vegetables, and my Honey had 3 1/2! Painlessly.

So I will do that again.

[canio6]

Mental calm is great Keep it up