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Thread: new journal, hopefully of progress page 9

  1. #81
    Annieh's Avatar
    Annieh is offline Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    Yum, katemary, I love asparagus.

  2. #82
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    man, I am being hit from all sides by various stress. Can I just have a couple of months of peace, geez my work is stressful enough. I woke up this morning and I could feel the pulse and the surge of anxiety, I thought, I need to sprint, scream, puke, smash a fist in a wall. I just can't catch a break, too many competing conflicting demands, people to keep happy. Coping with alcohol and sometimes crap food follows. Seriously thought this morning about possiility of having a stroke. Sigh, anyway been mostly primal but numbing anxiety, negative thinking and fear with alcohol, hope I can revert back soon.

    I just want to cry and scream for a few days, drink to oblivion a few more, take a couple of months off work............and then despair at throwing away a good career, 7 yrs at uni and shitloads of hardwork. Its hard to win sometimes. I am exhausted...mentally.

  3. #83
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    Hugs to you, katemary. Thinking of you today.

  4. #84
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    Thanks Annieh xx

  5. #85
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    Back to it.

    B: large long black, boiled egg
    L: grilled salmon and steamed cauli and brocc
    D: my tuna bolognaise - onion, garlic, canned tomato (cherry this time, I like!), tuna and peas.

    Supplement roll call:

    Mornings - mutlivitamin, krill oil, liver tablets, telfast
    Evenings - 5HTP, magnesium, liver tablets

  6. #86
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    Mmm, grilled salmon for lunch. How luxurious this primal eating can be

  7. #87
    katemary's Avatar
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    I agree!

    I just wish I knew what they grilled it in - hopefully the oil is from the fish!

    Exercise:

    Started convict conditioning programme

    Wall push ups - step one - 10
    Squats - tummy too big to do step 1 shoulderstand squats!! - step two, jackknife squats - 10
    Vertical pulls - step one - 10...not sure I am "getting" this one
    Knee tucks - step one - 10
    Short bridges - step one - 10
    wall handstand - havent tried.

  8. #88
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    B: large black coffee with coconut oil, boiled egg
    L: salmon and avocado and a potato hash thing (baked not fried), large black coffee
    D: lamb cutlets, baked with truss tomatoes and asparagus. Note to self - cooking time for asparagus not the same as for lamb!

    felt I haven't had enough fat, so had 2 figs and apricot, choped up with double cream. Bleh - wish I didn't. what a waste of calories.

  9. #89
    katemary's Avatar
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    5HTP thoughts

    I started it about 3 weeks ago when I was going through a pretty horrific time, emotionally, so I don't really have a baseline. My stress was starting to manifest in physical signs like waking with such anxiety, in my chest not my gut, that I had to throw up (or felt like going for a run, if I had the energy) and rashes were appearing and my eyes were swelling. So - bad time for baseline.

    It is banned here, so limited info about its use. I started taking it in the morning for stress and appetite control, but after further research I have been taking 2 150mg at night. Great vivid dreams - its almost like I am watching in high definition and have a running commentary about it at the same time.

    I am still dealing with a lot of stress at work and some personal revelations, but I think instead of reacting to everything like my whole being is a raw sore being constantly insulted, I notice something, get a fleeting appropriate emotion of annoyance, hatred, distaste or sadness, and just move on. Its weird.

    I wish I was not in such a bad state when I started taking it, to have a true baseline, but for now, I think it helps anxiety and depression, not so sure about insomnia (but hot and humid, so unfair time to judge) and jury is out on the appetite suppression.

    I have a big day tomorrow that may be challenging and will take some to work - happy to pop it half an hour before events turn.

    anyway, so snapshot of my 5HTP experience so far.

  10. #90
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    I hope things improve for you soon

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