Getting my kids off the junk and getting the fiance on board page

[PrimalPumpkin]

Ok so the fiance will be my husband on Friday but whatever....

I have one son who has always been a picky eater. He is 14. He lived with his dad for 2 years. His father eats garbage for the most part. Now all this kid eats is chicken nuggets, chicken, a little bacon or ham occasionally (he used to be a vegetarian because of sensory issues), corn, cucumbers, pizza, chips, pancakes, bread, peanut butter, fries, fruit, yogurt, granola bars, cereal, candy, plain pasta, plain rice, and milk.

My other two kids spent the summer with their father and his girlfriend. He knows how to eat right and was even primal with me shortly before we broke up. He knows how well we felt and the kids felt and acted. Being on a low budget they ate tons of garbage all summer. Jail House burritos was especially popular. If you don't know what they are look it up and you will VOMIT. All they want to eat is chips and soda.

My fiance is an old fashioned farmer. He really eats pretty well for someone who only knows SAD CW stuff about food and believes you need grains to live. He has AMAZING will power when it ccomes to food. He drinks water and milk only. Occasionally, I would say once a week he will have a juice or a rootbeer. If he has a rootbeer that day he will not eat any sort of dessert. But he is stuck thinking you must have grains to live and he freaks when I use a ton of butter, coconut oil, or lard to cook something.

I really would like to just stop buying the grains and crap but I am afraid of an uprising. Especially picky son #1. Would you just stop buying the garbage and not make a big deal out of it. My younger two kids KNOW they felt better when they ate better. My daughter was so happy her eczema cleared up a lot. They both slimmed down. My son who was only 7 at the time knew he slept better and felt calm. I just fear son #1 will starve himself and my fiance will divorce me before we even get through a month of marriage. If anyone has a blog on the topic I would love a link!

[namelesswonder]

Can you work on food quality first? Homemade nuggets with gluten-free "breading", grain-free "granola" bars, grain-free pancakes, a different nut butter (instead of peanut), good quality yogurt with honey for sweetener (slowly reduce the sweetener) etc. It will be more effort on your part,

Does your fiance know that your family fared better on that way of eating? If they know they felt better, could they make the choice to eat Primal if you had Primal and non-Primal offerings on the table (keeping the pasta separate from the sauce, with spaghetti squash for non-grain eaters, for example)?

[PrimalPumpkin]

That is what I have been trying to do but the kids will just load up on the grains and stuff because they are there. They are old enough to know better but apparently not old enough to say no to the grainy stuff.

Of course this week is not the week to do it. Our wedding is Friday and we are having an all dessert wedding reception. I am having some grain/gluten free items but not many 80-20 right!

[namelesswonder]

It's your wedding! Do what you have to in order to enjoy it

[Damiana]

Can't eat crap if you don't keep it in the house. Stock up on lots of meat, nuts, chocolate, cheese, I know it's not primal but they'll probably revolt if they don't have some candy.

[magicmerl]

Rule 1 in our household is "I can't hear whining". Whenever my kids whine at me about something that's the response. You'd be surprised how well that works. That said, I see a whole lot of decent things that your first son eats. I bolded the ones that we have in our household:

Ok so the fiance will be my husband on Friday but whatever....

I have one son who has always been a picky eater. He is 14. He lived with his dad for 2 years. His father eats garbage for the most part. Now all this kid eats is chicken nuggets, chicken, a little bacon or ham occasionally (he used to be a vegetarian because of sensory issues), corn, cucumbers, pizza, chips, pancakes, bread, peanut butter, fries, fruit, yogurt, granola bars, cereal, candy, plain pasta, plain rice, and milk.

I really would like to just stop buying the grains and crap but I am afraid of an uprising. Especially picky son #1. Would you just stop buying the garbage and not make a big deal out of it. My younger two kids KNOW they felt better when they ate better. My daughter was so happy her eczema cleared up a lot. They both slimmed down. My son who was only 7 at the time knew he slept better and felt calm. I just fear son #1 will starve himself and my fiance will divorce me before we even get through a month of marriage. If anyone has a blog on the topic I would love a link!

When we first went primal we went all the way with the kids as well, and faced a rebellion about breakfast. We decided in the end that it's better to lose the battle and win the war. So one kid gets a choice of cornflakes or ricies (not anything that is high in sugar) and the other gets to eat porridge every day.

Everything else is stealthily primal, with the only remaining battleground being having pizza and bread. We don't have them at home, but if we're eating out we don't make a big deal about it.

[qqemokitty]

I am absolutely 200000% horrified by the definition of "jailhouse burrito" I read on urbandictionary.com and pray that no one is letting children actually eat this. D:

[jtuwiner]

I'm not a parent, but I do have two younger siblings who eat crap. I've worked with them to try some primal foods.

At first they were very skeptical, but as they saw me eating healthy they became more interested. I actually really hooked them on it when I made them Mark's primal banana almond pancakes. They were in disbelief that these pancakes they were eating were made out of bananas and eggs yet tasted better than normal pancakes.

I would maybe try just giving them some stuff that is on the edge of primal and then easing them into stricter primal foods. For example, my siblings had a touch of regular syrup on the pancakes, but it got their attention.

[2ndChance]

Cook delicious primal meals. Eat them. Enjoy them. Don't shove them down unwilling throats. Let Mr. Sulky eat a granola bar while everyone else eats like kings. The best thing you can do is lead by example. For many years I ate just like your eldest son. I ignored advice I was given to eat better. I was fighting a losing battle with depression and anxiety, though, and the first therapist I went to said, ok, first of all, you need to work on your diet. Realizing the food-mood connection was what did it for me. Suddenly this french fry fiend was shoveling down 2 big salads a day. After I opened my mind to new things (wait...broccoli is actually GOOD?!) I realized eating right didn't even have to be a taste sacrifice. Sure, I have to walk away from the 3 Musketeers bars now, but I made some organic chicken wings this a.m. using this recipe though I used coconut oil instead of olive oil and added some grated romano cheese and I would like to see ANYBODY, no matter how picky, walk away from a plate of these bad boys. I'm a changed woman. Your kids are lucky to have your healthy influence, but if you push anything too hard, you will cause rebellion. You don't want your eldest to associate eating junk with rebelling against you, because God knows teens love to rebel against their moms... Give them time to come around. It sounds like you've cultivated really good healthy instincts in the younger ones. Taste buds have a lifespan of 8 days (I learned this on Jeopardy) so given a little time, the memory of Jailhouse burritos will be history...all they'll recall is how they had no energy 1 hour afterwards and they'll never want to eat refined carbohydrates again...well, we can only hope...

As for the fiance, I wouldn't push him too hard. Steer him towards some literature about the health of fat vs. carbs... I find this article sums it up nicely, in layman's terms...

[Antiochia]

Perhaps your husband (fiance) would prefer to read the information in a book. Order Mark's book The Primal Blueprint and ask your husband if he would like to take a look at it. Tell him you would like his opinion on it, and then don't nag him about any of the primal information. That's what I did with my husband. He would rather read a book than a blog. Besides it is much easier to absorb the information and flip back and re-read sections. My husband calls Mark 'that caveman guy' but he at least has some understanding of what I am doing, and as long as the food I cook tastes good, he'll eat it. If he wants to eat grain crackers, or cereal, that's up to him. I don't buy bread-- we both realize our bodies have problems with carbs. He'll eat bread at restaurants though. I don't say anything. His diet is up to him.

As for the kids -- that's a tough one. My kids are grown and gone, although I gave my son Mark's book and he loved it. He's cooking primal for himself, walking, lifting heavy things, and is healthier than he's been in a long time. For younger kids though, until your husband is on board, you'll just have to make good tasting primal food, and keep offering it. Even before I was primal, I cooked many things from scratch with healthy ingredients (although we were still eating grains). At the time, my kids were so picky if you named a food I would be able to tell you which member of the family wouldn't eat it! Now that they are grown they eat so many more foods AND some of the healthy stuff I cooked that they wouldn't eat years ago, they now cook for themselves because it reminds them of home and growing up and they eat it (SHOCK)! Anyway -- just wanted to give you some hope. Set a good example and fix healthy food for yourself, while you may have to continue to cook their food, keep the nagging to a minimum and after a few months you may be surprised at how much healthier your family meals will become!