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Thread: Am I doing the right thing? page

  1. #1
    Emtropy's Avatar
    Emtropy is offline Senior Member
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    Am I doing the right thing?

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    Okay, so I've posted a lot of questions on here regarding my weight. But for those who don't know, I'm a 14 year old girl who does cycling who needs to lose weight. My mam and dad say, I say, even some people at cycling have commented on my weight.

    I've been trying to follow a paleo diet mostly, but it's hard with low-fat, calorie-restrictive parents. I've noticed that my mam has been giving me less and less on my plate, in order for me to "lose weight." Doesn't work though, I normally end up snacking on biscuits and chocolate, out of defiance and hunger.

    So after the millionth time my dad had a go at me for making scrambled eggs with butter this morning, and after he grabbed the pan and threw the butter away, I told him that I've had enough. I've had enough of cycling and not getting anywhere competitively, I've had enough of judgemental assholes who comment on my weight and say losing weight is "easy" like I haven't tried hard enough. I've been trying for over a year now. They say they want me to be healthy, but they don't care about my mental health, and they think being hungry is normal when you're trying to lose weight. My mam also says I've been brainwashed because I don't believe the low-fat dogma.

    So I want to do full paleo, weight-loss diet. I want to lose weight atkins style then gradually introduce my carbs so I can continue to cycle. I want my energy to go up and I want to be flat-stomached so I can feel happier and prove a point to my overweight dad who thinks he is morally superior because he doesn't eat red meat.

    So can someone please help me? What do I have to eat in order to lose weight? I don't need to keep my energy up because I won't be cycling for a few weeks. Can someone give me a meal plan or something?

    I'm sorry if this comes across as arrogant or rude, but I'm really sick and upset about the way people have been treating me and it saddens me that so many people are clueless about a good diet.

    I'm 5.3" and 150 pounds.

  2. #2
    teach2183's Avatar
    teach2183 is offline Senior Member
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    You may need to get your parents on board because of your age. Will either one read Primal Blueprint or the primer from the website? How about making a deal with your parents. Acknowledge to them that what you're doing now isn't working. Ask them if they will let you try Primal for a set period of time - 2 weeks, 1 month? If you attack it from being on their side and show them your frustration with the current situation, it may be easier to get them to work with you.

  3. #3
    sbhikes's Avatar
    sbhikes is online now Senior Member
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    I guess you posted in two different areas. Anyway, here is a link with some stories you might appreciate. There's one that sounds similar to yours. You might appreciate knowing you aren't alone.
    Food Struggles & Victories - Nia Shanks
    Female, 5'3", 49, Starting weight: 163lbs. Current weight: 135 (more or less).
    Starting squat: 45lbs. Current squat: 180 x 2. Current Deadlift: 230 x 2

  4. #4
    Lewis's Avatar
    Lewis is offline Senior Member
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    I'll try to be helpful.

    Quote Originally Posted by ebrady98 View Post
    ... even some people at cycling have commented on my weight.
    First off, take no notice of them. That's just rude.

    It's a difficult situation. Control what you can. Don't forget that there are other factors besides food that bear on this.

    Get as much sleep as you can. I guess no-one's going to get on your back for that. Have a look at this short article. It's on sleep as an anti-cancer device but applies to sleep for all of us for all reasons in general:

    Sleeping Away Cancer - Caveman Doctor

    Look at what he says about light, too. If you must use a PC after dark, use f.lux to change the screen display from the colour light is at midday. Midday-coloured light will screw with your hormones and hence your weight:

    f.lux: software to make your life better

    Besides the dark the other thing is the cold. Feeling a little cold seasonally is part of the natural cycle on earth -- and not doing so impacts on weight. No need to freeze but don't be always unnaturally and uncomfortably warm. Have a look at this:

    Why leaving the heating off and avoiding the gym could help you lose weight | Mail Online

    I've been trying to follow a paleo diet mostly, but it's hard with low-fat, calorie-restrictive parents. I've noticed that my mam has been giving me less and less on my plate, in order for me to "lose weight." Doesn't work though, I normally end up snacking on biscuits and chocolate, out of defiance and hunger.
    No, it won't work. This is the bad result of fifty years of propaganda for broken ideas. Don't be angry at them, because they do what they do because they love you. But starving someone doesn't work.

    If you can -- I know it's difficult and emotions take over -- don't eat the biscuits out of annoyance. Really dark chocolate is OK. Ask for it. Say can they buy you some of the really dark 85% cocoa chocolate? -- say that's because you want the low-sugar chocolate. Most people don't get that (good) fats are OK, but almost everyone realizes that sugar is bad.

    So after the millionth time my dad had a go at me for making scrambled eggs with butter this morning, and after he grabbed the pan and threw the butter away, I told him that I've had enough. I've had enough of cycling and not getting anywhere competitively, I've had enough of judgemental assholes who comment on my weight and say losing weight is "easy" like I haven't tried hard enough.
    All to easy to sit here and give advice ... but if you can work around it ... How do they feel about olive oil? That's often promoted as "heart healthy". Can you make the scrambled eggs with olive oil?

    When you think about it how much might you be able to pull over on them by being non-confrontational but knowing how to get what you need?

    I don't mean to teach anyone to be manipulative, but if you don't try to be in a bad way there's no harm. Do they know avocados are high in fat? Do they know coconut milk is?

    Don't confront. Appear to agree even. Ask things like can you make guacamole to eat with carrot and celery sticks? The point there would be the guacamole, but you don't have to advertise the fact.

    Print off Diane Sanfillipo's chocolate mousse and ask can you make this healthy low-sugar mousse?

    Easy Recipe: Dairy Free Chocolate Mousse (or Pudding) | Balanced Bites | Holistic & Paleo Nutrition Education

    The avocado in it makes it reasonably high fat, but do you need to tell anyone that. It also uses two tablespoons of coconut milk ... who gets to drink the rest with any luck?

    I've been trying for over a year now. They say they want me to be healthy, but they don't care about my mental health
    You know what hugely governs that? Sufficient intake of the fatty acid DHA from oily fish. They can't disagree with that: even the NHS says so:

    Fish and shellfish - Live Well - NHS Choices

    So I want to do full paleo, weight-loss diet. I want to lose weight atkins style then gradually introduce my carbs so I can continue to cycle. I want my energy to go up and I want to be flat-stomached so I can feel happier and prove a point to my overweight dad who thinks he is morally superior because he doesn't eat red meat.
    You probably don't need Atkins. At your age you're probably not so badly broken that good sleep in a properly darkened room and just avoiding highly refined processed carbs wouldn't fix you. Try not to polarize the issue.

    I'm sorry if this comes across as arrogant or rude, but I'm really sick and upset about the way people have been treating me and it saddens me that so many people are clueless about a good diet.
    It doesn't in the least come across as that. Best of luck.
    Last edited by Lewis; 10-30-2012 at 11:31 AM.

  5. #5
    Urban Forager's Avatar
    Urban Forager is online now Senior Member
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    I really think you are going to have to get your parents on board for this to work. Teach's suggestions are spot on. I know if my 14 yr. old son came to me and told that he'd done his research and would like to try this way of eating I would listen to him. I'm impressed that some one your age has found this site and wants to try it out. Maybe if you emphasis to your parents that this diet is about eating whole foods and limiting your sugar intake they will be receptive. Good luck to you.

  6. #6
    Kochin's Avatar
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    I went from a large UK size 16 to a slim 12 in three months by: reducing fatty meat, not eating bread or cakes, not eating anything with added sugar and walking at least an hour a day.
    If you crash your sugar/carb and fat intakes right down "a-la-Atkins", make sure to get all your vital nutrients and fats, as you're still growing and need healthy fats to keep your brain growing and developing and to ensure no risks of osteoporosis in the future. I'd actually recommend something more along the lines of the Whole30 plan as, at your age, you need to protect your body and fat restriction isn't always healthy.
    Keep a food-log, a weight-log (with body-fat-%, if you can!) and an exercise log. Try different things until you're losing as you want to be and, once you're a weight you're happy with, go Paleo to stabilize. Also, try and not lose weight as fast as I did. As impressive as it sounds, I have HORRIBLE stretch-marks from it...

    Good luck!

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