View Poll Results: What should I do when my husband wants to cook pasta for guests?

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  • Eat the sauce from round the pasta and try and hide the fact I'm avoiding it.

    7 25.00%
  • Make a big fuss about it in front of my guests.

    1 3.57%
  • Lie and say the doctor has told me to avoid gluten.

    13 46.43%
  • Shut up and eat the damned pasta.

    7 25.00%
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Thread: Husband wants to cook pasta for guests page

  1. #1
    orielwen's Avatar
    orielwen is offline Senior Member
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    Husband wants to cook pasta for guests

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    My husband and I started this together a few months ago. We've both seen good results, but I think it's benefited him more than me. I've had a bit of an uncomfortable gut since a little before starting this and it hasn't gone away. I do wonder whether it's gluten-related, but haven't been able to cut it out for much more than a week at a time to test. (A blood test for coeliac recently came back negative.) The trouble is that he's the cook, and although he sees and extols the benefits of this way of eating, he doesn't believe gluten and grains have much to do with it: he thinks it's all about carbs. So he thinks nothing of buying sausages with breadcrumbs in, or adding a little flour to thicken a sauce.

    And when we have guests round, as we will on Sunday, he uses that as an excuse to cook all the pasta and fancy pastries that he's been denying himself. I feel rather undermined by this, not only because it's another setback in trying to discover whether my gut problems are gluten-related but because I talk about how good eating lots of meat and vegetables is to my friends, but when they come to visit we feed them pasta and pastries. Hardly a good advertisement.

    I'm not a very assertive person and have already tried to persuade him to avoid the flour, without success. So what, if anything, should I do about it?

  2. #2
    orielwen's Avatar
    orielwen is offline Senior Member
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    I should add that I know I won't have the willpower to avoid the pastries when they turn up in front of me.

  3. #3
    sbhikes's Avatar
    sbhikes is online now Senior Member
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    Can you eat the sauce without the pasta in a bowl with a spoon? Can you put it on zucchini, zucchini ribbons or even just chunks cauliflower? Or pour the sauce over a potato/sweet potato? Or serve it to everyone else with zucchini ribbons or portabellla mushroom slices for something different and impressive?
    Female, 5'3", 49, Starting weight: 163lbs. Current weight: 135 (more or less).
    Starting squat: 45lbs. Current squat: 170 x 3. Current Deadlift: 220 x 3

  4. #4
    Nady's Avatar
    Nady is offline Senior Member
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    I can't answer the poll~ as I've posted ad nauseum, I get eczema from grains/gluten. I wouldn't eat a pasta dinner or pastries~ I'd be a mess for weeks. So not worth it.

    If you never give your body the break it needs, you'll never know if gluten causes your issues. Only you can decide~ no one is going to 'save' you from making bad (for you) choices.

  5. #5
    labbygail's Avatar
    labbygail is offline Senior Member
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    Can you maybe ask your husband not to cook junk for guests? I don't mean by trying to persuade him, which you said has not worked. I mean in a straightforward way, "Can you do this for me?" If it were a one-time thing, you might consider letting it slide, but it sounds like this could be a recurring problem. Primal is for life.

    I have kind of a similar situation and am also not assertive. I don't make a big deal about what we eat, even if my husband requests his non-primal favorites occasionally, but we've gotten into a comfortable routine that is mostly primal. We serve our guests exactly what we would eat ourselves, which is not always 100% primal, and yet we've gained a reputation for serving fresh, healthy food. No one thinks that we're hypocritical (or if they do, they keep it to themselves) because we serve dessert on special occasions, and no one will judge you for it.

    However, if the pasta is the main dish, and there are three kinds of pastries for dessert, that's another story...

  6. #6
    labbygail's Avatar
    labbygail is offline Senior Member
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    By the way none of your poll choices are good

  7. #7
    meeshar's Avatar
    meeshar is offline Senior Member
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    Yeah, I can't answer the poll as written. Personally, I would have julienned zucchini "noodles", and maybe a pot of regular noodles (or even gluten-free) for guests if they want it. I try to make food that is primal but not strange when we have guests--roast chicken with vegetables, steak, etc. I did cheat a little last time we had family visiting because it was for several days, but even then it was still gluten-free--I used traditional corn tortillas for tacos, and just made a taco salad for myself. Dessert has never been a problem, I get rave reviews from non-primal folks for the desserts that I make, and they're primal treats made with things like almond or coconut flour.

    Sounds like your husband is looking for an excuse to cheat, at this point I would just make something for yourself like the zucchini noodles, and maybe a primal dessert as an alternative to the pastries. One recipe I've been eyeing is this one, it's not even touted as primal, it just already was because of the simple ingredients: Martha Stewart's crisp coconut and chocolate pie recipe - Style At Home

  8. #8
    Mud Flinger's Avatar
    Mud Flinger is offline Senior Member
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    I'm sure you can find a Dr. who has told everyone everywhere to avoid gluten, so that one would not be a total lie. There are a number of paleo docs who have said this, so pick one to follow.

  9. #9
    bloodorchid's Avatar
    bloodorchid is offline Senior Member
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    just pour the sauce over extra meat and veggies and don't make a fuss
    beautiful
    yeah you are

    I mean there's so many ants in my eyes! And there are so many TVs, microwaves, radios... I think, I can't, I'm not 100% sure what we have here in stock.. I don't know because I can't see anything! Our prices, I hope, aren't too low!

  10. #10
    primalrob's Avatar
    primalrob is offline Senior Member
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    i was looking for the "ask him to make some primal options as well" choice, but didn't see it. i choose that one.

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