Having the Hardest Time page

[bellajgw]

I've been jumping on and falling off the Primal Bandwagon so many times that my butt is sore from landing flat. I have a lot of weight to lose and I have tons of horrible and uncomfortable symptoms I'm trying to get rid of, and you would think that with all the research, preparation, and reading I do to make this stick I would have found SOMETHING?!?!?!

It's become clear to me that I have, at least, an intolerance to wheat and gluten. When I haven't had it in a while and then have it suddenly, I get nauseous, I have digestive issues, my colon and I become bitter enemies. Sugar? Same thing. Raging sugar-beast. I can FEEL my blood sugar rising and falling and it's not pleasant. I'm also finding that I can't eat tomatoes or onions (what is life without them? I haven't figured out!). Oh, and dairy..I'm lactose intolerant, medically proven.

So why, after sticking with a very strict non-dairy, non-gluten/grain, non-onion/tomato, non-sugar diet for over 2 weeks did 1 night of debauchery turn, yet again, into 2 weeks of intestinal hell and weight gain?

I've done the research, I know the facts, I know about cravings and insulin. Hell, I have even read books and studies on will-power and how we have very little of it as humans and how to cope. I was doing great and now I can't seem to get my toes back into foot-holds and pull myself back on board!

As I sit here, today alone, I've already had 2 croissants, coffee with cream, and 6 pieces of leftover halloween candy that someone else brought in (though I did have a good salad for lunch). My stomach is miserable. I am filled with acid, gas, and exhausted! So, knowing how great I feel sticking with this, why is it that I didn't just jump back on board? I know I can't be perfect all the time, but I should be able to at least get back to it without weeks, or months, getting the better of me, right? I'm in my 30s for crying out loud! I'm not a child anymore. My mother was just diagnosed with diabetes...why can't I take what I know, what I've learned, and put it to good use?

Does anyone have anything that will help me? Advice? Tricks? I have over 100 pounds to lose and I'm NOT getting any younger here.

[Noctiluca]

Sounds to me like you KNOW you need to change and in fact know WHAT to change. So maybe you need a check in buddy or something. Someone you have to be accountable to EVERY day. Sometimes knowing that you will have to 'fess up face to face that you ate crud and feel like crap is enough to keep people from doing it in the first place. And maybe ask people around you to not offer or leave stuff you don't want to be eating (like the candy).

[Annieh]

Maybe you need to be kinder to yourself, Bella, and treat yourself more gently. Our entire environment seems designed to sabotage our best efforts at healthy eating and it sounds like you don't get much in the way of encouragement or good example.

In these circumstances it's entirely natural to succumb to candy and a croissant or two, in fact in my opinion you could have done much worse. Your health issues are genuinely unpleasant, and it's not surprising they make you feel miserable, what you don't need is to beat yourself up over it as well.

I am not suggesting you make excuses for yourself, but just that you exercise patience as you would if you were trying to teach a child some new skill that is hard to learn and only comes through much practice including many mistakes (speaking as a piano teacher here). After all, you are trying to learn a whole new approach to eating, there is much to learn as well as a lot of habits to unlearn and it is bound to take time. It's not easy but it will be worth it.

Also, there are lots of wonderfully delicious primal foods - bacon, pork crackling, cream, even chocolate. Nuts. Fancy cheese. Yummy cheesecakes etc etc. If you were able to focus on some of the things you are allowed to have and make sure they are available to you, maybe it will be easier to resist the easy to grab candy.

Give yourself some credit already for the number of times you have picked yourself up after a slip. All it takes to win is to get up one more time than you fall down, so please don't give up.

Kia kaha (as they say here in NZ). Stand strong.

[katemary]

Hmmm, I sympathise but I am not sure I have any answers. I did primal so well for nine months 2 years ago, lost 20 kg, and then losst my way and am back to where I started, on and off primal. I keep wondering how I might be normal weight now, and incredibly healthy, if I stayed on track. I get so disheartened it is such a long journey.

I have to go very strict or I make excuses. But then when I fail I tend to binge and eat lots of crap telling myself I can because tomorrow I will be strict again.

I'd say journal, but I just don't journal when I have been bad - the holes in my journal speak volumes.

Can you encourage someone to do it with you? So you can get excited about new recipes or tips. Someone to do long walks or sprints with?

I wish I could offer more. I am in the same boat...

[Jena]

I saw this post last night and intended to respond, but got distracted somehow and never did. I feel your pain... just not with primal. I have tried a million other stupid diets and failed a million other stupid times. That's the great thing about being primal to me. I don't really have to try... I just changed my entire life. Easy, right? But really, I just started to think about every single thing I ate and decided if it was fuel for my body or just something to make me fat, bloated, and eventually sick. When I think about what certain foods actually do to my body I get sick to my stomach. I don't know if I was just ready to change and that's why it clicked with me. I do know that it has less to do with willpower and more to do with attitude. I am not saying yours is bad at all. I'm just saying that for me, once I dropped all of my excuses I was able to do it pretty easily. I also have a lot of weight to lose and I know it can seem impossible sometimes, but it isn't. I would like to lose about 60 more pounds, if not a little more, I know that this could easily take me another year, but at least its a year of moving in the right direction... not a year of adding ten more pounds, right? You can do it Believe in yourself!! Trust me, if I can do it... anyone can!